


Waiting

by MissMy80sShows



Category: Scarecrow and Mrs. King
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-19
Updated: 2018-06-18
Packaged: 2019-04-25 00:51:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 26
Words: 58,268
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14367363
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MissMy80sShows/pseuds/MissMy80sShows
Summary: Amanda and Lee have taken the next step in their relationship but its now left them with surprises and waiting.This is set after "Stemwinder" and will include "Unfinished Business".After watching the episodes, the ending of "No Thanks For The Memories" makes you wonder if they had a closer relationship than it seemed. Lee's comment of "a little candle light, a little bubbly, a little romance" has an intimate feel to it.





	1. Surprises

 

"Dinner was amazing. I still find it hard to believe you can really cook like that" Amanda said as she lifted her dinner napkin off her lap to wipe the corners of her mouth.

"Well, I can't live on take out alone, you know that, Amanda." Lee replied laughingly. "How would I possibly be able to keep this active lifestyle if all I ate was pizza, chinese take out and whatever other take out places there are around here. Although, there is that little place on the corner of M Street and Wisconsin that makes a mean chili dog…."

"Lee" Amanda folded her napkin and placed it beside her dish, "I don't even know how you can think of chili dogs after all that lasagna you just ate. And where did you find this wine. Its delicious. I mean I don't usually like red wine because sometimes it can have that heavy flavor but this one, I don't know, I can't quite put my finger on it. It has a… a…. Oh I don't know the right word for it…."

Lee couldn't help but smile, listening to Amanda go on as only Amanda could. Most of the time he wanted her answers short and to the point but after being on the run with her for those few days, he realized that her long winded answers and stories is one of the things he loved best about her. He just sat at the table and watched and listened, not really hearing more than a few words here or there "chocolate…. No no…. Coffee…. Maybe…."  _She's so beautiful. I can't believe I never noticed how beautiful she is before tonight,_ he thought.

"Lee? Are you even listening to me? I'm not sure but I think you stopped listening." Amanda looked at him, questioning him not only with her tone but with her eyes. She was looking at him, her head tilted, eyes wide, eye brows up. Again, Lee laughed as he looked at her.

"Yes, I was listening but I sort of …. Hey, um, why don't we clear these dishes and relax in the living room for a while. It's nice you don't have to rush home right away. How long are your mother and the boys going to be in Vermont again?" he asked. Lee stood up and started picking up their dinner dishes.

Amanda stood up quickly, almost too quickly and bumped his hands, almost knocking the dishes right out of them. "Ohh, sorry, sorry." she said, catching a falling fork in the process. "They're not coming home until Sunday. I wish they were coming home earlier because the boys still need to finish up some homework before they go back to school on Monday but the train only runs when the train runs. I told them they should bring their homework with them but you know the boys. They were too excited to see their cousins in Vermont. Here, let me take these salad dishes into the kitchen so you won't drop them."

For the next few minutes, they were quiet, carrying dirty dishes and the remnants of their dinner into Lee's kitchen. As Lee washed the dishes, Amanda quickly dried them and put them away.  _It's like she's always been here. She knows where everything goes._ Lee thought.  _How did I miss that before? You must be slipping, Scarecrow._

Picking up their wine glasses and the wine bottle, Lee walked into the living room and set them down on the coffee table. Amanda followed behind him, stopping momentarily before sitting down on one end of the couch. "Do you want coffee instead of wine? Dessert? I have some leftover cake you made in the fridge…." Lee asked.

Amanda simply shook her head as she picked up her wine glass, "No, the wine is fine, it's fine." Raising the glass to her lips, she took a sip, savoring the taste. Lee sat down beside her, his knees barely touching hers. Lifting his own glass, he took a long sip, quickly finishing what was left. Reaching across Amanda, he set his glass back down on the table and turned to her, placing his hand upon her knee.

"Amanda, I know we haven't had a lot of time to talk the last week or so. Billy's had us running ragged in every direction it seems, and Francine's been working hard at keeping us apart." Amanda placed her glass on the table beside Lee's.

"You felt like that too? I thought it was just me." She ran her hands over his, turning it over to feel the warmth of his palm. Not making eye contact, she continued "I figured Mr. Melrose was pretty angry with me after I spilled his coffee on those plans yesterday. And well, Francine is just being Francine. She makes her comments about me and well, I don't know, I think it's her way of communicating with me. I know she still thinks I'm incapable of getting anything right and after laughing at me when I spilled the coffee, I'm sure she really thinks I'm …."

"Amanda, stop. Please. Francine is just jealous. Really. She knows how well we work together and she and I used to be like that, a long time ago but we don't see eye to eye any more. If anything, I don't understand her anymore. Hey, look at me…" Lee placed his thumb and forefinger on Amanda's chin, guiding her face gently upward to look at him. "Besides, I know who I'd much rather be around anyway." he said softly.

"Oh you do?" Amanda answered, her voice barely above a whisper. Leaning forward, Lee kissed Amanda softly on the lips.

"I think, we shouldn't worry about Francine and concentrate on other things" he said between kisses.

"And what kind of other things?" Amanda asked innocently. He felt her smile as he kissed her.

"Well, I'd like to concentrate on you for a while. Just us, no distractions."

"Just us?" Amanda sighed. The feeling of his lips on hers were mesmerizing. Amanda parted her lips just enough to invite Lee to deepen his next kiss.

"Just us." And with that, he slip his hand along her jaw, to rest alongside her face, slipping his tongue inside her mouth.

Amanda slid her hands around his neck as she slid her tongue over his. He tasted of wine and garlic and so delicious.  _Wow…_ was the only word that came to mind. As they finally released each other's lips to gasp for air, they leaned forward to touch their foreheads together. Lee slid his hand down her shoulder to her waist and gently pulled her closer to him.

Lee took a deep breath, not knowing what kind of a reaction he was going to get. "Amanda, I know we haven't talked much about our relationship and where it's going or where we want it to go." He looked up at her, hoping he didn't scare her. He knew she loved him, she told him she did and well, Amanda was the most honest person he knew. She risked everything during the Stemwinder case for him.

"Lee, I…." Amanda was almost at a loss for words. She wanted to take the next step, she wanted to show him how much she loved, not just tell him with words but she was afraid. "I know I'm not as  _experienced_ as most of the other women you've been with. I mean, Joe has been the only…" Amanda said quietly, not making eye contact.

"Joe? The only…. But what about that weatherman, Dan, Dave…"

"Dean, his name was Dean, and no, we never, well you know. I think that was part of the reason he kept asking me to marry him. He figured I would give in at that point but I don't know, I just wasn't ready. Not to marry him and not for that. I just wasn't ready…" Amanda said shaking her head.

"Amanda, I don't want you to think you have to…. If you don't want to, or you are not ready, I'm okay. We don't have to. We can wait." Lee looked at her again, trying hard to read her mind and all the emotions he could see on her face. "Look, hey, I don't want you to do anything you don't want to do. I love you." Amanda smiled, looking up at him. His hazel eyes staring back into her dark brown ones, searching for answers.

"I love you too. I don't know, I just don't want to disappoint you, that's all."

"Amanda, you could never disappoint me. Just because I've had a few…" Lee began.

"More than a few" Amanda said shaking her head.

"A few" he tried again.

"Dozens from what Francine said, maybe more", she interrupted him again.

"Amanda, please," he pleaded with her. "Just because I've spent a lot of 'time' with other women, doesn't mean anything. I don't want to be with them. I WANT to be with you." He took both her hands in his, holding them tightly to his chest. "I just want to be with you," he repeated.

Amanda knew he was the only one she wanted to be with too. She had never felt love like this before. She knew Joe had loved her but it never felt like this. She leaned forward, and whispered, "Then let's move this to another room shall we".

Lee's heart skipped a beat. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. He let go of her hands to hold her face as he kissed her again. "Are you sure? Amanda, I just want you to be sure," he said.

"If you keep asking me, I might change my mind," she laughed at him.

"Okay, okay but one more question I have to ask. Are you… do you take…. Amanda, I don't even know how to ask you this?" It was Lee's turn to shake his head.

"Oh… I understand… no, I'm not on any kind of pill or anything like that. I tried after Jamie was born but it was just one of those things. I couldn't do it".

"Okay, okay good to know. That's okay, I'm prepared for the situation."

"Prepared for the situation? Is that what this is? A situation? Are you sure you were never a Junior Trailblazer?" Amanda teased.

"You…. come here" Lee laughed as he pulled her close to him again.

Lee leaned forward to kiss her, gently holding her head in his hands. He loved the feel of her hair in his hands, her lips on his. Slowly, without breaking the kiss, he guided Amanda to stand with him. She slid her arms around his neck to balance herself. Once standing, they both slid their arms down until the ended up holding hands. Amanda let go with one hand and started walking toward Lee's bedroom door. Lee stopped a few steps short and pulled her hand up to his mouth to kiss her knuckles.

"Last chance" he said.  _Come on Scarecrow. You sound desperate._ Not saying a word, Amanda reached forward and opened the door. Not skipping a beat, Lee picked her up and carried her into the room.

Placing her down near the foot of his bed, Lee kept his eyes on Amanda's as he brought his hands back up to her face. Using his thumbs, he traced the sides of her face from her temple, down her cheekbones to her jawline, then finally across her lips. She kissed the pad of each thumb as she brought her own hands up his arms to his shoulders.

Slowly, she unbuttoned the first button on his shirt, never breaking eye contact. Her hands were shaking just a little, from nervousness or excitement - she wasn't quite sure which. Lee leaned forward again to kiss her lips as he too began unbuttoning her blouse. Each button followed a kiss, slowly, not rushing, but enjoying each second.

By the time Amanda reached the top of Lee's pants, she realized she needed to pull his shirt out in order to finish taking it off. Giving it a little yank, she managed to pull the bottom of his shirt out, knocking him off balance at the same time. He fell two steps back, laughing, his eyes shining with a new brightness she had never seen before. Lee pulled his shirt off completely, tossing it aside.

Reaching forward, he quickly finished unbuttoning Amanda's blouse, sliding it off her shoulders, kissing each one as it was exposed. He tossed her shirt in the same direction as his. Sliding his hands around her tiny waist, he found the button and zipper of the navy blue skirt he was very glad she was wearing. He slid the zipper down slowly, enjoying the sound of the teeth separating. As soon as he hit the bottom, he let go and the skirt puddled around her feet.

Amanda feeling slightly overwhelmed, took a deep breath and reached forward to undo Lee's pants as well. He was still wearing his grey suit pants from earlier that day. She looked up into his eyes as her hands fumbled with the zipper brushing up against his obvious reaction to her. She pushed his pants past his hips and as they fell, she looked down and laughed. There they stood in little more than their undergarments with their shoes still on.

Lee looked down to see what she was laughing at and quickly saw the problem. "Some spies we are. Can't even get undressed properly" he laughed.

Toeing his shoes off, his pants slid completely to the floor. Lee bent down to slide off his socks, move his shoes and toss his pants in the direction of his shirt. He tapped Amanda gently on the leg to lift her feet so he could move her skirt as well. He ran his hand down each calf to slide her shoes off. She shivered at his touch. Standing there in nothing more than her white satin and lace bra and matching panties, Lee couldn't help think how beautiful she was again. Her thin figure hid the fact she was a mother to two growing boys. There wasn't the slightest mark on her skin that he could see in the dim light. He looked up to see her eyes darkening and as he stood, he slid his hands up the length of her body.

"Amanda, you are so beautiful. I can't…" his words started to stick in his throat.

Amanda looked down, blushing. "Lee." Before either one of them could say another word, she leaned forward and kissed him again. Her kiss was slightly demanding, wanting to taste him more than she ever had before. She moved her hands across his chest, down his ribs and around his back to pull him close. Lee's hands held her tight to him, never wanting to let go.

Not wanting to rush things, Lee gently nudged Amanda back until her legs touched the edge of the bed. She sat down and scooted back until they were both lying on the bed, side by side, never breaking eye contact. Wanting to keep things slow, Lee began with soft kisses starting on her lips, moving down her jawline to her neck. Amanda shivered again.

"Are you cold?" he whispered into her neck.

"No, no, not cold, not… ah… cold" she could barely talk. She couldn't believe the sensations that she was feeling. "I just… oh… Lee…." He stopped kissing her for just a minute to look at her face. Realizing she was beginning to relax and obviously enjoying the moment, he continued kissing her throat, feeling her pulse quicken. He began stroking her skin with feather light touches. Kissing his way across her collarbone he soon found her bra strap on her left shoulder. Using his teeth, he pulled it off to the side until he could begin to slide it down her arm with his hand.

"All those times we were tied up and you having to use your teeth have come in handy huh" Amanda giggled just a little.

Lee chucked back "Oh Amanda, leave it to you". Reaching behind her, he unclipped her bra. Slowly, he teased it off one arm and then the other, tossing it somewhere behind him.

With both her breasts free of their lacy confines, Lee took the opportunity to cup her left breast with his hand. Feeling the warm weight of it against his palm, he kissed a line from her shoulder down to her nipple with was beginning to harden. He delicately pinched the tightening tip between his fingers before descending his mouth upon it. Amanda gasped, completely unfamiliar with the sensations he was creating on her skin and throughout her body. She had never before felt anything this wonderful. As he kissed his way over to her other breast, Amanda arched with anticipation. She moved her hand to his head, sliding her fingers through his hair.

"Oh Lee… this is …. Won… der… ful" Amanda could barely get the words out. Lee couldn't help but smile against her skin. He raised his head to look at her.

Amanda's cheeks were pink, her eyes partially closed. He leaned forward to kiss her swollen lips. She responded immediately, her hands rubbing his back, feeling like fire on his skin. He never wanted this feeling to end but then Lee realized something. He stopped kissing her.

"So when you and Joe…. No, never mind. I don't want to know." Lee started to ask.  _What in the world did they do?_ He thought to himself.

Amanda looked at him confused for a moment. Then she smiled and said "Lee, we were young, inexperienced. We did… well, we just did."

"So Joe never did this…." Lee leaned over and began kissing his way down her neck again with the lightest of kisses.

"Well he did but not like that" she replied breathlessly. Lee then moved his hand down her breast again, giving it a gentle squeeze.

"Or this?"

Amanda gasped. "Not quite". Lee moved his hand across her flat stomach toward the waistband of her underpants.

"You are sooo beautiful" Lee said. Amanda moved her hand to cover his and held it there.

Lee sensed her hesitation and stopped. Knowing Amanda as he did, he knew she needed a confidence booster to continue on.

"Hey" he said looking at her. "Come here with me". Lee swung his legs off the bed to stand and reach out his hand. Amanda looked confused but reached out and stood up with him. Lee walked toward the full length mirror beside his closet and stood behind her.

In the dim light of the room he could see her reflection. She was beautiful, standing there in nothing more than her white satin and lace panties. He put his hands on her shoulders, gently touching her as he spoke.

"These arms have saved my butt so many times in the last three years. And these hands have held mine through some pretty rough moments." Lee kept moving his hands down, touching her in a way he had never done before. "This body has cared and protected two wonderful boys that I can't wait to get to know better." He slid his hands across her waist to hold her tight to him. She could feel his body heat down her back but she wanted more now.

Amanda was beginning to get emotionally overwhelmed by what he was saying. She had never thought of herself in that way before. Joe had loved her in his own way but he never expressed himself well with words. She looked at Lee in the mirror's reflection to try to see what he saw. She looked at his face and understood everything. She turned to face him, reaching up to kiss his lips. She wrapped her arms around his body, pressing her breasts against his bare skin.

"Thank you" was all she could say.

Lee brought his arms around her to hold her tight, his desire becoming more evident as he held her close.

Amanda decided she was going to show Lee how much she really wanted him. She started with light kisses down his neck and shoulder, nipping him every few kisses with her teeth. Now it was Lee's turn to shiver. She worked her way down his chest to his stomach, kneeling down in the process. She ran her fingers along the waistband of his boxer shorts, slipping them inside and slowly began to slide them down his legs. Lee couldn't believe what was happening. He just stood there, watching her deliberate actions, trying to understand and calculate what she may do next. He was taken completely by surprise.

Amanda couldn't help but be impressed by the evidence of Lee's desire for her. His manhood was in full attention and as she moved her hands over it, Lee twitched inadvertantly. Wrapping her fingers around him, Amanda ran her tongue around the tip of Lee's penis. Lee instinctively reached down to run his fingers through her hair, lightly gripping the back of her head.

Amanda smiled to herself at that reaction. She knew this was one thing he would never suspect she would do. She may not be experienced in a lot of things but she at least knew how to do this. Slowly, teasing, she ran her tongue from base to tip several times before wrapping her lips around him. Once in her mouth, she circled the tip with her tongue, giving just enough pressure on the underside to cause him to jerk his hips slightly. Releasing him, he pulled her up the length of his body to capture her mouth with his own.

"Now where did you learn that trick?" he asked gasping.

"That's one of my secrets, Scarecrow. I'll never tell." she said with a smile.

"Well, I have a few tricks of my own." Lee reached down to slide her panties down, sweeping her off her feet and into his arms. He carried her back to his bed and layed her down. Sitting beside her, he opened the drawer to the nightstand and pulled out a condom packet.

"We don't want to forget this, do we?" Lee put the packet on the pillow beside Amanda. He lay back down beside her, kissing her desire swollen lips.

Wanting to touch her and be closed to her, he ran his hand down her side, across her stomach and down to her hip. His hand moved lower, touching her hot center. Slipping a finger into her, he couldn't believe how intense her desire for him was. Pulling her close, Lee couldn't get enough of her. He reached across her to the pillow to get the condom.

Amanda put her hand up to stop him. "Let me do it" she said. Carefully opening the packet, she took it out and reaching down without even looking she unrolled it down his length, squeezing him gently as she did it.

_Where'd she learn that?_ Lee couldn't help but think his Amanda was not as inexperienced as she thought.

Maneuvering above her, Lee balanced himself on one hand so he could guide himself into her. Aligning himself against her, he slowly pushed forward into her very hot and very tight center.

Amanda gasped "OH".

Lee stopped immediately. "Did I hurt you?"

"No, no, its just been a very long time" she replied.

Lee leaned forward to kiss her, not moving, just giving her body time to adjust.

She reached up to hold his hand and said, "I'm ok, I want this…. I want you…." Moving very slowly at first, Lee took his time pulling back and pushing forward into her again.

"Amanda, I don't want to hurt you. If you're not ready for this…."

"Stop talking Scarecrow" she laughed at him.

"Hmmmmm Amanda".

Still holding her hand, Lee began moving within her. Amanda felt so amazing and he couldn't believe it was finally happening between them.

Shifting slightly, Lee changed his rhythm to long slow glides, gently rocking her hips upward with each stroke.

Deep within Amanda's body she felt something she had never felt before. A stirring, a tightness, something she couldn't quite narrow down but it was a wonderful new feeling.

Without even realizing it, with each stroke she tightened her grip on Lee's hand. Lee, sensing what was happening, changed his pace again, shorter faster strokes, each stroke, a tensing grip on his hand. Amanda could barely think. She had never felt this heat, this electricity running through her body. She adjusted her leg around Lee's hip to allow him a deeper access to what felt like her soul.

Knowing she was close, Lee leaned down to whisper in Amanda's ear. "I love you". He sped up his rhythm again, gauging her reaction.

Amanda could barely speak "Oh… my… gosh…" was about all she could say coherently as her body felt like it shattered around her. Each spasm started at her center and rushed out to every extremity. She gripped his hand so tight she knew she would see bruises there tomorrow. "Leeeeeeeeee" was the last word he heard as he hit his own orgasm, harder than he had ever felt before. Wave after wave rushed from him and with each remaining stroke, he felt he and Amanda would be forever one.

After what felt like an eternity, Lee's heart stopped racing. He looked down to see Amanda wide eyed but smiling. "I love you too" was all she could say. Reaching down, Lee held onto the condom as he slid out of Amanda. Tossing it and the wrapper into the trash, he then rolled over onto his back, pulling Amanda close to him. Kissing the top of her head, he just smiled.

_Scarecrow still has some surprises up his sleeves._


	2. Unexpected Reactions

Amanda lay in Lee's arms, still wide eyed, trying to figure out exactly what had happened. Her heart was still racing as was her mind. She leaned into Lee, looked up at him and said "Should that always happen?"

"Should what …. Amanda, what …. Wait", Lee was completely confused by her question. He brought his hand up and rubbed his forehead. Then looking at her face, still flush, eyes still opened wide, he realized exactly what she was talking about. "Amanda, are you? Was that? You and Joe?"

"Nope, never happened before" she said matter of factly.

"Never?" Lee couldn't believe what he was hearing.

Amanda rolled over enough to look him in the eye, "No, never" she said with a smile.

"Amanda, you're telling me you have never had an orgasm before?" Lee asked incredulously. "How is that possible? You and Joe definitely had sex, I mean you do have the boys."

Sitting up, Amanda looked at Lee. "Just because you're intimate with someone doesn't mean you know what you're doing. Joe and I were young when we got married. And well, like I said earlier, Joe was my first and only. So I didn't have a whole lot of experience with what we were doing. We just did it. And well, Joe's a .. I don't even know how to put it."

Lee began to laugh. "A quick draw?" he said between laughs.

"If you mean he finishes quick, well then, yes I guess you could say that." Amanda was beginning to become embarrassed. She turned away from Lee, got up and walked to his bathroom.

Lee got off the bed as fast as he could to catch her. He gently grabbed her arm to turn her to face him. "Hey. Hey, I'm sorry. That, um, that wasn't funny. I just didn't expect you to say that. I mean, Amanda, you are a beautiful woman and well, your needs should be taken care of first."

"And what needs are those?" Amanda almost spit the words at him, now becoming angry.

"Come back to bed and I'll explain. Or, better yet, I'll show you", Lee tried to lighten the mood with a grin. Sliding his hand around her waist, he pulled her close, leaning down to give her another kiss.

"No" Amanda pushed him back. She didn't want to get into the details of her sex life with Joe. "I need to … get cleaned up a little" and with that, she stepped into the bathroom and closed the door. Once inside she leaned up against it, desperately trying hard not to cry. If she was feeling self conscious before, she now felt ten times worse. A tear starting its way down her cheek. Wiping it away with the back of her hand, Amanda looked in the mirror.

_Get it under control,Amanda. Just get cleaned up. You can do this._

Reaching to the towel bar, Amanda took the washcloth down and turning on the hot water, started wetting it. She used it to start wiping herself down, realizing how tender she still felt. Tender, sore, but all in a good way. She had to admit, it did feel wonderful. And well, Joe never made her feel like that. Rinsing the washcloth again, she folded it and laid it on the edge of the tub. Standing there in Lee's bathroom, completely naked, she was feeling very vulnerable. Grabbing a towel, she wrapped it around herself, intent on marching right past Lee to get her clothes and go home.

"Amanda, please, open the door," Lee said. He leaned his forehead against the door, fighting his natural instinct to kick it in, or pick the lock. "Amanda, please. I'm sorry. I just didn't know. I didn't know…" He slapped his hand on the door, letting it slide down, defeated. Hearing the lock click, he watched the door knob turn and the door slowly open.

Amanda stood there, towel wrapped tightly around her body, her cheeks still pink, another tear sliding down her cheek.

"Amanda, did I hurt you? I didn't mean to hurt you. Please. I'm such a jerk," Lee was again fighting the urge to hit something.

"Lee, I think I just need to go home." Amanda was trying to figure out where her clothes were in the dim light of the room. Trying hard to avoid eye contact, Amanda kept her head down, spotting her skirt in one corner. She tried to sidestep Lee but he reached his long arms around around her waist to spin her back to facing him.

"Amanda, please, can we talk about this?" He was practically begging. "I don't want our night to end like this. Not our first night together, like this. Please, just come sit with me and we can talk."

"Just talk? You promise no funny stuff? 'Cause I'll get up and walk right out" Amanda was trying hard to put up a tough front.

"I promise, no funny stuff."

"Okay, I'll talk. But um, can you put some pants on or something?" Amanda was having a hard time concentrating on Lee's face as he was standing there, still completely naked himself. She felt somewhat protected with the towel still tightly wrapped around her body.

Lee looked down and almost laughed.  _Now she's going to get modest._ Shaking his head, he opened his top drawer and pulled out a clean pair of boxer shorts. Stepping into them and pulling them up, he raised his hands up, "Is that better?" he said almost sarcastically.

"Yes, now, I can look at you properly" she stated. Still shaking his head, he took her hand and walked her over to the edge of the bed to sit down. Amanda hugged the towel protectively, sitting down, smoothing the edges out as far as she could toward her knees.

Lee sat down beside her, taking her hands in his. "Amanda, look at me. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to insult Joe."

Amanda looked up into his hazel eyes, now full of concern. "Lee, have you ever heard the expression 'You don't know what you don't know'?" she asked.

Lee shook his head, "Yeah, Dr. Smyth uses it all the time. Usually when one of the newbies screws up a simple assignment because they didn't follow all the protocols."

"Well, Joe and I, well, we didn't know what we didn't know. I mean, being intimate didn't happen very often because he was away so much. And when we were together, I think there was so much desperation in those few minutes that everything would happen so fast. I didn't know there was so much more I could be feeling because I had never felt it before." Amanda tried to explain.

"But didn't you guys ever experiment, try new things, new positions? Foreplay?" Lee didn't want to press but now he needed to know.

Looking down at her hands, feeling embarrassed again, Amanda tried to decide how to explain again. "Lee, Joe's version of foreplay was a kiss here, a squeeze there, a little touch here, turn around and well…. The only position he liked was from behind. He used to say it was his favorite view."  _Why am I telling him this…. Because you love him, that's why._

"Amanda. There is sooo much more to being - intimate with someone. Especially with someone you love." Lee brought his hand to her chin, raising her face up so he could look her in the eye. Another tear slowly slid down her cheek. Wiping it away with his thumb, Lee leaned forward and gently kissed her forehead.

"Hey, no funny stuff. You promised."

"Oh Amanda." Lee put his arms around her to give her a hug. "Let me tell you a little piece of advice my uncle, The Colonel gave me a very long time ago. He said 'Skip, never leave home without your bed made, a dime in your pocket, and never ever leave a woman unsatisfied'. I was only 16 when he said that to me and for a long time I had no idea what he meant."

Amanda let out a small giggle.

"But, as I got older and more experienced" Amanda's eyebrow raised as he spoke "in life, I understood. He wasn't just talking about sex, he was talking about everything. How many meals have I cooked for you?"

"Oh, I don't know…."

"Fifty nine. Thirty seven dinners, three breakfasts and exactly nineteen lunches."

"That many?"

"And how many times have you commented you couldn't possibly eat another bite?"

A smile crept across Amanda's face. "Every time."

"And how many assignments have we been on together that didn't get completed?"

"Okay, okay, I see your point. But you and Joe…"

"Yes, Joe and I are completely different people. We don't share in the same thought process when it comes to a lot of things… You included. Amanda, I want you to be satisfied in everything we do, and now that includes here too" Lee patted the bed beside them. "Now, do you still want to go home because I'll be very upset thinking you left here unsatisfied." Lee pouted his lips, leaned down and gently kissed her cheek. Not getting an immediate response, he slowly began showering kisses on her cheek, down her neck to the soft hollow just inside her collarbone.

"Noooo," Amanda said in a whisper.

"I'm sorry, I don't think I heard you," Lee continued to kiss her neck.

"Noo" she said a little louder.

"No what?"

"No, I don't want to go home. I don't think I am satisfied just yet." Amanda dropped her head to the side to give him easier access to her long neck.

"Is that a challenge?" Lee couldn't believe his ears.

"Well, as Dr. Smyth also says, 'Put your money where your mouth is Scarecrow'."

Lee took this opportunity to lean forward, pushing Amanda back down onto the bed. Still kissing her, he tugged at the towel until the corner was released, exposing her silky skin to his onslaught of kisses. Knowing she was more inexperienced than he had originally thought, he was going to show her for the rest of the night how wonderful every touch could feel. She wasn't going to leave until she was completely satisfied.

"Amanda, I want you to talk to me. If there is something I'm doing that you like, I want you to tell me. And if there is something you don't like, or you are not comfortable with, I want you to tell me that too. I'm serious. Not everyone likes the same things and well, one thing might feel good to someone else, it may not for you. Do you understand?"

"Uh-huh" Amanda responded. She could barely put two words together coherently, how was she going to talk him through this?

Remembering he now had boxer shorts on, he stood up to take them off. Amanda sat up.

"Hey, don't stop".

Lee just smiled at her. "Don't worry, I won't." Leaning forward to kiss her again, he gently pushed her backward so she was scooting back up toward the top of the bed, leaving the towel discarded on the edge.

Sitting back down beside her, he reached into the top drawer of the side table again to pull out another condom. Tossing it on the pillow beside Amanda just like before, "We might need that in a bit. Oh, where did you learn that little trick from earlier. You slipped that on me without even looking."

"Lee, I told you, I wasn't really in a position to see what was going on so I learned to do it without looking."

"Well, from now on, I want you in whatever position you want to be in" he said with a smile.

Leaning forward again, he kissed her very slow, very gently on her lips. Amanda kissed him back, slowly at first but after a few seconds, her kiss became more demanding. Lee, taking her cue, parted her lips with his tongue. He ran his tongue across hers, sweeping along her teeth, then swirling around her tongue again.

"Mmmm" he murmurred into her mouth. He started giving her brief wet kisses down chin, toward the soft spot just behind her ear. He stayed there for just a few seconds, trying to see her reaction. Sucking gently on her neck, he slowly made his way down to feel her pulse rapidly speeding up.

"Remember, you have to tell me what you like" he said softly against her soft skin.

"Well, that I… like" she said between breaths. She felt him smile against her skin.

"Very good." Moving across her chest in a slow, wet zigzag pattern, Lee followed every kiss with his fingers, gently touching every inch of skin he could. Moving toward her breasts, Amanda arched into his hands. She couldn't believe how good all of this felt.

"Yessss" was about all she could say. Again, Lee smiled. Using his tongue, he circled her nipple which was very quickly tightening up. He grabbed the sensitive tip between his teeth and gently bit down.

"Ohhh" Amanda responded. Lee looked up quickly to make sure he didn't hurt her. "I'm ok" she replied.

Kissing his way over to the other breast, Lee repeated his actions with a different reaction this time. "No teeth…" Lee smiled again.  _Now she gets it._  Swirling his tongue around her nipple again, he gently suckled her instead. Arching up again, Amanda slid her arms up his back.

Taking that as a good sign, Lee began moving lower, dropping soft kisses along her stomach, stopping at her navel to lick her gently.

Amanda squirmed at this. "No, ticklish" was all she could say.

Shaking his head, he moved lower, down her hip bone, to the inside of her thigh. He felt Amanda tighten up.

"Hey, it's ok. If you don't like it, I'll stop. I promise. You just need to tell me. Do you trust me?" Lee asked

"I trust you. It's just… we never… Joe never…." Amanda sounded so hesitant.

"If you don't want me to…"Lee wanted to reassure her.

"I don't know what I don't know, right Sweetheart? So now is a good time to start learning."

Not wanting to give her a chance to change her mind, Lee started kissing her inner thigh again. Reaching into the soft curls at her center, he used his thumb to gently stroke her, finding the small bundle of nerves hidden between folds of sensitive skin.

Amanda responded with a sharp breath "ahhh". Her hips tilted toward Lee's hand. Using just his thumb he stroked firmly, He dipped his tongue toward her hot, wet center. "Wooaaahhh" Amanda hands immediately went to Lee's head. Running her fingers through his hair, she gripped it slightly, not pushing him away but holding onto him.

Taking this as a positive response, he alternated between his thumb rubbing against her and his tongue. Amanda's hips seemed to move on their own accord. Her breathing was beginning to become erratic and any attempt at vocalizing real words were lost to the wind. Lee tried a new tactic by slipping two fingers inside her tight core, curling them upward. "Oooohhhh" was Amanda's response. Gently stroking her from the inside, Lee continued his ministrations on her sensitive nub.

"Oh Lee. Yes… Yesss…. Yessss"  _I guess she likes that._ He thought, smiling.

Amanda couldn't control anything that was going on with her body. She felt helpless but wonderful all at the same time. Her hips were moving on their own, pushing against Lee's fingers and mouth searching for something, she just wasn't sure what. Her hands were in his hair pulling him tighter so he wouldn't… couldn't stop? Then she felt it, just like earlier, that heat, electricity, like a ball from deep inside her. Before she knew it, she was exploding, shattering, and Lee was there, holding on, still stroking, rubbing, until she stopped shaking.

Sliding his fingers out of her, Lee kissed his way back up her body to slide his arms around her. Holding her, waiting for her heart rate to come down, he simply stayed there, not pushing her to do anything else.

"Wwwoooowwww, that was um, um, just wow." Amanda was almost speechless. She didn't know what to say.

Lee still held her after a few minutes, began gently stroking her arm. "You okay? I didn't hurt you did I?" Lee wanted to make sure she was comfortable before he moved on.

Amanda looked up at him, her brown eyes, darker than he had ever seen them before.

"Was that my first or second lesson?" she asked, her voice huskier than usual.

Smiling, Lee said "That was just one of many and I don't think we will get to all of them tonight but um, studying is going to be very interesting."

Amanda smiled back at him. "Can I try something?"

"Amanda, you don't have to ask. If there is something you want to do, something you might like, I want you to do it. Making love with you isn't a one person activity."

Amanda's eyebrows went up in surprise. "Did you just say we were making love?"

Now it was Lee's turn to be surprised. "Yes, because that's what it is, isn't it? I mean I love you, you love me, this isn't a casual one night stand. I've wanted to make love to you for a long time, just as long as I waited to tell you I loved you I think."

"Oh Lee, I love you"

Amanda leaned up to kiss him. Just as he had before, she started slow, quickly assaulting his tongue with her own. She pulled his tongue into her mouth where she gently sucked on it. Releasing his tongue, she tugged on his bottom lip with her teeth. Lee smiled against her mouth, enjoying his partner's turn to take charge. Pulling herself forward, Amanda tucked her knees beneath her so she could get a better angle for what she was thinking.

She began showering his face with gentle kisses, moving lower to his neck, feeling his pulse quicken under her lips. Mimicking Lee's actions from earlier, Amanda covered Lee's chest with wet kisses, moving downward toward her goal. Deciding the easiest way to reach it would be to straddle him, Amanda swung her legs over his, quickly getting Lee's attention.

"Amanda…"

"My turn" was all she said. Reaching down, she wrapped her hands around Lee's impressive manhood, squeezing gently. Lee twitched in response, his hand coming up to rest on Amanda's shoulder. Sliding one hand down to cup his soft sack in her hand, Amanda opened her mouth and covered the head of her prize. Lee's eye nearly rolled to the back of his head. Looking down to watch her, he never once thought he would see her like this. Amanda continued to swirl her tongue around in circles, pressing her tongue against the underside of head, remembering how much he liked that earlier. Lee's hip jerked forward again. Taking a deep breath, Amanda began slowly sliding her mouth up and down his shaft, squeezing with her hand what she couldn't cover.

"Ohhh Amanda" Lee moaned. "That feels so … oh… good. God" Smiling, Amanda continued her attack on him. Lee's hips jerked forward again.

Deciding she wanted to try something else, Amanda reached up for the packet now beside Lee on the pillow. Lee just watched, trying to anticipate what she may be thinking. Tearing the packet open with her teeth, Amanda pulled the condom out and rolled it on him again without looking. Lee just shook his head, impressed once again with the ease and quickness she did it.

Amanda took a deep breath again, and straddling him on her knees, she lined him up with her center. Now Lee understood what she was doing, he leaned forward to help her, balance her, watch her. Leaning back onto her heels, Amanda felt him slide completely into her. She froze, unsure of what she should do next.

Lee raised his knees and planted his feet on the bed to give them both some leverage. He reached forward, sliding his hands up her arms to hold her face in his hands. She brought her hands up to cover his and leaned forward just a bit to kiss him. During this kiss, he felt her begin to move, slowly, hesitantly. Moving his hands down, he found her breasts and held them both in his hands, moving his thumbs over her sensitive tight nipples again.

"Oh Lee, yes…. " she moved her hands down to his chest, copying his actions on his own man nipples.

"Oh Amanda".

Smiling, she began to move a little faster, using the position of his legs to her advantage. Then, without warning, he shifted his hips just a little and began thrusting up as she pushed down.

"Amanda, ohhhh Amanda." Lee knew he wasn't going to hold off much longer.

Amanda could feel her own pressure starting to build but it felt different than before so she leaned forward, rolling her hips just enough to find that spot. That wonderful sensitive spot she never knew existed before tonight. Lee watched as the woman he loved transformed right before his eyes.

She smiled at him as the first wave of pleasure hit her, calling his name, dropping her head to his chest to ride out the rest of the waves. He continued to move in her until his own waves crashed. Again and again, with each thrust of his hips, her name on his own lips, Lee understood love in a way he never did before.

Amanda finally relaxed forward, her chest heaving, heart beating fast, her body covered in a thin layer of sweat. Lee wrapped his arms around her, still deep inside her, not wanting to move at all. After a few minutes, he realized they needed to move. He could feel his manhood taking a well deserved break of its own but knew he had to toss the condom quickly as well. Rolling Amanda to the side gently, he reached between them again to grab the condom as it began to slide off with her.

"Woah, we, ah, should probably be careful of that" he joked. Taking both the used condom and the wrapper, he tossed them in the trash beside the bed.

"I'm going to go clean up a little myself" Lee leaned over and kissed Amanda. She stayed on the bed, laying on her side, just watching him. "You okay" he asked.

"I'm more than okay," Amanda replied with a smile.

Lee smiled back, walking toward the bathroom. "Do you, um, want to join me in a quick shower?"

"I think I need to rest for a few minutes, but I will. Don't use up all the hot water" she laughed back at him.

"Ok, ok I won't." Lee stepped into the bathroom and turned the shower on, sliding the curtain back so he wouldn't get water on the floor. Once the bathroom began to steam, Lee stepped under the hot water, wishing Amanda would get in with him.

"Amanda… Amanda?" he called, "Really, you should come join me. I promise, no funny business. Just a nice relaxing show…"

The shower curtain slid quickly to the side, making him jump. "No funny business? You promise? Because I'm pretty sure I need a little bit of a break before we get into any more 'lessons'."

"No funny business," he said. Amanda stepped in behind him, picking up the washcloth she had used earlier. "Here, you stand in the water stream, loosen up any tight muscles you might have."

Handing her the soap, Amanda lathered up the washcloth and much to Lee's surprise, she turned around to wash him first. Rubbing the cloth across his chest, down his stomach, she wrapped the cloth around his manhood, carefully washing him, trying not to stimulate him.

Lee smiled, his body already trying to respond, much like it did when he was a teenage boy.  _She does this to me… makes me feel like a kid again…_  Taking the cloth from her before he couldn't control himself Lee lathered it up again with soap and proceeded to wash Amanda's breasts, stomach and very gently between her legs. Knowing she was probably over stimulated at this point, he didn't want her to hurt later.

"Better?" he asked.

"Cleaner" she responded.

Taking a minute to rinse themselves off, Lee stepped out of the shower first as Amanda turned the water off. He reached for a towel and handed it to Amanda then realizing the other clean one was now on the floor by the bed, he opened the linen closet to grab another one. They each wrapped a towel around themselves and wandered back into the bedroom.

"How about some dessert?" Lee asked.

"And more of that wine maybe…." Amanda said.

Lee just laughed, "yes and more wine." Together, wrapped in towels, they headed to the kitchen hand in hand.


	3. Dessert

Picking up the bottle of wine and the two glasses that were left on the table in the living room, Lee carried everything into the kitchen where Amanda was taking the chocolate cake out of the fridge.

"I can't believe you didn't finish this the other night. You ate two pieces at my house which is why I sent it home with you. I knew you'd like it." Amanda laughed.

"Well, I was just waiting for the perfect time to finish it I guess." Lee answered.

Taking the cake to the table, Lee poured two glasses of wine as Amanda cut and put the slices on two plates. Walking back into the kitchen, Lee got two forks out of the drawer and got a couple of napkins for them.

Sitting at the table in nothing more than towels, Lee and Amanda sat in silence for a few minutes, eating cake and drinking wine.

"If you had asked me this afternoon if I thought I would be sitting here with you wearing nothing but a towel, I would have said you must be daydreaming." Lee said, looking at Amanda.

"And if you had told me this afternoon those rumors from the Steno pool were true, I would never have waited this long," Amanda answered back, eyebrows up.

"Amanda, I'm sorry about what I said earlier about Joe. I really am. I just don't understand why…." Lee stopped, not sure what he was really trying to ask.

"Look, I don't want to talk about me and Joe anymore. What's done is done and what was in the past…. Well, let's just leave it there, can we?" Amanda put her fork down and put her hand over Lee's.

"Yeah, yeah, I see your point. I mean what you guys did when you were married isn't going to change what has happened between us tonight. Which by the way, was my favorite part of the evening. Wouldn't you agree?" Lee looked into her eyes. He saw a sparkle he had never seen before. She looked so beautiful, hair messy, the ends slightly damp from their shower, her skin, soft, glowing, and she could have been wearing a shimmering ball gown instead of the damp towel that was wrapped around her. "I love you" was all he said.

Amanda blushed, looking down at their hands, still together on the table. "I love you too."

Looking up in his eyes she shook her head so slightly trying to figure out what was going on in Scarecrow's mind. "But um, I do think we need to talk about a few things," she said.

"Oh really?" Lee asked. "And what things might that be?"

"Well, there are a few questions I think we need covered now that we are… we have… we…." Amanda started.

"We made love?" Lee finished for her.

Amanda couldn't help but smile. "Yes, now that we made love, we need to talk about a few things. A few things from your past."

Lee didn't like the way this conversation was heading but he knew Amanda wouldn't let up until he answered everything. "Do you um, want to move to the couch for my interrogation?" he joked.

"Lee, its not going to be that bad… I mean come on… I just think we need to talk about some of the things in your past."

"Okay, okay, but I think we may be a little more comfortable in the living room, that's all. Let's put these dishes in the sink, fill our wine glasses and then you can ask me all the questions you want." Lee punctuated his last statement with a kiss on Amanda's nose.

"You are incorrigible," she laughed. "But okay we can sit in the living room."

Lee collected the dishes and forks and placed them in the sink. Filling up their wine glasses again, he picked them up and carried them into the living room.

Amanda followed behind him, trying to decide how she wanted to start the conversation. Sitting side by side on the couch, Amanda picked up her wine, taking a long sip, sighed and started. "I'm not sure how to ask this so just hear me out. I was reading an article in a magazine the other day while I was waiting for Mother at her hair appointment. You know how they have all those magazines around, and well, most of them are wedding magazines and hair styling magazines because that's who they are trying to appeal to I guess, I mean I don't know, when we were there, I only saw older women so I don't know why they wouldn't have better magazines out for them…"

"Amanda, where is this going?" Lee interrupted impatiently.

"So, I found one of those women's health magazines instead. And well, there was an article called 'Protecting your sex life'"

"Amanda, I'm pretty sure we were well protected just now" he interrupted again, putting his hands on her arms.

"Lee, I know, what we just did we were protected but well, this article said that when you have sex with one person, you have sex with every partner they had previously. And I know I've only been with Joe so that's not going to be an issue with me but …. Just exactly how many partners have you had?"

Lee just looked at her and began to laugh. "Amanda, you have nothing to worry about. I, um, I always try to use a condom and on the rare occasion it hasn't happened I, ah, got tested for any surprises that may, um, have been picked up." Lee stuttered through his answer. He wanted to be completely honest with her but her question surprised him.

"Lee, I just want to be sure. I trust you, really I do, but I just need to know. How many…?"

"Amanda, no, I just…"

"Spill it, Scarecrow. I need a number." Amanda dropped into her stern Agent voice.

Lee looked at her again, "No, no, I can't give you a number. I won't give you a number. Amanda, none of that matters anymore. You are the only one that matters. No one else, no one from my past, just you and our future." Lee leaned forward to kiss her again, trying to distract her.

"But Lee, I just want to know what I may be up against later on. I mean, 25?" Amanda guessed.

"Ah, no, no." he replied.

"Higher or lower?" "

Ah, higher"

"50?"

Lee was having a hard time making eye contact "No, um, higher."

Amanda was having a hard time breathing "Higher than 50?" she said in a loud whisper.

"Yeah, um, look. I'll be honest. I stopped counting because really it didn't matter. None of them mattered. I was just looking for something I couldn't find, until I found you." Lee really didn't want to tell her he didn't know any more. He could have figured it out by going through all his little black books but even that wouldn't account for everyone.

"But enough about me, let's talk about oh that little tongue trick you pulled on me. You're telling me you've only done that trick on Joe?" Lee smiled when he saw Amanda look slightly uncomfortable at his question.  _Now who's in the hot seat._

"Yes, I can honestly say, I have only done that to Joe… and well, you. I was not very adventurous when I was younger. Too afraid something would happen. Remember how I told you the worst trouble I ever got in was hiding Debbie Ann McCabbie in my attic when we were eleven? Well, we stayed friends until we were in 11th grade and she got pregnant. I saw what it did to her and how horrible it was when her parents made her give the baby up for adoption after. She was so sad for so long. I just never wanted that to happen to me. So for the rest of high school, I dated but when anyone tried to do anything more than kiss me, I, well, I would give them a swift kick and run." Amanda shook her head, throwing up her hands for emphasis.

Lee just laughed.

"Well, when I met Joe, and we started dating, I let my guard down a little. And then after he asked me to marry him, I figured he was different from the other guys. We got a little more… adventurous… And well, one day he asked me to… to…. " Amanda looked down, trying to come up with the right words.

"Asked you to um, clean his dome?" Lee suggested.

Amanda looked puzzled for a moment. "Yeah, I guess you could put it that way. Well, I had never done that before and well, I did to him what I did to you and well, he lost it. Couldn't move my head fast enough before he looked like a firehose out of control." Amanda laughed at this memory. "I think he was more surprised than I was. So it was one of those things. We didn't actually have sex until we got married so that became his go to. And then after we were married, I only did that when we couldn't do anything else because it was that time…" Again she stopped, not sure how to finish her sentence.

"I get it, your time of the month. Amanda, I just want to say, yes, I've had a lot of partners but no one, and I mean No One has 'cleaned my dome' like you did." Lee laughed. "But I will never ask you to do that if you don't want to. I don't want you to think it's something you have to do or something you think I expect you to do during times when we can't do anything else.."

"Lee, I did that for Joe because well, he liked it. I didn't do it because he forced me to do it. And there is something you find you like, then I would do whatever it was for you too."

"I love you!"

Lee leaned in to kiss Amanda, tasting the wine and chocolate cake on her tongue. He couldn't believe how much he truly did love her. Listening to her talk and explain her sex life, or lack of, made him realized how special she really was to him. He didn't care how many partners she had had in the past, he just wanted to be her last. He didn't want anyone else to be with his Amanda ever again.

"I think, we should move this back into the other room where we can be even more comfortable" Lee suggested between kisses.

"Mmmm, I think I like that idea." Amanda replied, wrapping her arms around his neck, standing with him.

Lee swept his arms under to legs to carry her into the bedroom, placing her in the middle of the bed.

"And maybe we can lose these," Lee tugged at the towel still wrapped around his hips as Amanda took his cue and unwrapped the towel she was still wearing. Instead of just tossing hers aside, she sat up and took a minute to fold it into a nice hotel style square. Lee sat on the bed beside her, shaking his head and smiling.

Reaching into the bedside drawer again, Lee pulled out another condom and tossed it on the pillow beside her. "See, I've got this covered."

"No pun intended I'm sure," Amanda smiled at him.

Laying beside her completely, Lee looked down at her, playing with her hair. "I love you. More than I've loved anyone in my entire life."

Amanda reached up to touch his face. "And I love you, too"

As Lee leaned down to kiss her, Amanda wrapped her hand around his neck, running her fingers through his hair. They stayed that way for a long time, simply kissing, holding each other, not caring about anything other than being together.

Slowly, Amanda slid her hand down his neck, across his back to his firm backside. Her touch felt like fire on his skin. Lee copied her, sliding his hand down her shoulder, along the side of her breast, down her hip to hug her body closer to his own. Amanda could already feel his erection pressing on her leg. His manhood was hot against her skin, causing her to shiver involuntarily.

Lee leaned back, expecting to see she was hesitant about going another round with him. But what he saw made his heart want to explode. Her eyes had darkened so much with her desire for him. She was looking up at him with so much love, he thought he was going to lose it right then.

Knowing this was the third time that night they had made love, Lee knew it wasn't going to take long for him. He hadn't played a hat trick since college and well, he figured age might catch up to him on this one. Not wanting to disappoint Amanda in any way, he moved his hand down to the soft curls hiding her center.

Slipping one finger between her soft, sensitive folds, he couldn't believe how ready she was already for him. He stayed there for a few minutes, just stroking her, watching her face. She was amazing to watch. She smiled, tensed and would smile again. He knew he needed to feel her wrapped around him.

Lee reached across her to get the condom off the pillow. As Amanda started to take it away, Lee replied "Not this time. I want to do this one."

Amanda began kissing his neck, the tender spot just before his collar bone. Lee took the packet between his teeth to open it, sliding the condom out with just two fingers and reaching down between then, slid it on.

Maneuvering himself about her, Lee slowly pushed into Amanda, loving how tight she was, how hot she was and certainly, even after a few rounds already, how wet she was. Bringing his arms up to balance himself he began to move within her again.

Amanda wrapped her legs around his to give him deeper access, and finding that one spot she now knew existed. She hugged him tightly as he moved faster, rolling his hips just enough to start that ball of energy deep inside her.

"Lee… Lee…. ohhhhh, right… there…. Ohhhh" was all she could say.

"My Amanda…. I love you…."

Trying to hold onto him and what felt like reality, Amanda slid her hands around his shoulders, giving Lee a different angle in which she found even more pleasure than before. What started feeling like electricity now felt like fire burning in her very soul. Amanda tried kissing his neck but only succeed in leaving a rather dark hickey instead.

Lee dropped his head beside hers on the pillow to whisper in her ear "Let go, just let go. I love you. I'm here."

Amanda shifted her hips ever so slightly and with that and a few short strokes, she exploded in his arms. She clung to him, hanging on tighter than before, gripping him with her legs and even tighter in her hot core. That was enough to push Lee completely over the edge himself. He pushed deeper in her one last time, exploding as if it were his first time, riding out the last few strokes, before collapsing on her. Again, they were both covered in a light film of sweat but neither one cared this time.

Lee reached for the ripped packet, then down between them to grab the condom and tossed it beside the bed where he thought the barrel was. Little did he know, but he missed and it ended on the floor. Rolling off Amanda, he rolled onto his back, hugging her tightly to him.

Together they began to fall asleep, completely satisfied, smiling.


	4. The Discovery

Lee awoke early, his body a little stiff and sore from the previous night's rigorous activities. He couldn't help but smile as he remembered Amanda's reaction to everything that had happened. In the 4 years they had known each other, he had a hard time believing she had been unfulfilled sexually until now.

His arm was beginning to fall asleep as her sleep laden body was slowly cutting off the circulation below his elbow. Gently, he pulled his arm out from under her and kissing her softly, he quietly got out of bed to head toward the bathroom. As his feet hit the floor, he felt something cold and wet under him. Looking down, he realized he had missed the trash bin when he tossed the last condom they had used over the edge of the bed.

 _I must be slipping. I've never missed the barrel…_  he thought with a chuckle.  _But then again, it's been a long time I've needed more than one in one night._

Lee leaned down to pick it up and toss it into the trash when he realized something about it didn't look quite right. Looking closer, Lee saw the tear in the condom, not too far from the top. Shaking his head he tried to think of every possible reason that could have happened.

 _I probably did it when I stepped on it._ Lee tried to convince himself. Tossing it into the trash, he walked into the bathroom to relieve himself.

Once he was finished, he began to wash his hands, looking into the mirror. For the first time in a long time, he looked happy. The stress lines that were beginning to take shape on his face were gone. The tension that was so obvious in his jaw for so long was now replaced with a smile he couldn't wipe away. Grabbing the hand towel beside the sink, he looked through the open doorway toward the figure still sleeping in his bed. Lee could only hope that she felt just as happy and satisfied as he did at that moment.

Slowly walking back to climb back in his bed, he stepped again into a small, slimy wet spot on the rug. Looking down, he chuckled but immediately stopped.  _What if it was torn before I tossed it on the floor?_

As if hearing his thoughts outloud, Amanda rolled over, blinking in the early morning sunlight, she looked up at him. "Hi."

"Hi yourself" Lee answered with a grin.

"Where'd you go? I'm getting cold over here" she said with a mischievous smile.

Lee slid back under the covers beside her warm, naked body. "I just had to take care of business for a minute" he quipped back at her with a grin. "Now I think I have a little more business to attend to before we head to the Agency."

Lee reached over to caress her face, slowly pulling her to him for a kiss. "

Hmmmm. I think I need to um, take care of my own business for a minute first" Amanda replied. She crawled out from his embrace, slowly walking toward the bathroom.

"If I didn't know any better, I'd say you look like you are having a hard time walking. Any particular reason?" Lee laughed at her.

Amanda shot him a look but smiled and laughed. "Yes, it's just a little chillier in here than last night. I'm cold," she tried to make an excuse.

"Uh huh. And it has nothing to do with our activities from last night?" Lee teased.

"Can it, Scarecrow!" she called as she closed the bathroom door.

Amanda returned to his arms just a few minutes later.

"Feel better now?" he asked. She kissed him instead of answering his question, quickly slipping her tongue between his lips. They lay there together, tongues battling each other, until they were both breathless.

"Now that is a great way to start the day," Amanda panted.

"Waking up beside you every morning is how I would like to start my days," Lee replied. "But, Amanda, um, I think we need to talk about something…. Something I found this morning." Lee began cautiously.

"What could you have possibly found here in your apartment that would be that serious." She sat up to look at him.

"Well, I'm not really sure how to say this but um, I um, I'm pretty sure we broke one last night." Lee ran his hand along her arm, almost trying to comfort her.

"Broke one what? I'm fine, you didn't break me. I mean I felt like I exploded into a million pieces but I'm not broken." Amanda began to babble. " I'm pretty sure, you can't break….. Wait, when you say broke one do you mean what I think you mean?" She stopped talking, eyebrow up.

"Yes, I think the last condom we used last night broke. I can't be totally sure because I stepped on it but it looked ripped and well, I don't know."  _Good going Scarecrow. First amazing night together and you may have screwed up._

"Lee, do you know what this means? This mean I could be pregnant. I mean it could happen. Could have happened." Amanda almost sounded panicked.

"So, you are sure? I'm not an expert on the whole woman's cycle thing but maybe it's not that time that you could get pregnant?" Lee wanted her to calm down.

"Lee, remember when I told you I couldn't take the pill after Jamie was born because of the side effects it had? Every side effect you could think of, it started happening, the weight gain, the acne, the headaches, every month it was the same. Well, after only being on it for a few months my doctor said "Amanda, don't take this anymore, you don't want those side effects to get worse" Worse? I said how could they possibly get worse? So he explained how the hormones build up and then the scary side effects start happening so I stopped taking it. My cycle became so regular I could set my watch by it. I mean every 26 days, right on cue, there it is. I thought about trying something else but then Joe and I weren't really spending much intimate time together and well, I didn't think I really needed to try anything else. There was that IUD thing but I wasn't really comfortable with putting something in there that didn't really belong there. I mean, would you want something surgically put some place like that?" she said, talking faster and faster.

"Amanda, A-man-da, hey. It's going to be okay. What are the chances that today or yesterday was THAT day you could get pregnant right?" Lee interrupted.

"Do you know what day yesterday was?" she asked.

"Um Thursday?" Lee joked.

"No, yesterday was day 13 of my cycle. That means today is day 14. Exactly the middle of it. THE best days to get pregnant is right in the middle. Oh no, what am I going to tell the boys? And Mother? What about her? What do I tell her?" Amanda's head was spinning now. "She doesn't know about us, not really. I mean she's met you sort of but she doesn't know about US. And she definitely doesn't know about THIS?"

"Amanda, just calm down, calm down. We don't need to panic. After all, it may not have happened. We just have to think about this rationally. So what can we do?" Lee tried to calm her.

Amanda answered with only one word. "Wait."

"Wait? Wait? That's all we can do? For how long?" now it was Lee's turn to panic.

"Two, maybe three weeks. I still have another 12,13 days left and even then a pregnancy test won't register for at least another week after that." Amanda said softly. "What are we going to do?"

Before Lee could answer the phone rang, making them both jump. "Hello?" Lee answered.

"Scarecrow, you need to be in my office in exactly 30 minutes. Dr. Smyth is breathing down my neck about these reports you turned in for the Stemwinder case." Billy's voice billowed from the phone. "And bring Amanda with you. Apparently he thinks there are some holes in her report as well."

"Billy, can this wait just a little longer?" Lee asked.

"No Scarecrow! This can't wait! Do you want Dr. Smyth and his croonies ripping through your office?"

"Ok ok but it's going to take me more than 30 minutes to get Amanda too."Lee said looking over at her still sitting on his bed.

"Fine I'll give you 45 minutes!" The last thing Lee heard was Billy slamming down the phone.

"So you heard him. I think we have to move and talk about this later."

Amanda was almost in tears. "Later…. Yeah…."

Lee put his arms around her to hold her close. "It's going to be all right. We will figure this out. Right now we just have to get ourselves together, get to the office and hope that Dr. Smyth doesn't have any Aces up his sleeves."

"Sleeves, right…. Um Lee, we have another problem then." Amanda realized.

"What's that?" Lee was slightly confused.

"Well, the only clothes I have with me are the same ones I wore yesterday to work and well, Billy was the last person we saw at the office yesterday. He commented on my outfit, saying Jeannie had just gotten one similar. He's going to remember that. If I show up at the office in the same one today he's going to know something happened." Amanda stated.

"Yeah…. And we don't need Francine making any 'Walk of Shame' comments."

"Walk of Shame? What is that?" Amanda was now the confused one.

"Well, the walk of shame is when you show up somewhere after spending the night with someone wearing the same clothes you had on the day before. And then pretty much everyone knows what you did…." Lee sighed. "Wait, wait, I think your clothes from when we were on the run are mixed in with mine still. I just picked everything up from the cleaners and haven't had time to sort it out yet."

Getting up from the bed, Lee opened his closet door and pulled out the plastic wrapped clothes. Flipping through the hangers, he found a pair of her jeans, a blouse and even her sweater. Handing them to her with a smile, he said "Hey, no 'walk of shame'."

"No, but it's still early yet," was Amanda's reply.


	5. The Shark's Den

Lee drove them both the agency, worried what Dr. Smyth was hunting for now. Amanda was uncharacteristically quiet the entire ride. She sat beside him, simply holding his hand, rubbing it absentmindedly with her thumb. Lee couldn't help but look over at her several times, worried what was going through her mind. Pulling into the garage, Lee found a parking spot near the door. It was still early so not many people were there yet.

He put the car in park and turned to Amanda who looked like she was on the verge of tears. "You've been awful quiet. What's going on in that beautiful mind of yours?" Lee asked.

Amanda turned to look at him, "I don't know if I can do this."

"Do what? Come to work? We do it everyday?" Lee was confused.

"I don't know if I can face them. They are going to know…." Amanda shook her head, fighting the tears.

"Know what? Amanda what are you talking about? Are you worried about Dr. Smyth? I'll be honest, I'd like to know what has that shark sniffing for blood again myself. "

"Lee, they are going to KNOW" Amanda emphasised.

"You think they are going to know what happened last night? Oh Amanda, they are not going to know. There is no way they could know. Unless my apartment is bugged..."

"Francine is going to know. I don't know how but she will know." Amanda looked down at her hands in her lap.

"Amanda, look at me." Lee reached out for her hands. "Listen to me. They are not going to know. Your car is in your driveway in Arlington, it wasn't parked in front of my apartment all night. We didn't leave her together last night, you left hours before me. You have on different clothes than you did yesterday. The only thing that is the same is the shoes you had on. Good thing you wore those flat ones right? And its early… I bet Francine isn't even here yet. So we have nothing to worry about." Lee smiled the dimpled smile he saved just for her.

"Well, if you keep smiling like that everyone will know," Amanda couldn't help but smile back. "Okay, okay, I just…. It was just such a wonderful night I don't want anyone to ruin our memory of it."

"So are you still nervous about that broken condom?" Lee questioned.

"Lee, there is nothing right now either one of us can do about it. Like I said earlier, the only thing we can do now is wait." Amanda replied.

"Well, I can think of what I'd rather be doing than waiting …." Lee winked at her.

"But Mr. Melrose and Dr. Smyth are waiting for us. We should keep THEM waiting."

"You're right, you're right… Let's go find out what's going on."

Getting out of the car, Lee instinctively reached out for Amanda's hand as they walked inside the agency and into the foyer where Mrs. Marston was already there waiting. "Good morning Mrs. Marston, you are here early" Amanda smiled at the older woman. "The word of the day today is 'Community'".

"And good morning to you Mrs. King. My, you look lovely this morning. You are positively glowing," Mrs. Marston replied as she handed Amanda her badge. "And you Scarecrow. You look like you finally got some rest. Rest is very important you know."

Lee just smiled, "Yes, Mrs. Marston, rest is very important and if Billy would let my days off be days off I would get much more of it."

"Um, Lee, I think I need to run up to the Q Bureau first to check something. I'll, ah, I'll meet you in Mr. Melrose's office?" Amanda suddenly felt very nervous.

Lee looked at his watch, "We still have a few minutes, I should check my messages too. I'll follow you up and we can go from there. Thank you, Mrs. Marston," he acknowledged, placing his hand on the small of Amanda's back, he guided her up the steps.

By the time they got to the top of the stairs and in the hall Amanda's hands were shaking. Lee quickly unlocked the door to Q Bureau, guided Amanda inside, dropped his keys on her desk and locked the door behind them. Amanda just stood there, almost unsure about what to do. She walked around her desk and sat down. Lee sat in the corner of the desk and reached down for her hand.

"A-man-da there is nothing to worry about. Nothing. I promise you." Amanda looked up at him knowing he was probably right. He usually was so she took a deep breath and stood up.

"Okay okay I trust you." She stood up and as she started to move, Lee grabbed her around the waist and pulled her in for a kiss. Holding him tightly, she kissed him back.

"Just think, the faster we get through this with Jaws downstairs the faster we can get back to …." Lee teased with a smile.

Amanda hit his arm lightly "And if you don't wipe that grin off your face they're going to know exactly what happened," she said. "Let's go."

In the elevator on their way down to Billy's office, Lee leaned close to Amanda's ear. "Whatever they say, I still love you". Amanda blushed just as the doors opened.

Francine was standing there looking extremely irritated. "Can you believe this? Dr. Smyth called us all down here at this ungodly hour for what? Another witch hunt? I swear to you if this isn't something good I'm going to give him a piece of my mind. Do you have any idea what I needed…. " Francine stopped talking just looking at Amanda strangely. "Amanda, did you do something different today? Your hair maybe?"

"No Francine it's the same. I just pulled it up." Amanda walked quickly past her hoping she wouldn't notice the blush still evident on her hot cheeks.

"Are you sure because there is something different about you today…. wait I know…". Amanda stopped walking and turned to look at her almost afraid of what she was going to say. "You made top seller at the boys bake sale at school didn't you?" She asked. Amanda couldn't tell if she was being serious so she replied sarcastically

"Yes Francine. I managed to bake the best banana bread while Lee and I were running for our lives."

Lee had just stood by watching the exchange trying hard not to laugh.  _I'm pretty sure if they ever went toe to toe, Amanda would win hands down._

Francine turned to look at him "What's wrong with her today?" Lee just shook his head as he casually strolled toward the bullpen and Billy's office.

Dr. Smyth was already waiting in Billy's office as Lee, Amanda and Francine entered the room. Billy was sitting at his desk, scowling. "My, my, my if it isn't our favorite runaways. And good morning to you, Miss Desmond," Dr. Smyth announced as they walked in.

"Good morning Lee, Amanda, Francine," Billy nodded at each of them.

"Good morning Sir, Dr. Smyth." Amanda said politely. "Can I ask why we are here so early?"

Dr. Smyth looked at them, tilting his head to the side and stated, "Because I didn't like your reports on Stemwinder. Plain and simple."

Lee glared at him angrily, "You didn't like our reports? What the hell is the matter with 'our reports'? Billy, what the hell is he talking about?"

Mr. Melrose stood up, holding his hands up, "Just calm down, Scarecrow. Dr. Smyth, would you care to elaborate?"

Dr. Smyth stood up to address everyone, "Well, boys and girls, it appears we didn't all play well in the sandbox. We need to cross our T's and dot our I's and make sure we all understand the consequences of doubt. Our stories aren't straight, children. I need those reports rewritten and on my desk by noon today. And if there is any discrepancies between your reports, heads are going to roll…. Starting with yours, Scarecrow."

"What the hell is the matter with our reports? We explained everything, how Alexsi and Sonja manipulated the whole thing? What more is there?" Lee was furious.

"Dr. Smyth, please, I don't understand. I mean, I thought my report had every detail in it about Alexsi and Sonja and how we figured it all out." Amanda said, confused.

"And why am I here? I wasn't even part of their…. Plan…." Francine added.

"Settle down, settle down people! Now, I read over those reports myself before they were handed in and Amanda, your report was extremely thorough. I thank you for that. Scarecrow, it was obvious you did your own report for a change and Francine, you were just following my orders. So WHY do they need to be done over again?" Billy was doing his best to remain calm while inside he was fuming.  _Damn you Dr. Smyth. I just get two of my best agents back and you want to mess with them._

"Billy-Boy, I believe you may have misunderstood. I want to be sure Internal Affairs has no reason to come back after Scarecrow and Mrs. King. I've heard through the grapevine there may be an internal investigation as to how it got this far and I want to put a stop to this once and for all. So I expect to see the updated reports on my desk by noon today or else I might not be able to control what happens after that." Dr. Smyth opened the door to leave. "Oh, and next time Scarecrow, tell your playmate of the month to be a little more discreet. No need to upset the Steno Pool anymore." And with that, he closed the door and left everyone in the room standing there with their mouths open.

Francine looked at Lee, eyes wide trying to figure out what Dr. Smyth was talking about. After a minute she saw it. The love bite Amanda had left on his neck last night. Eyes narrowing, looking between Lee and Amanda, Francine was trying to see if there was any indication something had happened between them. Shaking her head she muttered "not possible". Looking at Billy she said, "Well, I guess I'll just head to my desk and start working on this. Shall we meet in the conference room in say 2 hours to compare notes?"

"That sounds like a brilliant idea, Francine. And, Scarecrow, you and Amanda get up to Q Bureau. Go through both your reports almost word for word if you have to but do not and I repeat DO NOT give Dr. Smyth any reason to question them. Meet Francine down here in 2 hours." Billy instructed.

"Will do Mr. Melrose. We'll get those reports perfect. Don't you worry about it…" Amanda began to babble as she got up to leave.

Billy interrupted her, "Scarecrow, I need a word with you… Alone, please, Amanda if you wouldn't mind closing my door behind you."

"Thank you Mr. Melrose. Lee…. I'll start the coffee upstairs." She quickly walked out of the office, heading toward the elevator, trying hard to avoid eye contact with Francine as well.

"Scarecrow, I never thought I would agree on anything with Dr. Smyth but for God sakes man, button the collar on that shirt. Show some professionalism here, son." Billy was trying to be stern but smiling at the same time.  _From Amanda's reaction when Dr. Smyth pointed that out, I'm sure she's responsible. I'll let them tell me in their own time._

"Um, yeah, thanks Billy. I'll um I'll make sure that doesn't happen again." Lee reached up to make sure his shirt was buttoned all the way.

"Now, can I have my office back please!" Lee smiled as he left and started heading back toward the elevators hoping to catch Amanda.

Francine watched him from her desk.  _No way, Scarecrow and Amanda…. Not… possible..._


	6. Reports and advice

 

Lee found Amanda up in the Q Bureau pouring the water for the coffee. Her hands were shaking to the point he thought she was going to have more water on the floor than in the coffee pot. In a few strides, he reached her, taking the pot from her hands.

"Hey, it's ok. Amanda, let's talk about this for a minute before we get into these reports." Lee was getting worried. He had never seen her this nervous, even on some of their toughest cases. Taking her hands in his, he held them to his chest. "Now, what's gotten into you?" he asked.

"Besides you?" she looked up at him and smiled. Lee just laughed and leaned forward to kiss her seductively. "But clearly not enough either…." he joked back at her.

"Lee, we are at work. Someone might see us, walk right in here. Remember, when we are at work, we need to behave like we are at work." Amanda replied, the nervous tone back in her voice. "I'm sorry about the mark on your neck. I didn't realize I did that. Do you think anyone is suspicious?"

Again Lee had to laugh. "Well, I don't think Dr. Smyth has any idea it's from you but I'll be Billy might have an inkling. And as for Francine… she'd never believe it… or she would deny it until she saw actual proof it came from you. And as of right now, I'm not aware of any proof, unless you want a reenactment of last night with a video camera perhaps?" Lee teased, his eyes flashing, his smile full of dimples.

"Lee! Why would… how could…. OHHHHH…" Amanda hit him on the arm, and tried to sound angry but her smile gave her true feelings away. "We need to get these reports done before Dr. Smyth comes back. And we only have an hour and 45 minutes before we are supposed to meet Francine downstairs," Amanda's tone turned serious.

"Well, if you want to pour the coffee, I'll start going over our reports," Lee replied.

For the next two hours, they spent go over each detail in their reports making sure they were close enough to not throw any red flags. Taking their reports and notes downstairs to the conference room they spent the next hour going over everything with Francine. Once they were satisfied their reports were similar enough to not cause any problems, they copied them over to give to Billy and Dr. Smyth.

Promptly at 12:00 Dr. Smyth strolled through the bullpen to Billy's office and without knocking, barged right in. "Well well well Billy-boy, do you have those reports for me?"

Mr. Melrose, more than slightly irritated, looked up at him. "I'll have to call you back," he said into the phone receiver and hung up, standing up from his chair in the process. Walking over to his door, he yelled out into the bullpen, "Scarecrow, Desmond, Amanda, in my office with those reports. NOW!"

Francine, still looking annoyed at Dr. Smyth walked in carrying her report with Lee and Amanda not far behind her.

Sitting down on the couch, Amanda looked at Dr. Smyth, "Do you think we have anything to worry about? Do you think they will still do the internal investigation?"

Dr. Smyth looked at her. He couldn't decide if he should feel bad for her or berate her for what they had done. "I'm sure, Mrs. King, your report will be nothing less than stellar as have all your reports, however, I'm not sure if Scarecrow's won't leave some questions unanswered. For example, why would you go to Mrs. King's home knowing full well she had agents tailing her? After all, you told her to keep them close, did you not?" Dr. Smyth looked at Lee directly.

"I knew my partner deserved some answers and the only way my partner would get those answers would be face to face. And I knew her family would be well protected against Alexsi and Sonja with everyone there. It was a chance I knew I had to take," Lee answered not backing down.

Dr. Smyth eyed him again, "And how praytell did you convince your partner to join you in your escapade, knowing full well what it meant. Taking her away from her family and the safety of the agency?"

"He didn't have to convince me to do anything. I knew he didn't do anything wrong and I promised him I would watch his back, like I always do. We work best as a team," Amanda repeated the words she had said to him that day in her bedroom. Remembering how they had also confessed their love for each other in that moment, Amanda smiled as she looked over at Lee. Lee also watching her smiled.

Billy did not miss this exchange but gave no indication he noticed it. "And that they do. Best team I have right now. In 20 years I've never had a better team. So Francine, do you have anything to add to this?" Billy turned to question her.

Francine was still annoyed about having to redo her own report. "No, no I don't. And if that's all for me, I have a few things I need to take care of before the weekend," she replied as she stood.

"Do you have good plans?" Amanda asked politely.

"Just some retail therapy at that new litte boutique on Bay Shore, dinner reservations at the new French restaurant near Emilios, a date with the son of a Senator - hopefully no phone calls all weekend," Francine rambled, looking straight at Billy as she said it. "After all, I am required 48 hours of off time after all this."

"Yes, Francine, I am fully aware of the Agency of the rule after a situation like this. And yes, you can leave as soon as we are done here. But we need to have an understanding that nothing, and I mean Nothing like this will ever happen again under my watch," Billy looked each one in the eye. "This could have torn this Agency apart. And if it wasn't for Scarecrow's quick thinking, and Amanda's help, it would have."

"Well said Billy. I couldn't have said it better myself. However, if we do ever find ourselves in a situation even remotely similar to this, your unit, all of them, will find themselves on the unemployment line," Dr. Smyth added.

"So can we all just go home now? No phone calls, the weekend off…. " Lee looked between Dr. Smyth and Mr. Melrose.

"I see no reason to keep you here any longer. Rest up children, Monday comes fast and you will be under scrutiny from now until the powers that be decide you are no longer a threat." Dr. Smyth said as he was leaving the office.

Francine was two steps behind him. "Don't call me, Billy, because I'm not answering my phone all weekend. I don't care if it is the President calling me to watch his back…" she said walking out the door.

"The only back she's going to be on…." Lee started.

"Lee!" Amanda cut him off.

"Goodbye Scarecrow. Amanda. Go home. Enjoy this weekend. Monday is going to come fast and we don't know what could be waiting for us. If Dr. Smyth is right, we are going to be under someone's watchful eye, then we need to be well rested," Billy walked them to the door.

"Thank you sir, " Amanda politely replied.

"And uh, Scarecrow, take care of things this weekend. We don't need anything unexpected happening again for a while," Billy said to Lee with a paternal tone to his voice.

"Don't worry Billy. I've got this covered."


	7. Second Thoughts

Amanda returned to the Q Bureau to finish filing some of the paperwork that had accumulated on both her and Lee's desk while she waited for him to finish with Billy. As the day was wearing on she realized how tired she was. Lee returned about a half hour after she did, smiling as he walked in the door.

"Hey," he said, "How about you and I skip this popsicle stand and go pick up some lunch? You must be starving by now."

Amanda looked up at him and couldn't help think she was pretty lucky to have him in her life. "Honestly, I was going to ask you to take me home. I was thinking a hot shower and a quiet nap sounded pretty good right about now. I didn't sleep much last night. Someone kept me awake most of the night," she said with a wink.

Lee looked at her and grinned. "So, do you mean a shower and nap for 2?" He asked suggestively.

"Lee, if I meant for 2, it wouldn't be very restful for either one of us. And do I have to remind you again, we are at work. We need to act like we are at work." Amanda sighed.

"Oh, so does that mean I won't see you later then?" he sounded disappointed.

"I was going to suggest dinner at my place tonight. We can have dinner, talk…" Amanda's voice trailed off.

"Ok, ok, but you still need to eat something now so let's say we pick up lunch on the way, I'll drop you off at home and you can call me later to tell me what time dinner will be ready," Lee suggested.

"That sounds like a great plan. What are you thinking? Chinese sounds good right about now," Amanda realized how hungry she really was. "Can we stop at China Garden on North Moore Street? It's not too far out of the way in Rosslyn. I love their Moo Goo Gai Pan."

"That sounds good to me. Let me just clear my desk and we are out of here until Monday morning." Lee took one look at his desk and realized Amanda had already filed everything for him. Grabbing his jacket, Lee took a few steps toward the door. "Well, what are you waiting for? I want out of here before Francine finds us and decides that little love bite requires some explaining."

"I'm sorry I did that. I don't think I knew I was doing that when I did it." Amanda blushed, remembering why.

"Amanda, I'm not complaining. I just don't want to get into our relationship with her right now," Lee said, as he was locking the office door.

Placing his hand on her back, he steered her toward the stairs, walking as quickly as he could. Once they were safely in Lee's car, they let out a sigh of relief no one stopped them on their way.

The ride to the restaurant was quiet but comfortable. Ordering their lunch to go, Amanda and Lee waited at the bar. Lee was a little surprised when Amanda asked for their meals to be bagged separately. Although it was lunch time, they didn't need to wait long and soon they were outside of Amanda's house.

As Amanda began to climb out of the car, so did Lee. She turned to face him and said, "Lee, I think I, um, I think I need a little time this afternoon to myself. I'm just going to eat, shower and take a nap. I'll call you later about dinner ok?"

Lee stopped and just looked at her. He was confused but didn't want to upset her. "Ok, ok. I'll just wait for you to call me later then," he said.

"Thanks for the ride. And lunch. Oh, would you prefer steak or chicken for dinner?" Amanda was having a hard time making eye contact with him now.

"Steak's fine. If that's what you want." The conversation was clearly awkward for the both of them.

"Steak, I'll do that. I'll call you later," and with that, she walked to the front door and inside without looking back.

_What was that all about?_ Lee was so confused.  _I hope she isn't having second thoughts about what happened last night._ As he drove away toward home, he could only hope that wasn't the case.

Inside her house, Amanda went right to the breakfast nook to eat her lunch. She wanted to invite Lee in to have lunch with her but she knew she needed to rest too and if she had invited him in, no one would be getting any rest. He was so irresistible, she didn't trust herself to keep her hands off him.

Once her lunch was finished she called her mother and the boys to check in with them. The boys didn't have much to say as they were heading out to play basketball with their cousins and some of their friends. Her mother on the other hand rambled on for almost 30 minutes about the hiking trip they went on the day before.

"Amanda, you would never believe how beautiful this park was. It is in Salem, New Hampshire so the ride was over an hour just to get there but oh my goodness Amanda. It was originally called Mystery Hill until a few years ago but now it's called America's Stonehenge. There are all these interesting stone buildings and no one can figure out who built them. The boys just loved it. Hiking all around. Reminded me of when you were younger and your father and I used to bring you hiking at Windy Run Park. Oh, you could spend all day there, just up and down through the rocks…." Dotty kept talking.

"Mother….. Mother….. Mother…." Amanda tried to interrupt her mother but of course, she just kept talking. Rubbing her head with one hand, Amanda stifled a yawn.

"Mother…. I don't mean to stop you but I had a really late night in the editing room last night and I'm pretty tired. I think I'm going to go lay down for a while," she hated lying but it wasn't completely a lie right? She was up most of the night.

"Well dear, I supposed I could tell you more about it later. The boys are heading out now so I guess I'll go out and keep an eye on them. Make sure they don't get hurt." Dotty sounded slightly dejected Amanda didn't want to talk anymore.

"Thank you Mother. I'll call you guys later. Tell the boys I love them. Bye-bye." Amanda couldn't hang up fast enough. She just wanted to take a quick shower and a long nap. Hanging up the phone, she ran upstairs before she could be interrupted again.

Amanda stood in the shower thinking of last night and everything that had happened. Yes, she was very nervous about the broken condom but knew she couldn't let that be her only consuming thought. Instead she decided she would plan something special for Lee that night. Afterall, no one was going to be home. It would be just the two of them, here, alone. After drying herself off, she pulled a t shirt and a pair of sweatpants out of her drawer and curled up on her bed. Hugging a pillow, wishing it were Lee beside her, Amanda fell asleep planning her evening.


	8. Naps, Dinner and the Truth

Lee pulled away from Amanda's house confused. So many thoughts were going through his mind. Did he do something wrong, say something?

_Was last night a mistake? Were we not ready for that step?_

The ride back to his apartment was a complete blur. Walking in the door, he tossed his keys onto the table and closed the door behind him. Looking over at the couch, he smiled. Remembering their first kiss last night. He noticed the wine glasses were still on the coffee table so he picked them up and carried them in the kitchen. Still sitting in the sink were the plates they ate their chocolate cake on. Taking a few minutes to wash them, Lee smiled again.

_Everything seemed so perfect last night, what happened? Ok, well almost perfect…._

Lee thought back to the conversations they had about Amanda and Joe, how she wanted to know how many partners he had had, and even about his uncle's advice. He didn't know how he could have changed any of that. And he was honest with her. He couldn't lie to her.

Drying his hands, he walked toward the bedroom thinking Amanda's idea of a shower and a nap sounded good. Walking through the door, he noticed the pile of her clothes now neatly folded on the chair. The towel she had folded was sitting on the desk and his clothes had been picked up and put in the laundry basket. His bed was neatly made although he didn't remember doing that either.  _She must have done that when I made coffee._

Smiling, Lee stepped into the bathroom, he stripped down and took a quick shower. Walking back into the bedroom with just the towel wrapped around his waist, he grabbed a pair of boxer shorts, put them on and sat on the edge of the bed. He set the alarm clock for 2 hours. As he put the clock back on the nightstand beside the bed he looked down to the trash can and saw the used condoms from last night.

_Three… its been a long time…._

But the broken condom worried him. Could she possibly be pregnant? Could it have happened? Lee had never thought about being a father before. He always figured he would be a bachelor but then he had never met anyone like Amanda before. She was someone special, it just took him too long to see it.

Laying back on the pillows he could still smell her, that soft vanilla scent he would recognize anywhere. Putting his hand behind his head he fell asleep, dreaming of Amanda.

Two hours later, the alarm woke him from his dreams. Shaking the sleepiness from his head he smiled as he remembered the last few moments. He was a small boy, at his childhood home, sitting with his mom on the front steps waiting for his dad to come home. It was a memory he hadn't thought about for a long time. It was the last time he felt completely loved… until now. Stretching, he thought about calling Amanda but decided he would wait for her. He didn't want to push her today, let her come to him on her own time.

Back in Arlington, Amanda was waking up from her own wonderful dream. In her dream, Lee was a full part of her family, spending time with her boys, making dinner in the kitchen with Mother. It was her perfect dream. Smiling, she reached for the phone and dialed his familiar number. Lee answered on the second ring.

"Hello?"

"Hey, how does dinner at 7 sound?" Amanda asked, not wanted to waste any time.

"Dinner at 7 sounds perfect. Should I bring the wine?" Lee smiled just hearing her voice over the phone.

"Wine would be great. We are having New York Strip so whatever you think would pair well with that. I'll leave that up to you. I'm going to run to the market for a few things so I'll see you at 7:00?" Amanda had a few ideas and wanted to make sure she had enough time to get everything in place.

"7. Amanda?" Lee asked.

"Yeah?"

"I love you" Lee smiled again, ear to ear.

"I love you too. See you at 7." Amanda hung the phone up, blushing.

Looking at the clock, Amanda made a quick decision which market she needed to go to and how much she could get done before he got there. Changing into a pair of jeans and a sweatshirt, she pulled her hair up into a ponytail, put on her sneakers and jogged down the stairs. Before running out the door, she wrote a quick list of the items she needed, grabbed her purse and keys and headed out to do her errands.

Lee hung up the phone and looked at the clock. He had a few hours to burn and more nervous energy than he knew what to do with so he decided to go for a run. Changing his clothes, he mentally mapped out the best route in the neighborhood. Tying his sneakers, he stood up, grabbed his single spare key out of the top dresser drawer and headed for the front door.

_I should give this key to Amanda._ He thought to himself. And with that, he headed out for his run.

Ninety minutes later, Amanda returned home from her trip to the market and the new lingerie shop that just opened nearby. She wasn't sure exactly what she wanted in the shop or what Lee might like the most so she settled on a light green babydoll set so sheer he could read the newspaper through it.  _I hope reading the newspaper will be the last thing on his mind,_ Amanda thought. Bringing the grocery bags into the kitchen, she grabbed the box of condoms she also purchased. She brought the lingerie bag and condoms up to her room, placed them on her bed then headed back down to the kitchen to start preparing dinner.

She preheated the oven for the baked potatoes, took the steaks out to marinate in Worcester and Montreal seasoning. As she was waiting, she mixed up chocolate mousse dessert for two, adding a few raspberries to the top.

At 6:30 Amanda went up to her bedroom to get changed. She swapped her sweatshirt for a pink sweater, freshed up her makeup and went back down to set the table. At exactly 7:00 her front door bell rang, causing her to jump. Opening the front door, Lee stood there in a striped shirt, khaki pants, carrying a bottle of wine.

"As the lady requested," Lee said, handing her the bottle.

"Red Rhone, I heard this was good." Amanda replied as she took the bottle. "Thank you." She leaned in for a quick kiss.

"I wasn't sure if you had tried that before but the shopkeeper assured me the '84 Legende Cote Du Rhone was one of the best vintages they've had in awhile."

Honestly Amanda couldn't have told him what the best vintages were but she enjoyed his appreciation for a fine wine. Walking into the kitchen, she handed him a bottle opener.

"If you can take care of opening that, dinner is ready."

Lee looked over at the table to see she had set it beautifully. She never ceased to amaze him in all the little things she did.

"Dinner smells amazing. My mouth was watering the second I walked inside."

"I hope you like it. It's a new marinade recipe I tried. I've never basted the steak in butter before but Mrs. Anderson down the street swears by it. I bumped into her at the market and she insisted it brings out every flavor so I figured it was worth a try. After all, I've seen her husband's expanding waistline so she must be doing something right." Amanda laughed.

Lee poured the wine and sat down to eat. Two or three bites in, he stopped just to stare at Amanda. If the rest of the night was as good as this steak and loaded baked potato he could die a happy man.

"Amanda, you can cook dinner for me every night if it tastes this good."

"Well, I don't think you would find the hot dogs with mac and cheese the boys seem to be favoring these days up to this standard." Amanda just smiled.

"I'm sure you would find a way to make that taste wonderful too" Lee just looked at her again. He was beginning to feel like a young boy on a date with his first crush.

The rest of their dinner conversation was mostly about Amanda's conversation with her mother earlier that day. She told him what she knew about their hiking trip and how her mother reminded her they used to hike when she was a child.

"We should plan a hiking day. You, me and the boys, a perfect way to break the ice," Lee suggested.

"You think so? I think now that we are … well… together, that would be nice."

Reaching out, he took her hand in his and leaning forward, he met her across the table for a quick kiss. Sitting back down, he didn't let go of her hand, he simply rubbed her fingers with his own.

"Don't forget to leave room for dessert too. I made chocolate mousse with raspberries."

"Amanda, you didn't… you know that's my favorite dessert. My mother used to make it for me as a child. To this day, its one of the few memories I really have of her." Lee said almost mournfully.

"Aww, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you sad. I just knew you liked it. I didn't know why." Amanda now felt bad.

"No, no, its fine. I'm glad you made it. But right now, I think my stomach needs to rest before dessert. That steak was cooked perfectly."

"Do you want me to make coffee?"

"Coffee sounds like a great ending to a great meal. Here, let me clean the table off while you start the coffee." Lee stood up and immediately began clearing their empty plates. Amanda picked up their wine glasses and placed them on the kitchen counter beside the sink. She got the coffee pot started just as Lee finished bringing the dishes into the kitchen.

"Let's let the dishes soak and while the coffee is brewing we can sit in the family room and talk." Amanda said.

Lee wasn't sure if this was good or bad. Was there something specific she wanted to talk about or did she just mean casual conversation. He was still confused about her reactions earlier he felt he was walking on eggshells.

Sitting down on the couch, Lee looked at Amanda for some kind of sign something was wrong. That maybe she wasn't happy about the turn their relationship took last night. That she was scared about the broken condom, would blame him because he had put it on, something. As soon as she sat down, she immediately looked him in the eye.

"I really really enjoyed last night. And I'm not going to lie, I'm a little nervous about what happened with the condom but I want you to know I don't blame you for anything. After all, we were both involved and well, what happened, happened."

"Amanda, you don't know how happy I am to hear you say that," Lee let out the breath he didn't realize he was holding. "Earlier today you seemed so, so, scared maybe, that I figured you were unhappy about it."

"Lee, last night was probably one of the best nights of my life. I'm a little scared, yes, about Francine or Mr. Melrose figuring it out. Or worse, Dr. Smyth. I can't believe he spotted that mark on your neck." Amanda fingered the spot just below his collar.

"Yeah, that," Lee smiled and reached up to twine his fingers with hers. He pulled her hand up to his lips and gently kissed her fingers. Looking into her eyes, he pulled her close for another kiss, this time on her lips. Amanda responded immediately, sliding her other hand up his shoulder to the back of his neck. Lee parted her lips with his tongue, swirling it around hers, tasting her.

"Do you still want that coffee?" Amanda leaned back and looked in his eyes, seeing the desire that was starting to build.

"Only if that's what you want. Amanda, if you don't want to … repeat…. Last night's activities, I'm okay with that. I don't want you to feel you have to." Lee wanted her to know she had a choice.

"How about I pour that cup of coffee for you. Then I, ah, have to run upstairs for a minute." Amanda said nonchalantly, not wanting to clue him into her surprise.

"Coffee sounds good." Lee sighed, figuring she was not ready for a repeat of the previous night. And he knew there were bathrooms upstairs so he figured that's where she was heading.

Pouring Lee's coffee, she dropped just enough half and half into the mug, just the way he liked it. Handing him his steaming mug, Amanda just said "I'll be back in a few minutes".

Lee sat down on one of the stools in the kitchen to sip his coffee while he waited for her to come back.  _I wonder what comes next?_


	9. Music, Dancing and Lingerie

*This chapter is inspired by the song Tonight I Celebrate My Love by Peabo Bryson and Roberta Flack released in 1983 and I Want To Know What Love Is by Foreigner released in 1984.*

Amanda ran up the stairs trying to decide how she was going to get Lee up there with her. She had thought about walking down the steps, wearing the new lingerie she bought but knew if that happened, they'd never make it back up to the bedroom. Moving down the hall to her bedroom, she closed the door quietly, formulating a plan.

First, she she tuned her clock radio to the soft music station, 99.3 WPLZ Magic. Mood music, check.

Next, she adjusted the lights in the room to dim on her bedside lamp. Mood lighting, check.

Then, taking the box of condoms, she took one out, put it on the bedside table, the rest of the box in the top drawer. Protection, check.

She quickly changed into the light green baby doll set, slightly cursing when she realized it included a very tiny thong, not the panties she had originally thought. Turning to look at herself in the mirror to be sure she looked ok, she let out a sigh. Although she barely filled out the top, the rest fit her body to a T. It hugged the right places and flared down and away from her ribs and stomach, coming to rest at the top of her thighs, leaving just enough to the imagination.

The lace and chiffon material is not something she would have ever bought for Joe. The light green reminded her of Lee's eyes but only when he was looking at her. Normally his eyes were a darker hazel, almost brown when he was angry. But when they were alone together, she noticed they changed into this lighter green.

Taking another deep breath, she contemplated the best way to get his attention. Walking down the hall to the top of the stairs, she called his name, "Lee?" Not hearing him answer right away, she called him again, a little louder, "Lee!"

Down in the kitchen, Lee wasn't sure if he heard Amanda or not. He thought she was calling him so he put his mug down to walk toward the first landing. "Amanda? Did you call me?"

Hearing his footsteps coming up the first set of steps Amanda retreated a few steps back into the hall so he wouldn't see her right away. "Lee, can you… I can't reach something" She was thinking fast, trying to get him up the stairs without giving away her surprise.

"Amanda, what are you doing? What are you trying to get? Hang on…" Lee walked up the steps, feeling slightly hesitant. He had only been upstairs in the King household a handful of times in the 3 years he had known her. Most of their interactions were in the kitchen or family room.

"It's in my closet, I just can't…" Amanda purposefully let her voice trail off. Standing inside her room, away from the door where he wouldn't see her right away, she waited.

"Amanda, what are you…" Lee walked into her room and stopped short, his breath taken away by the scene before him. "Wow," he let out.

Amanda stood there, nervously looking at him. She watched him sweep his eyes over her, his eyes immediately turning green. Taking two steps toward him, she reached out her hand and asked, "Would you care to dance?"

Lee just smiled at her. "Would I care to dance? Yes, yes I would." He placed his hand in hers, gently wrapping the other around her tiny waist. From the radio they heard the introduction music and the lyrics began, almost on cue.

Tonight, I celebrate my love for you

It seems the natural thing to do.

Tonight no one's gonna find us

We'll leave the world behind us.

When I make love to you.

"Amanda, " Lee looked at her and smiled again. "This is definitely not what I thought would happen tonight, not after this morning. You look …. Wow, there are no words to describe how you look right now."

Amanda closed her eyes just a little, slightly embarrassed at his comment. No one, not even Joe, had said that to her before. Of course, she never did anything like this for Joe either.

Raising her chin up to look him in the eye, she saw that twinkle. Sliding her hands up his chest, she brought them around his neck and leaned up to kiss him. "We don't need words, do we?" she whispered against his lips.

Lee just shook his head slightly then with a small growl he descended upon her mouth, wanting to finish what they started on the couch downstairs a few minutes before. The kiss lasted for several minutes leaving them both breathless.

Amanda had already committed to herself that she wanted to take the lead tonight. So she began kissing his cheek, chin, moving down his neck to the open collar of his shirt. Slowly unbuttoning it, she kissed her way down his chest with each button. She stopped about halfway to pull it out of his pants before continuing, remembering how last night she almost knocked him over. Lee just stood there, his hands on her arms, head back, thinking he was the luckiest man alive at that exact moment.

Once she had finished unbuttoning his shirt, he made quick work of pulling it off for her, tossing it to the side. She was on her knees in front of him, unbuckling his belt, unbuttoning his pants. Sliding the zipper down very slowly, she looked up at him through shaded eyelashes. He was watching her, his face completely relaxed, eyes green, twinkling still.

Before pulling his pants over his hips she tapped his ankle to remove his shoes. Sitting back on her heels, she slid his pants down, and he stepped out of them for her. She tossed them aside, then proceeded to remove his socks for him as well. Joe always left his socks on and that bothered her every time. Moving back up to rub her hands up his stomach and chest, bringing them back up around his neck to kiss him again.

The song on the radio had changed as Amanda had taken her time undressing Lee. As they stood together, his arms back around her waist, hers around his neck they began to sway to the music again.

In my life, there's been heartache and pain

I don't know if I can face it again

Can't stop now, I've traveled so far

To change this lonely life.

I wanna know what love is

I want you to show me

I wanna feel what love is

I know you can show me.

"Lee, I…" Amanda started.

"Shhhhhh" he said. Leaning down to kiss her again, he slid his hands down her back, across the bare skin of her butt. "I can't believe you are wearing this."

"Hopefully not for much longer…." Amanda joked.

"No, I want you to leave it on. We can, um, make it a challenge. Work around it," Lee said as he began kissing her neck and shoulder.

Amanda remembering she wanted to be in charge, gently pushed him back toward the bed. Stopping just before he sat down, she ran her hands down his chest again, this time to the waistband of his boxer shorts. He was beginning to look uncomfortable, his erection straining the material. I don't know if I'll get used to seeing that. Smiling, she reached her hand inside to wrap her fingers around him.

Lee took in a sharp breath. She had no idea the power she had over him right now. Or maybe she did. Either way, tonight was going much better than he thought it would just a few hours ago.

Kneeling back down again in front of him, Amanda proceeded to remove his boxer shorts as slowly as she could. She wanted to extend this foreplay as much as she could remembering last night and how incredible he made her feel. She caressed his legs, as gently as she could before moving to her target. With just one finger, she traced a lazy pattern down his stomach, around the base of his now throbbing member, up the tip and back down the shaft again.

Lee stood there, taking shallow breaths through his teeth, clenching his jaw. He was holding back dragging her up his body and tossing her on the bed. "My god, woman, what are you doing to me today?"

"Shhhh" now it was Amanda's turn to stop him. Taking him in her mouth again, she wrapped her hand around his shaft to hold him still while she spent the next few minutes licking and teasing him. Lee's hands were now buried in her hair, his breathing becoming more and more ragged.

"Amanda, I'm not going to last much longer if you keep that up," he could barely get the words out.

"Well, I want to be sure we keep something else up…." she teased, slowly letting go of him. Coming up to stand in front of him again, she wrapped her arms around his neck and looked at him. She could see his desire written all over his face.

Before she could do anything else, Lee spun her around to land on the bed behind him. She let out a startled scream followed by laughter. "You find this funny?" he said, laughing with her. "Well, we'll see about that.." he said as he began to tickle her ribs.

Amanda immediately tried to scramble away from him. She was extremely ticklish and quickly realized she was outmatched with him. On the defense, she tried to tickle him back but his onslaught only incapacitated her. Seeing he had the upper hand, he changed his tactics. Tickles quickly became kisses on her neck, gentle nips on her skin. Instead of tickling he was now caressing her hip and bare butt cheek.

Amanda just sighed, fully enjoying his hands on her skin, his lips on her. Lee's lips found hers again and the battle over tongues quickly began. Lee was determined to take control over the rest of their evening so he began a slow, sensual path down her neck to her breasts. He held them through the thin material, seeing her nipple peak through. Capturing it in his mouth through the material, Amanda gasped, the sensation amazing. Not wanting to shy away from any sensation, Lee moved to her other breast and closed his mouth around that tightening nipple. Amanda arched into his arms. Her hands were constantly moving, touching him, rubbing his arms, his shoulders, his back.

Lee's hands moved further down her body to her now very wet, very hot center. Touching her through the thin barrier caused her to move her hips more than she intended. She was so ready for him. Lee had to make a quick decision what to do about what she was wearing. He loved how she looked in it and wanted to see her in it again so instead of his first instinct to rip the thong off her, he quickly slid it down her legs and tossed it off the bed. Reaching across her, he grabbed the condom she had left on the bedside table.

"Good thing you remembered because I wasn't prepared for…. This….." Lee said appreciatively. Tearing open the package, Lee quickly unrolled it on his hard throbbing member. Remembering the previous night, Lee found Amanda's hand and held it as he slipped inside her. Immediately she gripped his hand as she tilted her hips forward and wrapped her legs around him. This simple move caused a chain reaction neither one expected.

As Lee began to move, almost immediately Amanda felt the bundle of energy beginning to built. Within just a few minutes, she was pushed over the edge. Holding onto him tightly she could barely breath, enjoying the ride. Lee stilled for a moment, wanting his own pleasure to hold out just a little longer. He took that time to nibble, suckle and hold her, leaving his own marks on her pale skin just about her breast.

When her breathing returned to somewhat normal, he began to move again. Still holding one hand tightly, Amanda moved her other hand to his back. Tilting her hips just a bit, he moved faster, she responded with another gasp, raking her nails down his back. The fire, electricity began to build again, faster this time. Lee was moving faster, thrusting his hips harder than before. He was close but he knew she was even closer by the sounds she was making, and how she was again squeezing his hand.

"Lee…. I …. sooo …. Close….. Soooo clooooseeee…." was all he heard as she could barely control her own hips, tilting up to meet his stroke for quick stroke. Still holding her hand, Lee pushed up off his elbows for a different angle and from here it was just a few short strokes before she was pushed over the edge again. Lee fell, right behind her, one hot explosion after another.

Panting, sweating, holding each other tight, they stayed there, trying to catch their breath. "I love you Amanda King" Lee whispered in her ear between breaths.

"I love you, Lee Stetson" she whispered back.

After a few minutes, they began to regain control, Lee held onto the condom as they separated. Sliding it off, he took a quick look. "Nope, not this time," he said as he tossed it in the trash smiling.


	10. Honesty

Laying together, simply holding each other, Amanda was the first one to speak. "Lee, that was, um, not what I was expecting," she whispered.

Looking down at her, Lee was slightly confused. "Amanda. What… Not what you were expecting?"

Amanda looked up at him, her fingers on his chest moving in slow circles. "I just… I mean…. Last night was wonderful. I wasn't sure if tonight would be the same."

"Amanda, why would you think that? Wearing that? And all this?" Lee just smiled, waving his hand around to emphasis his point. "And wearing that…" he repeated.

"I just thought maybe last night was so good because it was our first night. The anticipation of it, my imagination, I don't know. I didn't expect tonight to just as good," she dropped her eyes to follow her fingers, almost embarrassed to look him in the eye, reminding herself again how sexually inferior she felt.

"Hey," Lee sat up, drawing her up to a sitting position so he could look at her face, "it should always be that good, and if I have any say in it, it will be. Or better. Amanda, I'm no expert in love, I'll admit that, but I do know I love you and I will show you with everything I have and everything I am."

Amanda reached up to touch his face, to trace the line of his jaw with her fingers. She hated feeling so inexperienced in this. After all, she was the one who had been married before, shouldn't she understand this feeling better than the Agency playboy in front of her. But yet, this was something completely different. She loved him in ways she couldn't put into words. But, she realized, she did owe him an explanation about her panic over the broken condom. He deserved the truth.

"Lee, I, um, I owe you…" she started.

"Owe me? Amanda, you don't owe me anything. " Lee couldn't understand what she was talking about.

"No, I need to explain. About last night. The broken condom…" Amanda was having a hard time making eye contact again.

"A-man-da, I told you, we will figure it out. Hey, together, we will wait this out. Don't worry," he flashed his dimpled smile at her. He didn't want anything to dampen the mood for the rest of the night.

"Lee, I know, together, but I need you to understand why I panicked." Amanda hated when he tried to ignore conversations.

"Ok, ok, I'll bite. Why did you panic last night over the broken condom?" Lee almost rolled his eyes but thought better of it.

"Did you ever wonder why I went to college, only to get married right after? And why Joe continued his law degree and we had Phillip so soon?" Amanda began.

"I just thought it was one of those things. You know, young love, get married, Joe wanted to be the man to provide for the family, wife stays home, takes care of the kiddos," Lee answered nonchalantly.

"Joe? The man to…" Amanda lightly punched his arm. "He wanted to save the world, not stay home and take care of his family. Our original plan, before we got married, was I would get a job as an English teacher and he would complete his law degree. Then he was going to get a job at a local law firm to gain some experience before moving on to International Law."

"So what happened? What changed the grand plan?" Lee had an inkling he knew but wanted to hear her tell him.

"Well, about 2 weeks before we got married, we had gone to a graduation party for one of Joe's friends. We had a good time, too good I guess. We were both drinking and well I couldn't tell you how we actually made it to my parents house. They were in Vermont, visiting, so Joe suggested we… took advantage of things." Amanda was now looking down at her own hands, almost ashamed about what she was going to tell him.

"Amanda, he didn't…" Lee didn't even want to finish his sentence.

"No, no, he didn't force me to do anything. I mean, we were getting married in 2 weeks so we were practically married right? So I let my guard down and well, one thing led to another and well, after it was over, Joe told me he was sorry. I thought he was sorry about what we had just done, that he regretted us. But then he showed me… the broken condom."

"Oh Amanda…. Phillip…." Lee put his hands on her arms, pulling her close.

"Lee, I never told anyone. Not even Mother. Only Joe and I knew the truth. Good thing Phillip was stubborn and came almost 10 days late. No one even guessed. The timing was close enough. Mother loved the idea of her first grandson being conceived on our honeymoon, if not our wedding night," Amanda said all in one breath. She sighed, "It happened so fast, so easy the first time, I just don't want for us. I want more for us. More time to be together. More time for the boys to get to know you. I don't want you to feel like we have to rush into anything because I'm…." she trailed off again.

"Amanda, oh Amanda. I think we are getting a little ahead of ourselves. Let's think of this as a case. Facts first: We have a broken condom on the floor. Found after it was stepped on," Lee began, trying to appeal to her rational side.

"Right, on the floor, stepped on." Amanda repeated.

"Next we have your cycle. Now is there a possibility that day 13 is NOT the actual day you can get pregnant?"

"Well, if I remember when we were trying to get pregnant with Jamie we were told anywhere from the 10th to the 17th day I COULD possibly get pregnant, so I guess, yes, day 13 might not be THE day but it's in the range," Amanda added.

"Ok so no solid proof it broke during our 'activities' and no solid proof day 13 was THE day. If this was a case, what would Billy tell you?" Lee asked.

"Well, he would probably tell me it's all circumstancial evidence and to come back when I had solid proof," she sighed.

"Exactly. So what do we need to do to get solid proof?" Lee questioned again, tilting his head, eyebrow raised.

"Well, in this case, we need to wait an allotted amount of time, without panicking, for any signs," Amanda admitted.

"Right, no panicking, just go on living our lives, working normally until we have confirmation. Call this a lesson in patience," Lee tried to calm her again.

"Lee, I'm not very patient. You, of all people, should know that," Amanda laughed.

"Ok, now let's change this lesson to one in observation, what signs would you look for?" Lee prompted.

Amanda was beginning to feel restless, so she got off the bed to pace. "Well, when I was pregnant with the boys in the very beginning, there was breast tenderness, I was tired all the time, the obvious, I missed my period, oh the nausea. The nausea was horrible for the first few weeks with both of them."

Lee just sat there on her bed, watching, smiling. Amanda continued to pace back in forth at the end of the bed, seemingly unaware she was still wearing nothing but the light green baby doll top. Amanda stopped pacing and looked at him.

"What are you smiling at?" she looked at him, eyebrow raised, trying to figure out what might be going on in his mind.

"You," Lee replied, still smiling.

Amanda just shook her head. "Me? Alright, Scarecrow, spill it!"

"Spill what? Amanda, " Lee started to get off the bed to stand with her. "I was just appreciating how you look, pacing in just this beautiful piece of …." Lee wasn't even sure what he wanted to call it.

Amanda stopped and looked down realizing what he was looking at. A blush crept up her neck and face. She wasn't used to wearing lingerie for anyone and suddenly she felt very exposed. Not sure what she should do, she simply stepped backward, her eyes down, trying not to make direct eye contact.

"Amanda, look at me," Lee put his fingers on her chin, directing her face upward toward his. "You are the most beautiful woman I know," he said, leaning forward to kiss her gently.

Amanda just sighed into his mouth. She wasn't sure what to do now, so she wrapped her arms around Lee's neck and kissed him back.

"Hmmmm," Lee murmurred. "How about we take a break from this and go finish our coffee? And if I remember correctly you mentioned something earlier about chocolate mousse with raspberries?"

"I think we need to get dressed to go back downstairs. Just in case anyone should show up. After all, this is my house and you never know who's just going to drop in," Amanda pointed out.

"You are completely right about that one," Lee shook his head laughing.

They spent the next few minutes finding various pieces of Lee's clothes tossed around the room, laughing each time another one was found. Once dressed, Lee back in his button down shirt and pants, Amanda in her jeans and sweater, with a simple camisole instead of a bra underneath, Lee followed Amanda back down to the kitchen.

Amanda poured them each a new cup of coffee, got the mousse out of the fridge and carried them to the table. Lee grabbed spoons and napkins and sat across from her as he had been during dinner.

"So, tell me why chocolate mousse with raspberries is your favorite dessert," Amanda asked.

"Because of my mother," Lee began….


	11. Memories

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **** This is my thoughts into what triggered the nightmares he was having and why he requested his parents file from the CIA. ****

 

"Amanda, I haven't talked about my parents much to anyone," Lee said. "I don't have a lot of memories of them, mostly jumbled ideas, certain smells will remind me of them. But this, chocolate mousse. One of my clearest memories of my mother telling me the story of how on one of their first dates my father took her to the fanciest French restaurant and for dessert she had chocolate mousse with raspberries for the first time."

"Aw, I know that must have meant an awful lot to her. Just after World War II, England spent a lot of time recovering. A nice restaurant like that must have been hard to find," Amanda said.

"You know, to be honest, I'm not sure where that restaurant was. I don't remember my mother ever saying. But then again, I was a little boy, I was probably too interested in climbing that big tree outside of our house, or playing ball," Lee shook his head.

"Do you remember much of your dad?" Amanda asked, not wanting to pry but she was interested in learning more about what happened to them.

"I remember his voice, deep, loud, commanding I guess you could say. And the pipe he used. He didn't smoke it a lot around me but he would hold it in his hand, just hold it…." Lee's voice trailed off. He was looking down at his own hands, trying to imagine what it looked like, the shape and size of his father's pipe.

Amanda reached across the table to hold his hand in hers. She could see the emotional struggle he was beginning to have, thinking about the parents that had been gone for so many years. She knew this wasn't easy for him.

"How long has it been?" She asked softly.

"Since they died? Well, I was only 5, just after my 5th birthday, when the accident occurred. From there I went to live with my grandmother until I was 7 then I was introduced to the Colonel and spent the next part of my life I guess you could say as an Army Brat," Lee explained.

"That must have been really hard on you. Do you miss them?" Again, Amanda didn't want to pry but Lee just seemed like he needed to talk about it.

"Miss them? Yeah, uh, sometimes more than others. I have their picture on the table at home near the couch? I think you've seen it. The Colonel keeps telling me the older I get, the more I look like my dad. I'm still trying to figure out if that's a good thing," Lee laughed.

"Well, he must have been a handsome man then," Amanda smiled, rubbing his hand with her thumb.

"Hey, enough about that. Dessert was just as delicious as dinner. Maybe we could….." Lee began when the doorbell rang.

Looking at each other, slightly confused, Amanda said, "I wonder who that could be this time of night." Getting up from the table, Amanda went to the front door to see who it was. Looking out the window as she unlocked the door she said, "It's Joe. I hope nothing's wrong."

Lee shook his head to himself.  _Figures, it's Joe._ He decided to move closer to the door as well.

"Joe, hi, everything ok?" Amanda said, opening the door for him.

"Amanda, hi, yeah. I was just…. " Joe stopped when he saw Lee standing in the kitchen. "Lee, I didn't expect to see you here this late. I'm not interrupting anything…"

Lee decided this could go one of two ways. He chose the easy one. "No, not at all. Amanda and I were just going over a case. It might be a long night for me, so ah… you want a cup of coffee?" Lee looked right at Amanda as he said this, hoping she would get drift.

"Yeah, it's been a tough confusing case we've been working on. Last night was longgg, very very long. I'm hoping tonight is a little easier," she babbled.

Joe looked at Amanda, then Lee. He sensed he may have interrupted something but he couldn't put his finger on it. "No, no. Coffee now would keep me awake for the rest of the night. I was just, ah, I was just stopping by to see if you had heard from the boys at all. I forgot when they said they would be back from…." Joe stopped, trying to remember where they went. He was distracted still by Lee's presence at Amanda's house so late.

"Vermont, Joe, they went to Vermont with Mother to see my cousins and their kids. I talked to Mother earlier today. She said they went hiking and the boys were having a great time. They will be home Sunday afternoon. Their train gets in around 1:00 pm," Amanda was now annoyed Joe couldn't remember where the boys had gone for the week.

"Vermont. That's right. They did tell me. Or maybe you told me. In any case, I was just wondering. I was thinking of seeing if the boys wanted to go to a game or something this weekend but it doesn't sound like it would be good timing. I'll check in with them during the week maybe and see if there is another day they'd like to go," Joe felt like a jerk, he couldn't even remember where his sons' went on vacation. "I've got to, ah, I should get going and let you two get back to … work. Lee."

Amanda stood at the door, holding it open for him. "Thanks sweetheart. I'll tell the boys you came by and to call you as soon as they get home." She gave him a quick hug as he was leaving. "Drive safe. Bye-bye" She closed the door behind him as he left, just shaking her head.

Lee could tell her mood was now completely shifted. Looking at her, she no longer had that light, sexy air to her. Now she was almost brooding, angry. "Amanda, I was just thinking, maybe we should call it a night ourselves. Get some rest. I don't think either of us slept much last night," Lee put his arms around her.

"I'm sorry but that man just infuriates me sometimes. I guess you're right. I am tired now that I think about it. You don't mind?" Amanda looked up at him, searching his face for any sign of disappointment.

"No, not at all. I'm thinking a good night's rest is good for both of us and honestly, if I stay any longer, you know, we won't be resting much," Lee smiled and winked at her.

"I'd offer for you to stay here but, I, ah, think that shiny sports car of yours in my driveway all night might draw some attention from my neighbors," Amanda had to laugh. If Lee thought her mother was bad, he hadn't met Mrs. Johansen from down the street.

Putting his arms around her he said, "I know, I know. Hopefully soon we can change that but for tonight," Lee stopped to give her a quick kiss, "I will take a kiss to hold me until tomorrow. Breakfast?"

Amanda looked up at him. He was so understanding and loving. "Breakfast, sure, my place or yours?" she asked.

Pulling her closer, Lee leaned in close to her lips, "If that was the case, it wouldn't be breakfast by the time we are done." He punctuated his comment with a long, slow kiss.

"Wow," was Amanda's only reply.

"So how about that little greasy spoon place near my place. They have some great omelets and homefries…." Lee suggested smiling.

"What time?" Amanda was laughing. She wasn't sure how one minute she could be so angry with Joe and laughing the next with Lee.

"How about 9:30? That way I can swing by the office, make sure Dr. Smyth doesn't have anything else up his sleeve," Lee suggested.

Pulling him down for one more kiss, Amanda struggled with the idea of asking him to stay anyway.  _Who cares what the neighbors think!_

Lee sensed what she was thinking. Separating himself, he held her hand just a second longer as he opened the front door. "9:30… See you then." And with that he let go and walked out to his car.

Amanda stayed there, watching him back out of the driveway and drive away until she could no longer see his tail lights.


	12. Weekend Lost

Lee drove home from Amanda's thinking about his parents. He usually didn't dwell on the past, especially his parents but Amanda brought something out of him. Maybe it was her own maternal instinct to protect him, or just being in her home, or maybe because she made that dessert.

He couldn't put his finger on exactly why, but all he could think about was the last memory he had of them. Sitting with his mother, on the front stairs of their home, waiting for his dad's car to pull up. Seeing him get out of the car, on the walkway, getting closer to the steps saying "Daddy's home." He could remember his mom getting up, meeting him halfway and hugging him. He didn't need to see their faces to know how much they loved each other. He could feel it. Something inside told him, they were meant to be together.

Walking into his building, he couldn't help but smile. He left Amanda's house just a few minutes before, feeling that same feeling, that he and Amanda were meant to be together. It wasn't something he could explain, he couldn't put the feeling into words, but he knew it existed.

Tossing his keys on the table, he glanced at his answering machine to see the light blinking. He had a message from Billy telling him to stop by the Agency in the morning for a few minutes. No explanation, just an order.

"Good thing I didn't stay at Amanda's then," he said out loud. Billy would have been angry with him had he not gotten that message.

Lee headed into the bathroom to brush his teeth and get changed for bed. Walking back through his apartment, he did a quick sweep, lights off, doors locked, windows checked. Stopping by the couch, he picked up the picture of his parents.  _When was the last time I looked at this._ Lee couldn't remember. Taking the picture with him to his bedroom, he laid down in bed, still looking at black and white picture. He could see the resemblance in his father's face, his mother's light eyes, and as he looked at the two of them, he felt very vulnerable. It was if he was that 5 year old boy again. Shaking his head, he put the picture on the nightstand beside his bed. Laying there, with Amanda's faint scent still lingering, he fell asleep. It wasn't long before the nightmares began.

Lee was that little boy of 5, running through the hallway of his childhood home, calling for his Mom and Dad. Something or someone was chasing him, in his mind, it was a monster. He just kept calling his parents, trying a locked door, asking them to let him in as the monster chased him. Over and over, another door, another hallway. Calling and calling but no one answered, the monster getting closer. Lee snapped awake, drenched in sweat, shaking. Looking over at the clock, it was still very early. Getting up, he poured himself a shot of brandy to calm his nerves.

Still shaken, he wanted to call Amanda but knew if he woke her at this time of night it would frighten her. Instead, he went back to bed. He rolled onto his side, grabbing the pillow she had slept on last night. Inhaling, he could smell her. It comforted him, if only for a few minutes. His mind settled down enough for him to relax and go back to sleep, the monster at bay for the moment.

Early Saturday morning, Lee woke up, showered and headed to the Agency to see what Billy needed. It was unlike him to leave him a message with no information. The office was quiet, a skeleton crew mostly at that time of morning. Billy was in his office, sipping his coffee, scowling at the pile of reports in front of him. Hearing the knock on his office door, he yelled, "Enter". Lee walked in, hesitantly, already sensing the tension in the room. "Morning Billy," he said quietly, hoping he wasn't the cause of Billy's nasty mood.

"Scarecrow, close that door," Billy commanded.

Lee stepped into his office, closing the door behind him, nervously looking at Billy.

"I thought I made myself very clear yesterday that those reports needed to be airtight. No holes, nothing for Dr. Smyth to question anything," Billy practically barked at him.

"They were. Francine, Amanda and I went over them with a fine tooth comb. Billy, there is nothing in there that should raise any flags with anyone," Lee insisted, running his hand through his hair nervously.

"Well, Dr. Smyth seems to think differently. He claims, and I quote 'Tell Scarecrow I want to know everything. Where he got the money, weapons, to run his little scam under our noses. I want no secrets.' So, would you like to share this lovely little piece of information or do I need to put you on suspension until you do?!" Billy hated to give him an ultimatum like this but his job was on the line for this one.

"Billy, you know I can't do that! I'd be giving up half my family if I did that. Come on. Every agent has life insurance hidden somewhere, or at least every good agent I know does. I bet you still have yours too," Lee looked at him. "Do you really want to put more people's lives at risk by giving them up like that?"

"Then lie to him, I don't care, tell him something, anything, just to get him off your back. I don't need him breathing down our necks each time you break a tiny rule somewhere," Billy was frustrated. He was torn between keeping his friend Lee safe, maintaining order with Scarecrow and keeping Dr. Smyth happy so he would leave them alone.

"What if, what if I wrote a separate report just about that. Amanda didn't know anything about it anyway. They followed my first contact so I could, I could just use that. That puppet Smyth doesn't need to know anything else," Lee was pacing as he talked.  _Amanda does the same thing when she's thinking._ Suppressing a smile, Lee continued, "I'll work on it this afternoon and drop it off first thing Monday morning." Glancing up at the clock in Billy's office he realized it was almost 9 o'clock.

"He wants it in the hour," Billy simply stated.

"An hour? Are you kidding me? Billy I can't…. you know…. Dammit… Come on," Lee was beginning to get angry now. Why did it seem like every time he and Amanda made plans something had to interrupt them. Except two nights ago. It was spontaneous, they didn't plan it, dinner was a last minute idea and well, everything that happened after…. Just thinking about the last few evening, Lee began to calm down. "Ok, ok…. Look, I'm supposed to meet Amanda in 30 minutes, can you tell that …."

"Scarecrow!" Billy stopped him before he said anything he might regret.

"Can you tell Dr. Smyth I will have the full report done later this afternoon? Billy, please. After all, it is still supposed to be a mandatory time off." Lee was practically pleading with him.

"All right, all right. I'll see what I can do to hold him off for a few hours, but if that report isn't completed today I can't guarantee if Dr. Smyth will hold the Internal Dogs off you two," Billy could see on Lee's face his time with Amanda was important. "Go. I'll call Dr. Smyth now but be back here ASAP! And that's an order Scarecrow!"

"Thanks Billy, I owe you one," Lee smiled as he practically ran out of the door.

"You're going to owe me a lot more than that if you don't come back," Billy tossed out as Lee made a beeline through the bullpen toward the elevator. Smiling, he thought,  _I'm glad those two are finally figuring it out. Lee needs Amanda. And I have a feeling, they are going to be very very good for each other._

Rushing out of the elevator, Lee almost knocked Mrs. Marston over. "Scarecrow, are you in a rush?" she asked, startled.

"You look lovely as always, Mrs. Marston," he smiled at her as he took the stairs to the Q bureau 2 by 2. Unlocking the door, Lee went to his desk and turned on his computer. Looking at the clock he had 5 minutes before he had to leave to meet Amanda.

His parents were still on his mind so he had decided on his way to the Agency this morning he was going to put in a request for the files for the investigation on their deaths. Fighting through the CIA database request form, Lee filled in the blanks on the computer, hit submit and turned off the computer.  _Betcha Amanda would have done it in half the time for me if I asked._

Looking at the clock again, he realized he was now late. "C'est la vie," he declared as he locked the door to Q bureau and headed back down to his car. Driving to the diner, traffic was light and he was only a few minutes late by the time he got there. Amanda was waiting for him at a table in the back.

"Hi, sorry I'm late," Lee leaned down to kiss her quickly.

Amanda smiled, "That's usually my line. Everything okay?"

"Yeah, yeah, I have to finish another report for Dr. Smyth after breakfast. Apparently he wants detailed information about my insurance policy, where it was, how much, that kind of thing. That man really needs a ….." Lee began but Amanda cut him off.

"Lee," she warned. "You know he's probably just trying to be thorough. I think deep down he cares about his agents. He just doesn't know how to show it. Look at Billy. One minute he's yelling at you and the next he's patting you on the back, offering you a drink. Come on, just relax. We can have a nice breakfast together," she tried to calm him. Patting the top of his hand as it rested on the table seemed to relax him just a little.

"I know, I know. You're right. But I really wanted to spend more time together today. After all, your mother and the boys will be home tomorrow and then our time is going to be limited again," Lee said, almost sadly.

"Well, we knew this time would come. We just have to make the best of it. Now let's order, I'm starving," Amanda was trying to be rational but she felt it too. Now that her mother and the boys would be home, her daily routine would be hectic once again. Spending the night again at his place would be more difficult without lying to her mother, at least for a while.

"Well, I told you last night, their omelets are delicious," Lee reminded her.

The next hour was spent eating and chatting about the boys upcoming events, practices, school obligations and how Dotty had just started flying lessons. They made a friendly bet - the real reason was Captain Kurt, not learning how to fly.

"Amanda, I hate to just leave now but if I don't get back there, Billy is going to hand me my…" Lee hated this part.

"I know, I know. Well, I'm just going to stop at the market, then head home, do some cleaning before mother and the boys get there. I can only imagine the laundry they are going to have," Amanda sighed.

"I'll, ah, I'll call you later?" Lee stood up to give her a quick kiss before leaving.

"Sure, I'd like that," Amanda smiled.

Lee paid the check and together they walked out to their cars. He didn't dare kiss her outside, too many eyes could see them. So instead he walked her to her car, helped her in and patted her hand, hoping she understood. After she pulled out of the parking lot, he followed suit, turning the opposite way, back toward the agency.

Back in the Q Bureau, Lee did his best to write the report Dr. Smyth insisted on. He found it difficult to give enough detail without giving away any secrets. For the next few hours he wrote, rewrote and wrote again until it made sense. He was frustrated, but he couldn't put his finger on the exact reason. Bringing it down to Billy's office he dropped it on his desk without saying a word. Billy nodded, "Now go home, you look like you need some sleep."

_Maybe he's right. Maybe that's all I need._ Lee didn't realize but it was after 7:00 pm by the time he finished. He headed home, wishing he was heading to Amanda's.

Once in his apartment, he called her immediately. He smiled as soon as he heard her voice on the phone, "Hi."

"Hi yourself. That must have been some report. Are you just finishing up?" Amanda was a little disappointed it took him so long to write it.

"Yeah, I just got home. Hopefully Dr. Smyth will accept it without any complaints. I'm wiped. I think writing those damn reports tires me more out than a night with you," he tried to keep the conversation light.

"Haha Stetson, very funny. No, I'm not writing your reports for you any more. You need to build more stamina for those," Amanda joked back.

"Very funny. What time are you picking everyone up tomorrow?" Lee was trying to figure out if they could squeeze in some time together.

"Mother called this afternoon and they are getting on an earlier train. A new schedule or something. They will be at the station at 10:30," Amanda said, disappointment clearly in her voice.

"Oh, well, that's good. I know you miss them," Lee answered quietly.

"And I miss you too," Amanda replied.

"Really?" Lee smiled.

"Really."

"I could come over now…" Lee suggested.

"You sound like you need some rest, Scarecrow. I'll call you in the morning," Amanda chided him. Sometimes he needed mothering.

"Are you sure? It's no trouble…" He was trying anyway.

"I'm sure. Get some rest…" Amanda was trying to be firm but what she really wanted was a repeat of the last few nights also.

"Ok, ok, talk to you tomorrow," and without thinking Lee hung up the phone.

The rest of his evening was uneventful. Lee took a quick shower, made himself a sandwich, got a beer and brought everything to the living room to watch the game. He didn't even realize he had fallen asleep on the couch…. Until the nightmare began again and he woke up, screaming.


	13. Back to the Routine

Waking up on the couch, Lee was breathing heavy, confused. "Mom? Dad?" his voice was barely a whisper. Realizing where he was, Lee sat up, putting his hands on his head, he ran his fingers through his hair. He was trying to settle himself, trying to get his heart rate back to normal. What he really wanted to do was call Amanda but looking at the clock, it was only 1:30 am. She would be asleep and he if he woke her, she would be worried.

Standing up, he picked up the remnants of his dinner, places the dishes in the sink, he walked back to his bedroom. He saw her pile of folded clothes still on the chair in the corner of the room. Walking over, he picked up her blouse that she had been wearing, holding it to his face, he inhaled. Almost immediately, he calmed down. Just the smell of Amanda had that effect on him. Taking her blouse with him to his bed, he held onto it as he laid down on the pillows. Rolling over onto his side, much as he had done the previous night, he fell asleep, holding her blouse, dreaming of Amanda.

Sunday morning, Amanda woke early, missing Lee. She wanted to call him but knew he was probably sleeping in. He seemed off last night when she hung up with him. Not his usual self, or at least not the Lee she had seen the last few days. Something was bothering him, she knew it, sensed it. She just wished she knew what it was.  _When he's ready, he'll tell me._ Amanda had to believe that.

Getting up, she went downstairs to make a quick breakfast before heading to the train station. She wasn't sure what parking was going to look like on a Sunday so she wanted to make sure she had plenty of time. Just as she was getting ready to leave, the phone rang.

"Hello?" Amanda answered cheerily.

"Hey, I caught you. I was hoping I would," Lee's voice came through the receiver.

"Hi, I'm glad you did. I was missing you. Did you sleep ok?" Amanda sensed something was wrong. She couldn't put her finger on it but something wasn't right.

"Um, yeah, ok I guess. I miss you too. I meant to tell you yesterday, you left your clothes here the other night. They were folded on the chair. I wonder who did that, hmmm?" Lee tried to keep the conversation light trying to mask his need to simply hear her voice, to calm him. He had just woken up from the nightmare again, not sure why it was happening. He hasn't had this dream since he was a kid, when he was first sent to be with the Colonel.

"I forgot them, didn't I. I think I was distracted the last time I was at your apartment. Well, I can swing by after work Monday and get them if that's ok… Wait, no, Jamie has an orthodontist appointment. How about Tuesday morning before work?" Amanda's brain was in overdrive counting the hours until she could see him outside of the office.

"Or, I could sneak them over to your house tonight. Meet you in our favorite spot, in the gazebo," Lee smiled, trying to figure out a way to see her today.

"As tempting as that sounds, Mother may not let me sneak outside for even a few minutes." Laughing, Amanda continued, "I feel like one of the boys, trying to get away with something."

"I know, I know, I just… Amanda, I just need to see you. I need to hold you. I can't explain why, it's just, I just... need… you," Lee was having a real hard time keeping it under control. He was exhausted, sleep only came in fits and starts for the rest of the night. The only time he was calm was when he thought of her, when he could smell her still in his room, on her blouse.

Amanda got quiet. She knew something wasn't right. Something WAS bothering him.

"Do you want to talk about it?" she asked. She glanced at the clock and made a face. It was almost 9:00. Mother and the boys were going to be at the train station at 10:30 which only left her about 15 minutes of extra time.

"No, no you need to get to the station. You will never hear the end of it if you are late," Lee could almost picture her face, looking at the clock.

"Well, we should be home by noon. If you need to talk, call me. The boys will need to shower and I'm sure Mother will want to take a long bubble bath to unwind. You know how she loves her bubble baths with a good book," Amanda hated to have to choose between picking up her family and Lee.

"I will, I promise," Lee said, not very convincingly. "You go, drive safe."

"Lee?" Amanda started when she heard the phone click and the line went dead. She debated calling him back but knew if he needed to talk, he would come to her, or at least she hoped he would. Hanging up the phone, she grabbed her purse and keys and ran out the door.

The rest of her day was spent running around, doing laundry and refereeing the boys as they tried to avoid doing their homework by fighting with each other. Dotty was no surprise as she walked in the house and declared, "I need a long bath with my new book. Amanda, I love the boys, but the next time I tell you I want to take a 14 hour train ride with the boys, please remind me of today."

"I know, Mother, I tried to warn you when you booked this trip, but you insisted it would be fine. You even said 'The boys will love it, lots to see, we can have time bonding'." Amanda just shook her head.

"Amanda, darling, we had a wonderful time bonding. But, I forgot how horrible riding in those coach cars can be. Maybe once I have my pilot's license we can just fly there. Just a few short hours." Dotty replied.

"And how is Captain Curt. Did he miss your lessons all week?" Amanda joked.

"It wasn't my flying lessons he missed, my dear daughter," Dotty said with a wink as she headed up the stairs to the bathroom.

"Mother," Amanda tried to pretend to be shocked.  _And I won the bet._ She laughed to herself. She realized she hasn't had a chance to call Lee since they got home. Picking up the phone, she dialed his home number but was surprised when the machine picked up. "Lee, it's me, Amanda. I was just checking in to see how you were. I guess you're out. I'll see you at work tomorrow. Bye bye."

Lee listened to the message, fighting the urge to pick up the phone. He wanted to talk to Amanda, he missed her, but he was in no condition to. After talking to her this morning, he went for a run to try to shake loose some of the cobwebs in his head. When that didn't work, he went to the Agency to be sure Dr. Smyth didn't have any more surprises up his sleeves. Instead he was given a rookie and a quick assignment for what should have been a milk run.

All they had to do was pick up a document at the White House and bring it back to the Agency. That was it. Instead, they found themselves in a fight with The Secret Service on the White House lawn when someone jumped the gates and tried to climb into Lee's car. The rookie made the stupid mistake of pulling his gun and shooting a warning shot in the air. He just spent the rest of the afternoon trying to sort that out without shooting the rookie himself.

Heading back to his apartment, his favorite jacket covered in grass stains with a new rip on the sleeve, Lee was tired, angry and hungry. He stopped by the pizza shop nearby and got a meat lovers pizza to go. His stomach may not like him later but right now it didn't matter. Grabbing another beer from the fridge, he sat on the couch, eating his pizza, listening to Amanda leave him a message.

"Well, at least I'll see her at the office tomorrow," he said. That idea put a smile on his face for the moment. But now, he was almost afraid to fall asleep. He needed to sleep without the nightmare waking him several times. He refused to take any kind of medication, even aspirin if he could avoid it so a sleeping pill was out of the question. Realizing a few swallows of some very nice expensive Scotch might be helpful, Lee poured himself a glass, went and changed his clothes. Sitting on the edge of his bed, his parents picture was still on the nightstand where he had left it.  _I'll have to have Amanda give me a picture of her._ That would be perfect beside his bed. Laying against the pillow, he tried to focus on her face as he fell into a restless sleep.

Monday morning came early in the King household. The boys were not happy about having to get up early to go to school. Amanda spent more time that morning reminding Phillip and Jamie about their schedule for the week, appointments that afternoon and practice times for basketball. Dotty was up early, but unlike her grandsons, didn't have to be anywhere in particular, so she simply hung around the kitchen.

Amanda was annoyed as she backed out of her driveway to drive the boys to school before heading to the Agency. By the time she got to the middle school to drop the boys off, Phillip realized he left his homework on the coffee table in the family room. Amanda was bordering between being angry at Phillip for being so irresponsible and herself for not checking the table before they left. She promised him she would go home and get it and bring it back so he wouldn't get into trouble.

Arriving at the Agency almost an hour late, Amanda's mood hadn't changed much. She wasn't sure why she mad anymore but she was definitely not her usual perky self. Lee wasn't in Q Bureau nor was he in the bullpen. Billy had called a morning briefing to go over any open cases of importance. Lee missed the meeting, much to Amanda's disappointment. Francine just looked at her, eyebrow raised. At the end of the meeting, Amanda hung back to talk to Mr. Melrose.

"Sir, have you seen Lee this morning?" Amanda asked, hoping it sounded casual, not worried.

"I spoke with him earlier. He said he would be late. He had something he needed to do, an appointment or something. Is everything ok?" Billy was surprised. Amanda looked worried, she wasn't very cheery today, totally out of character for her.

"I think so. I'm not really sure. He just didn't sound like himself yesterday," Amanda said thoughtfully.

"Well, I'm sure he's fine. I'll talk to him when he comes in," Billy tried to reassure her.

"Thank you, sir. I need to leave a little early today, if that's ok. Jamie has an appointment at the orthodontist. I tried to change it later in the day but …." Amanda was trying explain.

"No problem, Amanda. Take the day if you'd like. I'm sure you must have plenty to do at home since the boys got home from their vacation. How did they like Vermont?" Billy nodded. He was a family man after all and remembered what the first few days home after a long family vacation were like.

They spent the next few minutes just discussing some of the things the boys had told her about, making casual conversation. Billy could see something was bothering Amanda. He figured it had something to do with Lee but he didn't want to pry too much.  _I thought they were making progress?_

Checking back into Q Bureau in case Lee had come back, Amanda found it just as empty as it was earlier. Writing Lee a quick note, she taped it to his computer screen, asking him to call her later. She was really beginning to get worried and needed to talk to him but she didn't dare put that on the note in case someone else read it. Instead, she just wrote, "Billy gave me the day, call me at home". She didn't even sign it. Locking the door behind her, Amanda went home, worried about Lee.

A few hours later, Lee finally unlocked the door to Q Bureau. He was in a better mood after a full body massage and a restful nap with no nightmare.  _Maybe that's all I needed, to be relaxed._ Smiling, hoping Amanda was waiting for him inside, he walked inside but the office was dark. Slightly disappointed, Lee walked over to his desk to see Amanda's note. Picking up the phone, he dialed her number.

"Hello?" Dotty answered the phone.

_Damn,_ Lee didn't really want to talk to Dotty. "Hello, Mrs. West, this is Lee Stetson, is Amanda home?"

"Mr. Stetson, no I'm sorry she's going to pick up the boys at school. Is there a message for her?" Dotty was friendly enough although she wasn't sure how much she trusted this man.

"No, ah, no message. I'll see her at the office tomorrow. Thank you," Lee hung up the phone. He wanted to talk to her, but he knew she had things to do with her family today.  _Maybe someday it won't be like this._


	14. Unfinished Business Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***A/N: Most of the next two chapters will be a summary of the episode "Unfinished Business" with a few of my own thoughts filtered in. Dialogue is as close as I could get it. Any scenes excluded will not change this story. ***

Tuesday morning was much easier on both Lee and Amanda. Lee arrived at the Agency early, hoping to clear their schedules so they could spend the day together. Amanda's boys were much more cooperative, remembering their homework and lunch and with a gentle reminder from Amanda about their afternoon practice schedule she dropped the off at school to head to work.

Lee spent a few minutes attempting to look through files for anything outstanding when the phone rang. It was Beaman downstairs attempting to get Lee to go on another milk run.

"No. No, I'm gonna be busy here all day. Believe me. Uh…So I'm just gonna have to say…I'm just gonna have to say goodbye," Lee heard the door rattling, "Goodbye." He hung the phone up quickly and sat down, attempting to look casual.

Amanda walked in carrying flowers, "Good morning," she said with a smile.

"Good morning," Lee just smiled back.

"Pretty morning, huh," Amanda wanted to judge his mood.

"Yes it is," he simply smiled at her.

Putting the flowers in a vase on her desk, Amanda replied, "I grew these flowers in my own garden."

Lee, still smiling replied, "Well, they're very pretty."

"Lovely, I know," Amanda walked around her desk to put her purse down. Turning to face Lee as she sat down, she asked, "Ok, what's up?"

Lee picked his hands up and replied "Absolutely nothing."

Amanda didn't really believe him, "You're kidding?"

Getting up from his desk, he walked over to hers, "Nope, all my reports are in. No urgent cases pending and my calendar is clear. So what do you say we get out of here before Billy comes up with something for me to do?" I could think of a few things we could do.

"You mean ditch?"

Teasing, Lee said, "Ah, let's call it a lesson in casual surveillance."

Amanda knows what he's trying to do, "Noooo." She remembered the large envelope she had brought in with her.

Lee tried another suggestion, leaning on her desk, "A walk in the park, huh?"

Amanda got up and walked around her desk to hand Lee the envelope, "Mrs. Marston gave this to me to give to you."

Lee didn't want any work, "Yeah, yeah, well it can wait."

Amanda sighs, "It's CIA."

Lee began to open the larger envelope. Amanda looked over curiously. He pulls a smaller envelope off first and notices Amanda looking over his shoulder. He knew this was the files he had requested just a few days ago. He just didn't want Amanda to see it before he had a chance to go over it. She didn't know anything about his parents, other than they died when he was 5.

Amanda was trying to get a peek at the letter. It was unusual for Lee to hide files like this. "I'm not looking." She looked away for a brief moment.

Lee pulled the smaller letter out and began to read it softly, "Dear Mr. Stetson, in request…"

Amanda knew by the change in his face something was wrong. "What's the matter?"

Lee took a deep breath, smiled then started to put the letter away, "Nothing… Amanda, I just thought of something that I have to do. You go ahead and take the day off, huh?" He hated hiding this from her but he needed time to look everything over before he talked to her.

Amanda was surprised at his sudden change of attitude. "You're kidding?" I wish he would just talk to me about it.

Lee was trying to rush her out of the room. He knew the only way she would leave would be by force so he gently pushed her out saying, "No, no, I'm not kidding. Its just a routine thing but really it's not necessary for you to…"

Amanda was confused now, "I'm here to work, I'm not here to…"

Lee rushing her again, "It's ok."

"Maybe I can help you... " she was trying.

Lee realized she knew something was up. Trying to keep things light, he replied, "Come on, take the day off while you can."

"Really, you should…" Amanda was still trying… Lee pushed her gently out of the office and closed the door. Not knowing what she should do, she just stood there, looking at the door. Shaking her head, she headed home.

Inside the office, Lee was sitting at his desk, opening the envelope with two folders in it. In the folders are field reports on his parents, Matthew and Jennie Stetson. Lee sat quietly reading what he could from the redacted files. "British Intelligence? My mother?" He was confused. No one had ever told him she was British Intelligence. He noticed a name on the file… Thomas Blackthorne. He is considered a hero, sticking up for the underdog. Right now he was helping Rene Sinclair in his crusade to clean up his island nation. What Lee didn't know, is Thomas is the one that arranged for his parent's 'accident'.

Maybe I can use McCrary. He has access to the original files, and I'm pretty sure I know a few secrets he might not want to get out.. Madrid…. That apartment….

Later that afternoon, Lee met with McCrary, asking him to help get the name of the original source of the reports. McCrary agreed, hoping he wouldn't tell anyone about Madrid.

Amanda spent the rest of the evening confused but distracted by her family. She wanted to call him but figured he needed some time and space. It just bothers me he won't talk about it.

The next morning, Amanda went to the office early. She wanted to be there when Lee got there. She needed him to know she was there to help him if he needed it, to be there for him if he needed that too.

Opening the door to the Q Bureau, Amanda said loudly, "Good Morning!" but Lee wasn't there. Amanda walked in, put her things down and looked over at the mess on Lee's desk. She sat down and began straightening up the files and folders on his desk. She noticed the folders he had received from the CIA were sitting on top of the keyboard. She started to move them but realized the names on the tabs were Lee's parents, Jennie and Matthew Stetson. Opening the files, she glanced inside just as Lee opened the door to the office.

"Amanda," Lee is surprised to see her there early, and at his desk, going through the files.

"Hello…." Amanda replied too loudly, too quickly.

"Wha- What are you doing here?" he asked almost angry, but he couldn't really be angry with her.

"Well, uh," Amanda started to reply.

Lee cut her off, "I thought I told you to take the day off."

Amanda is surprised by his reaction, "Well, you did. That was yesterday, not today."

"Yeah, well, what are you doing?" He asked.

"Well, I was just straightening up your desk," she replied trying to be natural.

Lee, tried to take the files out of her hand, "Well, you know that, uh, I can never find anything… anywhere… when someone straightens up my desk, right?"

Amanda's feelings were hurt now. Why is he acting like this? "Well, I"m sorry. I just thought I'd uh…" Lee began walking away, taking the files with him, "Where are you going?"

Lee opened the door and as he was leaving simply said, "I've got some things to do."

Oh, Lee. I wish you'd let me in on this. I wish you wouldn't push me away. She couldn't help about the last few days they had been together. Was he now hiding his feelings from her because of something in those files? Was he afraid she was pregnant and couldn't handle it because of something he read? Amanda decided to go home and get changed before she decided what to do next.

Lee took the files home and spent most of the morning going over every detail. Every photograph and report note that they contained. He still felt lousy over how he had treated Amanda the day before, he had slept poorly, the nightmares invading his mind every time he closed his eyes. And then that morning, he pushed her away. Not as physically as he had done the day before but he knew by the look in her eyes that she was hurt. Somehow I will make this up to her.

He laid on the couch, thinking about his parents, what little he could remember of them. Taking the picture from the end table, Lee hugged it as he closed his eyes, exhaustion taking over. The nightmare began again, him as a young boy, searching his parents home while the monster chases him. He woke up in a cold sweat, his answering machine clicking on, hearing Amanda's voice leaving him a message. "Hello, it's me again… Amanda...I wish you'd answer… I'm really sorry I upset you, and I'd like to at least talk about it. So I hope you'll call me as soon as you get a chance. Ok, bye". It was hurting him to know she was blaming herself.

Moving to the bedroom, Lee stretched out to try to rest again. His head hurt from lack of sleep, his heart hurt because of what he was doing to Amanda. But he wasn't ready, not yet, to tell her everything. He needed to have his own answers before he could give her any.

Back in Arlington, Amanda decided she was going to make Lee talk to her, even if he didn't like it. Driving to his apartment, Amanda went over everything in her head. Every bad scenario she could think of was going through her mind. He didn't want to be with her anymore. If she was pregnant he was going to panic and run. Or worse, was he going to ask her to…. She couldn't even bring herself to think of that possibility.

Arriving at his building, his car was parked out front. The doorman didn't even question her as he immediately let her in. She knocked on Lee's door for a few minutes but he didn't answer so she tried her lock picking skills. She had watched Lee enough times she was pretty sure she would be able to do it. After a few minutes she felt the lock give so she quietly opened the door and stepped inside.

She didn't hear Lee moving around but his car was there so he must be right? "Hello?" she called stepping into his living room. She didn't get an answer but noticed all the pictures on the coffee table. Picking up one of them, she heard a sound from the bedroom and took the picture with her without thinking. She saw Lee sleeping on the bed… the same bed they had made love in the first time just a few nights ago. It seemed like a lifetime ago with the way he had been behaving.

She decided to try to wake him without startling him so she whispered his name, "Lee." That didn't work so she got closer, leaned over him and whispered again "Lee are you all right?". In a split second she found herself flying through the air, landing on her back, Lee pinning her down on the bed by her arms.

Half awake, Lee looked down at her, "Amanda?"

"Yes," she was scared by his response.

Lee lets go of her, sounding angry, "What the hell are you doing here?" Without giving her a chance to answer, he rolled off, sitting on the edge of the bed. "Well, how did you get in here anyway?"

Amanda really wanted to yell at him, scream at him but instead, she sat behind him on the edge of the bed, "Lockpick, standard issue."

Lee ran his fingers through his hair, "I'm gonna have to do something about that." he said.

Amanda sat beside him, not knowing exactly what he needed from her right that moment. So she began, "Look, I know this is about your mom and dad."

Lee was still struggling with his feelings. "And what makes you think that?" he practically snapped at her.

Amanda continued,"Well, their pictures are all over the living room… and besides that I saw the CIA folders on your desk… I mean, you know….I didn't mean to snoop, but I snooped. I'm sorry I snooped. I did."

As soon as Amanda started to confess to snooping Lee said at the same time, "So you snooped. Yeah, mm-hmmm." shaking his head in confirmation.

Lee took a deep breath. "Amanda."

"Yeah."

"This is something that's very personal… can't you just leave it at that?"

Amanda looked right at him, wanting to kiss him. Instead she replied, "No, because when somebody that I care about hurts, I hurt too."

Lee just looked at her, not real sure what to do next. "I've never told anyone… I've never leaned on anybody, even when I needed to."

Amanda wanted to shake him, but knowing that wasn't what he needed simply replied, "You can lean on me, I'm a lot stronger than I look."

Smiling at each other, Lee stood, held out his hand and said, "Let's take a walk." He lead her out of his apartment to the park across the street. Arm in arm them stroll through the park talking.

"That file I just got?" Lee began.

"Yeah?" Amanda replied.

"It's a follow-up to reports from an undisclosed source saying that my mother and father were double agents during the war." Lee continued.

"Oh, come on now, you know that isn't true." Amanda wanted to reassure him.

"How do I know that?" Lee snapped again.

Amanda quietly responded, "Well, I mean, you don't… you don't know...I … I guess you'll just have to … to prove it. I mean, are you willing to do that?"

Lee was clenching his teeth, a sign he was agitated again, "Yes. Amanda, there's this nightmare that I've.. I've had ever since I was a little boy…." Lee describes the nightmare in detail to Amanda, her eyes getting wider as he speaks. He finished his description by telling her "I know that this door, means something… it's important, Amanda. Now I have an idea. Do you really wanna help me?"

Amanda looked at him, her hands on his chest, "Ohhh, That's a pretty silly question."

Lee looked at her again, hoping she would understand how important this was to him, "Then you're REALLY gonna have to trust me."

While Lee and Amanda were working on Lee's plan to discover why that door was so important, Thomas Blackthorne was up to his old tricks. He was planning the murder of Rene Sinclair and was getting all the pieces in place.


	15. Unfinished Business Part 2

Lee and Amanda drove to the Agency where Lee had convinced her to help him steal a vial from the dispensary. Amanda spent the next few minutes distracting Dr. Anderson by asking him the question of how aspirin works. Once they are out of the bullpen Lee told her the drug is promazepam, a highly experimental drug with unpredictable side effects. Amanda was not happy and as they disagreed waiting for the elevator Billy interrupted them and questions why they were at the dispensary. Amanda outright lied to him and said she had a horrible headache.

Billy then informs them they got wind of the plot to kill Sinclair. He needs them to keep their eyes and ears open. He also told Lee, McCrary has been trying to reach him. He needed to see Lee ASAP.

Back in the Q Bureau, Lee called McCrary and scheduled a meeting for an hour. He and Amanda drove over to meet him. McCrary handed Lee and envelope with a unredacted copy of the report of Lee's father. The name of the source was clearly visible - Thomas Blackthorne. Lee was having a hard time wrapping his brain around this one. Lee asked Amanda, "Why would he want to accuse my parents of treason?" Lee wanted answers so he decided the best way to get them was from the source himself.

Together they drove to Blackthorne's estate. Using their Agency badges, they bypassed the guards using the story of the death threats against Sinclair. Once inside, Lee handed the files on his parents to Blackthorne to ask him why he filed them. Blackthorne used the excuse he "heard things and had to report them." Lee was angry. Something wasn't right. They leave and head back to the Agency where Billy was waiting for them. He yelled at the two of them about abusing their badges and positions to get information about a personal matter. He also warned them to stay away from Blackthorne. Wanting to steer clear of Billy for the rest of the day, they headed back to Lee's apartment.

Lee's plan was to use the promazapam to try to remember more about his parents and what the real meaning of his dream was. He had made a list of questions he wanted Amanda to ask him while he was under. Amanda was not happy about this because she was still nervous.

Lee reminded her," All right, now, remember, if my temperature spikes suddenly or if I start to get violent, you bring me right out of this."

Amanda still wasn't happy, "Yeah…"

Lee continued, "If I start to convulse…"

Amanda interrupted him, "Please don't do that…"

Laying back on the pillow Lee closed his eyes, "See you later…."

Amanda watched his expression soften. "Lee? Can you hear me?"

Lee nodded, mumbling, "mmm-mmmm."

Amanda questioned him again, "Do you know who I am?"

Lee smiled, "My Amanda."

Amanda smiled, knowing he was still with her on some level. Looking at the list Lee had given her, she started asking him questions about his dream. "Where are you?"

Lee responded, "I'm down in the basement." He shook his head, remembering being a small child, "I'm not supposed to be down here."

Amanda pushed a little more, "Do you see the locked door?"

Lee began having flashbacks to when he was 5, "Yes." In his mind, his 5 year old self was calling, "Dad? Open the door!"

Amanda sensed something was happening, "What's behind the door?"

Lee was still reacting as if he was still 5, his voice changed. Softly he said, "Mommy and Daddy….It's safe…"

Amanda realized what he was saying and whispers as she notes on her notepad, "There's a room in the basement."

Lee kept talking, "I .. I can't tell…. It's supposed to be a secret…."

Amanda can tell he is torn between his present self and his 5 year old self. She tried responding to him as if he was one of her boys, "Shh, shhh, its okay. You don't have to. Okay? You're back upstairs now…" Following the next set of questions, she continued. "Uhh, you're in the hallway now and the monster is there."

Lee started breathing heavy, panicking. In Lee's memory, he is pulling on the door knob, "Open the door!"

Amanda tried another tactic, "He can't hurt you because, uh, he can't move. Because he's frozen. Can't move and he can't hurt you. Alright, now what does he look like?"

Lee frowned, "It doesn't have a face."

Amanda knew he wasn't going to get any more information. "It's gone. The monster's gone…When I count to three, you'll wake up and you'll feel refreshed, and good as if you'd had a long night's sleep. You feeling all right?"

Lee nodded, "Mmm I'm, I'm fine."

Amanda was thinking maybe this was a way she could get answer to how many sexual partners he had before her or how he really felt if he found out she was pregnant. He would answer honestly. She knew he would.

Amanda started to ask, "Do you have time for one more questi…" She chickened out. She wanted to know but at the same time, she wanted him to tell her when he was ready. "Nevermind, look… Okay, one… two… three…"

Lee opened his eyes, panicking. "The room in the basement." He tried to get off the bed but Amanda did her best to push him back down.

"Hey, wait a minute you can't get up. You've got almost a whole cc of that stuff in you." She was trying to be firm but he was fighting her still. "Now the manual says you gotta stay down for 12 hours. Now come on."

Lee wasn't planning on following any manual guides. "You just help me or I'm gonna do this on my own."

Lee knew the only place he would get any real answers was at his childhood home. He and Amanda drove over there and parked in front of the house by the tree he used to play in as a kid. As he got out of the car, a boy was playing in the tree. The promazapam was still running through his system and the side effects were starting to happen. Lee assured Amanda several times that he was ok. They knocked on the door and confirming no one was home, picked the lock to let themselves in.

Walking through the home, Lee heard the voices of his parents in his mind. It took him a few minutes to reorient himself with the layout of the house before remembering exactly where the door to the basement was. As they walked down into the basement, Lee doubted himself. He was looking around for the door in his dreams all while his parents voices were filling his head. The effects of the promazapam were getting worse. Until finally Lee realized he wasn't looking for a locked door, he was looking for a trap door. He cut the vinyl flooring near a wall and found it.

Inside the hidden room, Lee and Amanda found files on the desk covered in dust. Before they left, Lee noticed his father's pipe sitting on the desk. He picked it up and put it in his pocket, but not after seeing Amanda was watching him. She smiled at him in silent understanding. They had just talked about that pipe a few days ago. It felt like a lifetime now. Taking the files with them, they left the house and headed back to Lee's apartment to go over what they contained.

Amanda and Lee find lists of corporation names, with notes taken in an old style of shorthand that Amanda remembered Francine used. Although the list was 30 years old, neither of them had heard of any of the companies and tried comparing them on the stock exchange list. Not one of the companies was listed. They both decided it was highly unlikely all of the companies had gone out of business.

Included with the the files was a book that Amanda opened, realizing it was Lee's mother's diary. She also found a letter addressed to Lee. Lee started to read it but couldn't finish so he asked Amanda to read it to him. It began with the story of how Jennie and Matthew actually met, in a way very similar to how Lee and Amanda met. They were in London and Matthew was being chased for an envelope he had. He asked Jennie to bring it to the Prime Minister's office. The story was almost a mirror image of their own first meeting.

Deciding they couldn't do anymore that night, Amanda went home and Lee slept soundly for the first time in a week, no nightmares invading his dreams and the effects of the promazapam held at bay for the time being. The next morning, Lee and Amanda went over the list of the companies again to find they were all either bought out or bankrupt. They also discovered the companies could all be traced back to one company owned by Thomas Blackthorne. They tried to explain all of this to Billy but he only got angry with them. Instead of telling them to continue their research, he told them to give their information to Francine and take a couple of days off.

Francine discovered in one of the notes that Blackthorne was advised to turn himself in after someone figured out it was all fraud. The last dated entry was the same day Lee's parents were killed.

Putting all the notes together Francine said, "Thomas Blackthorne sold Allied supplies to the Russians? That's treason.

Amanda also added, "And then he took the money to an obscure little country, started a business empire and kept right on stealing."

Francine then realized it, "That explains why he's so friendly with Rene Sinclair."

Although Billy had just told them to take a few days off Lee knew what needed to be done, "Is he still in the country?"

"The International Communications Agency is throwing a luncheon at the Plaza in his honour at one o'clock and then he's going straight from there to the airport," Francine answered.

"Well, if we want to talk to him, we'd better get rolling," Lee walked out of the bullpen, leading Amanda with his hand on her back.

At the Plaza Hotel, Lee immediately notices Blackthorne's associate watching something on a high roof across from the entrance to the Plaza. He followed the line of sight to see a shooter on the roof. He sent Amanda inside to stay with Sinclair. He and Francine told the Secret Service stationed outside about the shooter. Francine arrested Blackthorne's associate as Lee and two of the Secret Service officers arrested the shooter.

During the arrest, Lee had another flashback. He was in the tree, watching a man leave his parent's house. That man was Thomas Blackthorne. All the pieces of the puzzle now fit together. Lee rushed down to the street to find Amanda.

Lee was calling,"Amanda."

Amanda replied, "Yeah?" She could hear the anxiety in his voice.

"He did it," Lee rushed toward his car.

Amanda was confused," Who? Did what?"

Lee practically shouted at her, "Blackthorne's behind everything…He put the shooter on the roof and he killed my parents!"

Amanda was running behind him, trying to keep up. "Wait a minute."

Getting in his car, he kept talking, "I heard him!"

"Wait a minute. Lee! Where are you going?" Amanda couldn't catch him before he closed the door.

Through the open car window he yelled, "I was in the tree and I heard it."

Amanda was really confused, "Lee. What tree?"

Lee yelled as he pulled away from the curb, "It was no accident!"

"Wha…Wait up! Lee!" Amanda understood what he was talking about. She ran toward Francine's car and without a second thought, took it to follow Lee, leaving Francine in the street yelling to her.

Amanda followed Lee to Blackthorne's estate. She had an idea of what he was going to do. Following him inside, she could hear him yelling at Blackthorne. Following the sounds of the their voices, she saw Lee holding a gun on Blackthorne.

Blackthorne was sitting at his desk, "Stetson. The Secret Service told you not to interfere with me."

Lee replied, "They did."

Blackthorne was angry, "If you got a point to make, make it!"

Lee began, "I know what happened. My mother and father found out about your… dealings with the Russians…Then you fed the CIA with a lot of phony accusations to discredit them… But it was too big a risk to let them live, so you staged an accident. I want to hear you admit it."

"Holding a gun on me is not the way to get to the truth," Blackthorne was trying to reason with him.

"You killed my mother and father, you bastard!" Lee yelled at him.

Watching his face, Blackthorne was getting more nervous by the minute, "Stetson..."

Lee stopped him, "Your shooter missed his target today, Blackthorne, and the Secret Service isn't far behind me, so I think you want to get out of here, fast."

Blackthorne swallowed hard, " All right. If I admit it, will you let me walk?"

Lee slowly lowered the gun and said quietly, "Yeah, sure… You can walk."  _Over my dead body._

Blackthorne tried, "Everything I said before was the truth. See I made a lot of mistakes, but I didn't wanna spend the rest of my life paying for them…But your parents…your parents were very good at their job. And they had a lot of stuff on me, enough to nail me. I had to discredit them. So we set up this meeting. But the truck, that truck came out of nowhere. The accident was real..."

Lee yelled, "No it wasn't!" He didn't believe him. He leveled off the gun, point it directly at Blackthorne.

Blackthorne panicked, "Wait!…I told you. I framed them. Now we had an agreement."

Lee looked him straight in the eye, "I lied."

Blackthorne thought he was a dead man, right then and there. Instead, Lee squinted and turned away.. started having another flashback. His parents, home, hugging. A time when everything was simple, safe. After a few seconds, Lee shook his head, trying to clear the cobwebs, the side effects of the promazapam. Blackthorne was watching him, and knew something was off and tried to use Lee's moment of confusion to his advantage.

Amanda was watching from the doorway the entire time. She wasn't sure exactly what Blackthorne was going to do but she knew Lee needed help. She watched Blackthorne open a desk drawer and take out a gun. As he lifted the gun to aim at Lee, she reacted. Grabbing the first thing in her reach she spun a plate at the wall, smashing it, snapping Lee out of his fog. He immediately focused on Blackthorne and pulls the trigger, killing him.

Amanda ran to Lee, wrapping her arms around him protectively. The effects of the promazapam were finally wearing off. He is exhausted and emotionally drained now.

Lee could barely talked, "Amanda?"

Amanda was holding him, "Yeah?"

Lee nodded toward Blackthorne, "The monster…has a face."

Amanda held him, knowing words were not going to help him now. The next few hours were spent sorting out the shooting with the Agency, the Secret Service and the local police. Amanda had made the call to Billy who spent the first few minutes yelling. She was afraid he was going to have a heart attack with the stress. And Amanda being Amanda was able to talk him down calmly explaining how Lee put all the pieces together.

Back at the Agency, Lee was subjected to debriefing for several hours. During that time, Amanda was in Q bureau working on her own report of the events that had occurred for the last few days. Late that night, they were both sent home. Lee was physically and emotionally drained. They decided it would be best to go to their own homes. Lee finally had a restful night's sleep, no nightmares.

The next day, instead of going directly to the Agency, Lee went to the cemetery to visit his parent's graves. It was there that Amanda found him, hours later. She brought more flowers she had grown in her garden. Lee told her he wished she could have known them, and she told him she did, through him. They shared a tender hug, although Amanda really needed more. She felt Lee had pulled away from her the last few days.

It had been a week since the first night they had together, 6 days since the night she had made dinner for him. Not only had they barely had any time together, it had been 6 days since she last heard him say "I love you." She knew the last few days had been hard on him emotionally and she also knew Lee Stetson didn't deal well with emotions. Holding him in the cemetery, Amanda suggested they go somewhere to talk.


	16. The conversation

 

Amanda followed Lee back to his apartment. She knew if they were going to talk, it needed to be in private where they most likely would not get interrupted. Once inside, she sat in the couch and waited for him as he made coffee for the two of them. She was going to let him start the conversation they both knew they needed to have.

While he waited for the coffee to finish, Lee checked his voice messages on the machine, not ignoring Amanda but also not ready to talk yet. A lot had happened in the last few days. Lee knew he hadn't been completely fair to her, practically pushing her away. But he also knew she understood his need to find the truth about his parents. She was there with him, every step, even reading the letter his mother wrote to him so long ago. Amanda was very special to him and he knew he had to find the words to tell her.

Walking back into the kitchen, Lee poured two cups of coffee and brought them back to the living room. He moved to the couch beside Amanda, handing her the mug as he sat down.

"Amanda, I.. " he started.  
"Lee, I…" she also began. Looking up at him, she said, "You first."

"Amanda… I'm… I'm not very good at these things so I guess… I guess I owe you an apology," Lee stammered out.

"You guess?" Amanda was puzzled.

"No, no, what I mean is… I do… I do owe you an apology. I've pushed you away the last few days and well, I'm sorry… I hope… I hope I didn't hurt you," Lee was having a hard time making eye contact with her. He loved her and he didn't want to do anything to jeopardize their relationship. It was still so new, so fragile and Lee didn't have the best track record with relationships. Most of them never lasted more than a few weeks.

"Lee, you don't need to apologize. You were having a tough time and I understand that. I want you to know I'm here. If you need someone to talk to or just need someone to be here with you. You don't need to apologize for …" Amanda's heart went out to him. She didn't want him to think he had done something wrong for needed help, for needing someone to lean on.

"Amanda," Lee finally raised his eyes to look at her, "I've never had someone in my life that I.. felt like I could tell them anything and they wouldn't walk away. You… you give me a peace… a calm… aw heck I don't even have words for it… but YOU give that to me. When the nightmares started happening it was you, your presence that kept them away and when you weren't here, or I couldn't feel you here, they were back."

Lee put his coffee mug down on the table, Amanda following suit. He reached for her hands, pulling them to his lips. "You do something to me, no one else has ever done."

Amanda laughed, "I'm pretty sure you've had plenty of …"

Lee put a finger to her lips to stop her, "Amanda, I don't mean like that. Physically, yes, I've had a lot," he was shaking his head, smiling, "a lot of things done to me, but you… you do something to me here." He placed her hand on his chest. "Something Dorothy, Ava and even Andy couldn't… didn't do. I thought I was in love before, but it was nothing compared to what I feel for you."

Amanda just looked at him. She didn't know what to say. What she thought was him avoiding her because she might be pregnant was so far off the mark. She knew now, how much he really did love her. He trusted her with his secrets and for Scarecrow that was saying a lot.

"Amanda, I realized today as I was at the cemetery, that I haven't been fair to you either. This entire week I was so wrapped up in my parents death and the mystery behind their case files that I haven't thought of how you've been feeling. You've just been there for me all week and I haven't even thanked you for your help once," Lee knew the words had to come out.

"Lee, I'm fine. I'll be fine. I knew… I knew you needed me to be there for you and well, that's what I did. I mean, that's what you do for the people you love right? I told you the other day when someone I care about hurts, I hurt too. And well, you were hurting. Its the kind of pain that goes away over time, but you can't take a pill to make it better. The only way I know how to help take that kind of pain away, is by giving love," Amanda ran her hand down his cheek as she spoke.

"Amanda King, I love you. I know I haven't said it much this week… hell, I don't think I've said it at all but I do. I hope you know that," Lee captured her hand in his, bringing it to his lips again.

"And I love you too. I just want you to know if you need me… for anything… that I'm going to be there for you." Amanda smiled. It felt good to hear those words again. She was afraid he might not say them again.

"And I don't want you to think I have forgotten about last week… it's only been a week right?" Lee asked.

"Yes, only 7 days.. Since… well, you know," Amanda shrugged her shoulders.

"And anything… any symptoms yet?" Lee wasn't sure how to ask.

"No, no it's too soon for that. I still have at least another week before I'm due… for… and then if it doesn't happen, then another week before anything would show up on a test," Amanda replied. Why did it seem so hard to talk about it?

Picking up his coffee, Lee took a big sip. Holding the mug, he was contemplating what to do next. They really should go to the office. Billy was expecting them hours ago, wanting his report he was sure. But Lee wasn't ready to leave just yet. He felt something was still unresolved between them.

Putting the mug back down, Lee turned to her again. He reached for her cheek, tracing the line of her jaw with his fingers. Pulling her closer to him, he leaned forward and kissed her gently. It was a soft kiss, not demanding, not suggesting of anything other than he need to touch her. To thank her for just being her.

Amanda felt his lips touch hers and immediately her hand went to his head to run her fingers through his hair. Kissing him back, she was the one who deepened it. She sensed something was holding them both back and she wanted to break through that barrier once and for all.

They separated long enough to take a breath, their foreheads touching, her hand on his head, his fingers on her chin. Leaning, Amanda immediately kissed him again, this time sliding her hand down his neck to begin loosening his tie. She wanted him, needed him. Lee moved his hand to hers, "Amanda, we don't… we don't have to…. Do this… if you don't want to," he said breathlessly.

"But what if I want to," she replied, her voice husky with desire. How was it possible that he could make her feel this way with only a kiss?

Lee silently thanked the Gods for the dress she had chosen to wear that day. His nimble fingers undid the buttons on the top as she made quick work of his tie and the first few buttons on his shirt. He began a slow line of kisses down her neck toward the open V and the newly exposed skin. Just as he was about to slide his hand on her breast, there was a knock on his door.

The two of them jumped back away from each other, looking at the door. Lee stood, scrambling to his feet, almost tripping in the process. Trying to button his shirt as he practically ran to the door, he looked over at Amanda. She was struggling to button the top of her dress. He looked out the peephole on his door to see Billy standing there.

Doing his best to smooth his shirt, he realized his tie was just hanging so he pulled it off and shoved it in his pocket. When Amanda finally looked presentable, Lee opened the door. "Billy, what ah… what are you doing here?"

"Checking on you! You and Amanda didn't show up for work today or did you forget you even had a job? I've been on the phone all morning trying to hunt you down!" Billy didn't see Amanda sitting on the couch until he took a few steps into the room. "Amanda? I'm sorry, I didn't know you were… sitting here having coffee…. Did I interrupt anything?" His tone dropped significantly.

"No, Mr. Melrose, I found Lee at the cemetery a little while ago and well I thought he might have needed someone to talk to. You know, a friend. I'm sorry I didn't call to tell you. I didn't mean to make you worry," Amanda was doing her best to calm him down but not give any indication of what was going on just a few minutes before.

Billy looked at her and then back at Lee. Nothing looked amiss, just two friends having coffee. And he knew that Lee probably did need someone to talk to. He would never willing go to Dr. McJohn or any of the other shrinks at the office. Amanda was better for him anyway. "Well, I'm sorry I got in the way. Take the rest of the day, if you need it. I'll see you both in my office on Monday. And Scarecrow, make sure that report is finalized… in your handwriting please. I don't need Dr. Smyth coming to visit me again any time soon. I'd like to be able to spend time with my family next week, not holed up with him. Amanda, have a wonderful weekend. Lee, get some rest."

Billy walked out of the door Lee was still holding open. He was confused what just happened. Closing the door he looked at Amanda and said "Did you talk Billy into giving us the rest of the day off?"

She looked at him and laughed. "I think so although I don't really know how."

Now it was Lee's turn to laugh.


	17. Anger and Grief

"Do you know what this means?" Lee asked, smiling as he walked back toward Amanda.

She was sitting on the couch, nervously smoothing out her skirt still. "Noooo, are you going to tell me?" she asked, smiling back at him.

"What time does your mother think you are coming home?" Lee tilted his head as he asked.

"Well, she thinks we are working, and well, you know, it is Friday and Friday is our editing day so we could be busy for hours… in the editing room," Amanda replied slowly, teasing him.

Sitting back down on the couch beside her, he slid his hand around her chin to the back of her head to gently pull her forward. "Now, where were we?" He asked as he pulled her to him in a kiss.

"Right about here, " she replied as she captured his mouth with hers. Bringing her hands up his arms, she rubbed his shoulders before sliding both of them behind his head, pulling him closer. Lee wrapped his arms around her waist closing the gap between them completely. He couldn't get close enough.

What started out as a slow, sensual kiss quickly became intense. Lee's hands found the buckle to Amanda's belt and he immediately started removing it. Leaning her head back exposed her long neck which Lee promptly took advantage of. He left her mouth to trail hot, wet kisses down the exposed skin, setting her on fire.

Franticly they began unbuttoning, pulling, tugging, trying to get all material out of the way. Amanda practically ripped Lee's button off his pants trying to get it undone. Hands were constantly moving, searching for newly exposed skin. They didn't talk, they didn't need words. They needed to feel skin on skin contact, the heat from hands rubbing bare skin. They needed their bodies to speak what their hearts and minds were feeling.

Lee could barely control himself. He ached to feel her, to bury himself in her. He pulled her panties down her long legs and without hesitation, he leaned forward on the couch, pushing her onto her back. Reaching down between them, he slipped a finger inside her hot wet core, and knowing she was already ready for him, didn't even think as he slid himself inside and began to move. His pace was fast, furious, acting on pure animal instinct. Amanda could do nothing but hold onto him, calling his name. Within a few minutes, he could feel his stomach tightening and that's when it dawned on him. He reacted just in time, spilling his seed on Amanda's stomach, instead of inside of her.

He looked down at her and immediately pulled back, apologizing tearfully. "Amanda, I'm … I'm so sorry… I didn't… did I hurt you? I'm so sorry…." Tears began to slide down his cheeks. He got up quickly, rushing into the bathroom to get a wet cloth for her. He was so ashamed of himself. He had never lost control like that before. Handing her the cloth, he sat down on the couch with his head in his hands, tears still silently falling. He couldn't look at her, not now.

Amanda used the cloth to wipe herself off. Sitting up, she put her arms around Lee and just let him cry. He needed to. After everything that had happened that week, he needed to finally let the emotions go. She wasn't angry with him. He hadn't hurt her. It was a release even he didn't know he needed. She just sat with him, holding him until the tears stopped.

"Amanda… " Lee's voice was barely a whisper. "I'm sorry."

"Shhh, no…. You don't need to…" she comforted him. She rubbed his back with one hand, using the other to raise his face to look at her. "Hey, it's ok…"

"No… dammit… no… that… that was not ok. Amanda…. I… I don't know what happened. I lost control…. I could have hurt you…. I almost…. We didn't use…." Lee could barely get the words out, thinking what he almost did.

"Look at me! Lee! I'm fine, you didn't hurt me. I'm right here… It's okay." Amanda kept trying. She knew what he was struggling with. Scarecrow was always in control and Lee Stetson just lost his.

"Amanda! That was… you didn't consent to that!" Lee stood up, throwing his hands in the air.

Amanda almost never raised her voice, not even with her boys, but she knew she had to do something to break Lee's attention. He wasn't listening to her but he would. She was going to force him to, whether he liked it or not.

"Lee! Sit down!" Amanda stood up stepping in front of him. She seemed so much bigger than her thin frame. "Now you're going to listen to me and you're going to listen good, buster."

Lee immediately sat down and looked up at her. He had never seen this side of Amanda before.

"What just happened, happened. You didn't hurt me, I consented to that entirely. Hell, I practically tore your clothes off myself. You needed that. Because without that, you wouldn't know how much I truly love you. You need to grieve so you can start healing. And I'm going to be here the whole way. So if you even think about saying you're sorry one more time… I'm gonna…" Amanda stood right in front of him, her voice stern.

"You're gonna what?" Lee challenged. He couldn't believe the power she had over him.

"I'm gonna call Dr. Smyth and tell him that report will be done first thing tomorrow morning," she leaned forward, smiling. She had his attention, now she wanted to see him smile.

"Amanda, what am I going to do with you?" Lee just shook his head. "How do you do that?"

Amanda looked at him, "Do what?" she asked innocently.

"You know damn right well what you do," Lee said, no longer angry with himself. He loved her so much it made his heart ache at that moment. Taking her hands in his, he stood up and pulled her close. "I love you, Amanda King and I don't know how you do it but you have me twisted inside out like a paper bag."

"Lee, I love you too. But… um… do you think we can either go in the other room or put some clothes on… just in case Billy decides to come back…." Amanda was becoming aware they were standing in Lee's living room, completely naked, clothes thrown everywhere they looked.

Looking around, Lee began to laugh. His Amanda, once again, concerned about modesty. Pulling her close, he gave her a kiss. "Amanda, I'm sorry… I know, I know… that will never happen again… and I have a lot of making up to do for that."

Amanda gently kissed him back, "Starting now?"

"Starting now."


	18. Teasing and Grieving

The next few minutes were spent picking up clothes and bringing them into Lee's bedroom.

"You know, Amanda, I was thinking… Maybe you should have a change of clothes here. Or a robe or something," Lee suggested.

"You mean like one of those pink silk things all your lady friends' whose names end in 'I' wear? No, thank you. I'll take my cotton or terry cloth robe any day," she laughed.

"No, I don't mean like that. I just mean for when you're here, you will have something you are comfortable in. Me, I don't mind walking around …" Lee stuttered.

"Naked? Yeah, I've noticed that," Amanda replied, eyebrow raised. Sitting on the edge of the bed, she looked up at him. "And I don't mind watching either."

"A-man-da…. You… like watching me walk around… like this?" Lee stood there hands sweeping out to emphasis his point.

"Well, it's not just your mind that attracted me in the first place," she teased.

Taking two steps toward Amanda still sitting on the edge of the bed Lee decided to tease back, "Oh really? And what was that?"

"Well, it was..um… your perfect hair, combed only with the comb missing two teeth, that dimpled smile you seem to save only for me now… And my favorite part, those eyes…" Amanda quipped.

Taking two more steps, Lee was now standing directly in front of her. She had to look up to look him in the eye as she was eye level with his impressive manhood which was beginning to stir again.

"Uh huh… nothing else …. Impressed you… appealed to you?" Lee could see her beginning to blush. He knew he was getting to her, in all the good ways.

Reaching out, Amanda took him in her hands and slowly circled his width, squeezing him gently. He came alive in her hands, growing to full length almost immediately. "Well, maybe just a little something else…" she said without making eye contact but definitely smiling.

"Little? Little? How can you even say that?" Lee growled. He wanted to step back but he knew he couldn't. Instead he reached down and lifted Amanda far enough off the edge to push her back closer to the pillows. Seeing his reaction, she let go of him and scooted back, laughing.

"I'll give you little!" Lee laughed, practically diving on the bed beside her, pulling her close. Remembering the night she made dinner he found out she was ticklish, he began with her ribs. She was squirming but couldn't get away under the weight he was gently pressing on her.

"Lee, stop…. Please…. Stop…. It's… not…. Little… definitely… not," she gasped between giggles.

"Ok, ok…. I'll stop… only if you kiss me." Lee leaned forward expecting a simple kiss. What he didn't expect was Amanda to take advantage of this distraction. Before he could figure out what happened he was flipping over onto his back and she was straddling him, kissing his neck. "Woah… when… how…"

"Ah, Dr. Pain taught me a few new moves. I haven't been able to try that one out yet," she smiled into his neck. She continued kissing a line back to this mouth and began an all out assault on his lips and tongue.

"Amanda. We have all day. No need to rush." Lee wanted to go slow to make up for what had happened earlier.

Reaching into the top drawer, Amanda pulled out a condom from the box. Without answering him, she tore it open and reached down to cover him in seconds. She adjusted herself enough to slip him inside her in one swift movement. She gasped as soon as she did it.  _My gosh he feels amazing._

Lee couldn't believe what was happening. His Amanda was taking full control and all he could do was enjoy the ride. Reaching up, he slid his hands up her arms to her shoulders then down to cup her breasts in his hands. Taking this as a cue, she began to move, rolling her hips, rubbing her hands on his smooth chest. "Amanda…" Lee barely whispered.

He could hear her breaths short and fast, her movements beginning to hitch just a little bit. Pulling her down to his chest, he rolled her onto her back and began moving again. Drawing his length out fully and driving himself back in slow, Amanda wrapped her legs around his hips, encouraging him.

"Lee… please…" She buried her head in his shoulder, gasping with each stroke. Lee moved a little faster, her gasps becoming louder, his name on her lips. He knew the moment her orgasm began, she dug her nails into his shoulders, arched her back and his name dragged out. He could feel her body tighten around him, pulling him deeper into his own abyss.

"Amanda… that was…. Wow…" Lee shook his head. Moving his weight off her, he discarded the used condom and the wrapper in the trash, taking a quick peek again, just to be sure.

Rolling back toward her, he pulled her close, her head on his chest. Rubbing her back as he held her close, Lee put his chin on the top of her head. "Amanda, you have no idea what you do to me. For me…"

"I'm pretty sure I can guess…" Amanda smiled, rubbing light circles on his stomach with her nails.

"No, no, I don't mean like that, but that was pretty good too," Lee laughed. "You know, earlier, I was angry, not just at myself for what I did… what happened… Amanda, I promise you now, that will never happen again…. But after, when you... "

"When I what?" Amanda turned to look up at him.

"When you raised your voice at me… You've never done that before. I mean I've heard you yell, but to be firm and stern, you've never done that. You pulled me out of a deep place I was heading," Lee admitted. "And for that, I say thank you. And I love you."

"Lee, I'm here for you, I told you that. I'm thinking you never really grieved for your parents. And now you know the truth about them, maybe it's time you let go," Amanda suggested.

"Amanda, I can't just...let go… My uncle, the Colonel, made sure that I had an allotted amount of time to grieve and then after that it was no more tears allowed. 'Boys don't try over things like that, they move on.' That was the Colonel's model." Lee explained, still rubbing her back with his hand.

"Lee, you don't grieve for an allotted amount of time! It takes years, and sometimes, you never get over it. I still miss my Daddy. Mother does, she misses him every day," Amanda was shocked. "Your uncle should have known that! Especially when it's a little boy!"

Lee hugged her closer, "Amanda, my uncle… he's been a military man longer than he hasn't and in his job, you show no emotions. Emotions make you weak, or so I was told every day growing up. I can't fault him for that. He gave me a roof over my head when no one would or could. He is my only family left that I know of."

"But he took away your ability to be a little boy, to grieve for your parents." Amanda was beginning to get upset now. A tear slipped down her cheek.

Sitting up, Lee pulled her up into his arms, and wiped the tear from her cheek. "Hey, I thought I was the one who is supposed to be upset here?"

"I'm sorry, it just gets me so angry what he did to you," Amanda, wiped another stray tear away.

"Amanda, he did what he knew. And he loved me the only way he knew how. But now, I have you, and well, maybe you can help me move forward?" Lee asked.

Amanda looked at his face, running her hand down his cheek. "Lee, I told you, I'm here for you, whatever you need."

Talking her hand his, he brought it to his lips. "Thank you," he replied. Smiling he said, "Right now I do need something."

Amanda tilted her head and asked, "What is that?"

Lee smiled wider, his dimples deep, "Lunch."


	19. The Hike

Amanda took a quick shower, doing her best to not wet her hair before dressing again. During her shower she had a thought. Her mother was not going to be home for another few hours so dressing quickly, she walked out of the bathroom and called to Lee. "Hey, do you mind swinging by my house? Mother won't be home for a while so I can pack a few things to bring here. You know, jeans, a few sweatshirts I don't wear often so Mother wouldn't notice. I remembered I have a new robe the boys bought for me so I can just bring my old one here and tell Mother I donated it. Maybe a nightgown or two... "

Slipping his arms around her waist, Lee smiled, "You won't need the nightgowns…."

Hitting his arm gently, she slid her arms around him and hugged him, inhaling his musky scent. "I love the way you smell. It's just so… you…." she said. She didn't want to break the embrace but her stomach growled just a little bit. Lee couldn't help but hear it.

"Where do you want to get lunch? We should probably stop after your house, so we don't run into your mother if she comes home early. She has a habit of doing that." Lee nodded.

"Well, if you want, we can grab a small lunch at the house. The we can have an early dinner at Emilio's. It's been a few weeks since we've been there. I guess we're not regulars anymore." Amanda said, shaking her head at the memory of just a few short weeks ago.

"That, Amanda, sounds like a perfect plan. Do you mind if I jump in the shower before we go? It will only take me a few minutes, I promise." Lee kissed the tip of her nose, then her forehead.

"I'll clean up the kitchen while you shower." Amanda agreed.

"I, ah, I cleared the top drawer for you to keep anything you want to bring with you to keep here. And there is an extra hook in the bathroom for your robe." Lee said as he began walking toward the bathroom.

"Aww… thanks…" Amanda said softly.

Watching the bathroom door close, Amanda turned and went into the living to gather their coffee cups from earlier. In the kitchen she washed the mugs, dumped the rest of the coffee down the sink muttering, "Day old coffee, not when I'm here, Scarecrow." Carefully washing and drying the carafe as well, Amanda folded the dish towel she using and hung it on the oven handle to dry. Surveying her work, she decided the kitchen was clean. She had just walked back into the living room when Lee appeared, dressed in jeans and a long sleeve cotton shirt and sneakers. She caught her breath at the sight of him.  _Definitely wasn't just that winning personality that attracted me Scarecrow._

"Ready? I was thinking maybe on our way back we could go for a walk… a hike maybe… you know, work up an appetite." Lee suggested. He remembered she had told him how her parents used to take her to Windy Run Park. He knew exactly where it was and the weather was perfect.

"Really? That sounds perfect. Let me get my purse," Amanda was excited. What had started off as a rough, emotional morning was turning into a pretty good day.

The ride to Arlington was quick, traffic relatively light even for a Friday. Lee pulled in front of the house to park. "Feels kinda good not parking around the block," he commented. Her neighbors were familiar with his car so parking it for a few minutes wouldn't cause any alarms with them. He followed Amanda into the house, smiling.

"What?" Amanda looked at him.

"I like using the front door," is all he said. Walking inside, Lee smiled again, thinking of the night she made dinner for him. It has only been a week ago but it seemed so much longer than that.

Amanda turned to him, "You know where everything in the kitchen is so why don't you make us a couple of sandwiches and I'll put together a bag for your apartment." She turned and headed up the stairs to her bedroom at the end of the hall.

Taking her cue, Lee walked down the few steps into the kitchen, opening the refrigerator to find cold cuts in the drawer, arranged neatly in a row. Smiling and shaking his head, Lee called up to her, "Amanda, turkey or ham?"

"Ham, with mustard please. I think there is some Swiss cheese left too unless the boys got to it," she answered.

Looking again, Lee found a thin package of Swiss cheese with just enough left for two sandwiches. As he made them both ham and Swiss, he looked around her house thinking how many times he had been there, sneaking in and out so her mother didn't see him.  _Someday it won't be like this. Someday we can tell them._

Amanda broke his thought as she came down the stairs carrying a small duffle bag and a garment bag, wearing jeans and a red and white plaid shirt and sneakers. "I wasn't sure what to pack so it's mostly non work clothes, with a few other things just in case" she said as she put the bag near the front door. "We should probably get going. Mother could be here any time and well, I don't want to explain to her why I have bags packed."

Lee nodded, "I'm just finished up here anyway." He had put their sandwiches into a brown lunch bag. "We can get some drinks on the way to the park."

Amanda stopped long enough to write her mother a note explaining she may not be home that night because of work but would be home first thing in the morning for the boys baseball game. Making a quick scan of the kitchen for any crumbs or anything out of place, she turned to Lee, "Looks good, let's go."

In the car on the way to the park, Lee couldn't help but cover her hand with his as he drove. Absentmindedly, he rubbed her knuckles with his thumb. He hadn't told Amanda which park they were going to so he hoped she appreciate the surprise. She was lost in thought as they pulled into the parking area, not realizing where they were. Lee squeezed her hand to bring her to the present. "Hey, you sleeping over there?" he joked.

"No, no, just thinking… of us... " she squeezed his hand back. Looking around she realized where they were. She looked at him and just smiled. "I know the perfect spot we can have lunch." She immediately remembered a rocky outcropping about mile into the trail where her parents used to take her. It had a beautiful view of the Potomac River.

Getting a small backpack out of the back of his car, Lee put in the bag of sandwiches and the drinks they picked up on the way. Zipping it closed, he slung it across his shoulder, "Lead the way." Unconsciously she reached for his hand and together they walked the trail, hand in hand. They didn't talk much, just enjoying each other's presence. Reaching the outcropping, they found a spot away from the trail that offered some privacy.

"I can see why you suggested this spot. It's beautiful… just like you," Lee leaned forward to give her a quick kiss.

Amanda blushed. She couldn't get used to him saying things like that to her. Joe only gave her compliments when he wanted sex so like everything else in this relationship, it was new to her.

Sitting against a tree, Lee leaned back and just looked out at the river view. His life never felt better than it did at that moment. He smiled, thinking of all the times things had gone wrong and now, finally something was going right for him. Looking over at Amanda, he knew she was the reason for it. Since the first day he met her, something inside him had been unlocked, something he couldn't explain.

Amanda started telling him how her parents used to bring her here as a child and would find a spot close by to have lunch. He could tell they were fond memories but her eyes hinted at a touch of sadness as she spoke about her father. Maybe she was right, maybe sometimes you never get over grief. And maybe she was right he never had grieved. Pulling his knees up closer to his chest, he folded his arms and leaned his chin forward, thinking about his own parents. Amanda reached forward to rub his arm, comforting him. He didn't realize he needed it until she felt her wipe away the tear that had slid down his face. He covered her hand with his and simply said, "Thank you. This was the best idea for today. I think I needed this."

Amanda leaned forward to kiss his forehead. She moved to sit beside him, sliding her hand up and under his arm, her head on his shoulder. They sat like that for almost a half hour, neither one moving or wanting to move, each lost in their own thoughts. Lee was the one to finally move first, realizing he was getting stiff from sitting there. "Hey, you want to go?" he asked as he straightened one long leg then the other.

"Yeah, I think I lost feeling in my legs sitting here," she laughed.

Lee stood first, reaching his hand out to help her up. Amanda lost her balance and fell into his arms as he caught her. "Hey, careful. You ok?" Lee looked at her, almost worried.

"I'm fine, better now," she said, looking into his hazel eyes. "We should probably get going. It usually gets pretty crowded here in the afternoons, when the kids get out of school. Especially on a day like today. The weather is perfect."

"Dan predicted a good one I guess," Lee said with a smirk.

"Dean… I didn't know you watched his weather report?" she corrected him.

"I do once in awhile. Still trying to figure out what you saw in him. He's sooo boring," Lee dragged out the words to tease her.

"He wasn't boring. He's just …. Normal…" Amanda said, spreading her hands as if to explain.

"Well, I hope to never get THAT normal," Lee replied, smiling, his dimples showing fully as he did.

"See, those dimples you save just for me," Amanda commented, attempting to change the subject.

"Come on, let's go," Lee reached out to take her hand again for the walk back to the car.

Laughing, they hiked back to the car. Amanda was right, once they got to the parking lot it was nearly full, lots of families and teenagers milling about.

"What do you say, we go back to your apartment, get my car and go get some food for your place?" Amanda suggested. "Like normal people do."

"That sounds like something you would love to do, but I'd like to avoid the shopping part. So how about, you pick up some food for my apartment and I'll run a few errands. I can pick up my dry cleaning, go to the bank, swing by the agency…" he began.

"No! No agency. Billy gave you the weekend off, remember. You show up there and he's going to have a fit." Amanda reprimanded him lightly.

"Ok, ok, no agency. But I do need to do a few things. So you shop, I'll meet you back at my place in a bit. Oh, I wanted to give this to you before but it didn't seem to be the right time," Lee reached into the back pocket of his jeans to get the spare key he had for his apartment. "No more lockpicking. Even standard issue."

Amanda looked down at the key he handed her. She knew this was huge for him. She wrapped her fingers around it before looking at him. "Lee, I don't…"

"Don't say anything. Just take it, please." Lee said gently.

"I will. Do you know if you need anything for groceries or do you just want me to plan something?" Amanda asked, placing the key in the zippered compartment of her purse for now.

Pulling out his wallet, he handed her $100, "Just eggs, and half and half, the rest is up to you," Lee said.

The drive back to his apartment was filled with quiet conversation about what they should do that weekend. Amanda told him about the boys baseball game in the morning. Lee was unsure what to do because she also mentioned Joe was going to be there. Neither of them wanted to admit but Joe King was a thorn in both their sides. Together they decided it might be awkward for Lee to go. He promised her in the future he would try to get to other games. The boys only knew him as the man their mom worked with, the man the Federal Agents questioned them about and the man their mom ran off with.

Pulling in front of the building, Lee leaned over and gave Amanda a quick kiss before she got out of the car. It was just a light touch but offered a hint of what might come later. "See you in a bit," Amanda said as she climbed out of his car to get in her own. Once again, they each traveled in different directions, Lee to do his errands and Amanda to do hers, both knowing it wouldn't be long before they would be together again.


	20. Operation Normal

Amanda spent the next hour wandering around the supermarket trying to figure out what Lee may need for groceries. If she was at home, she would have looked through the cabinets, the pantry and the refrigerator to see what she was low on, what she was out of, or if she had planned her meals ahead, she knew what she needed to complete each meal. But this was Lee's house. The only thing she knew for sure he needed was eggs and half and half.

Making a decision, she mentally planned meals for him in her head. She knew she couldn't go wrong with things she knew he liked. Her first meal was dinner for that night. She decided on a simple baked chicken, mashed potatoes and green beans with gravy. Maybe a small chocolate cake for dessert. It wouldn't be homemade but the bakery in the store would have to do. From there, she moved to lunch meals for a few days. Stopping by the deli, she picked up deli meat and cheese. He didn't like breakfast but she did so she picked up some danish from the bakery.

Picking up some fresh fruit, she headed toward the checkout and remembered he needed dish soap as well as a new sponge. She realized she almost forgot his half and half too. Shaking her head, she couldn't help but think how much time she wasted going back and forth throughout the store because she didn't come in with a proper list to start.

Looking at her watch, she saw she had been in the store for almost 2 hours. "This would be much easier if we could act like a normal couple." she muttered.  _Thats it!_ Amanda had a thought. This weekend they would act as normal as they could. They didn't have to work, so that meant no cases, no reports, no KGB hopefully. Tonight would be a normal dinner, maybe followed by a movie on TV with popcorn, some snuggling on the couch, stuff normal people did. Tomorrow she did have to leave to go to the boys baseball game but that didn't mean the rest of the weekend couldn't be normal. OK, maybe lying to her family to spend time with Lee wasn't normal but she couldn't help that.

Smiling at her plan, she checked out at the store, loaded her car and drove back to his apartment. She parked in front of the building, seeing his car was already there. Taking one bag with her, she left the rest of the groceries for Lee to help carry up. Remembering the key he had given her earlier, she took it out of her purse and unlocked the door.

Lee was sitting on the couch when he heard the keys and jumped up, immediately in defensive mode. As the door opened, he saw Amanda and relaxed. He had already forgotten he had given her the key. Getting up, he started to take the grocery bag from her when she stopped him. Handing him her car keys she said, "There are 6 more in the car. I'll put this one down and come help you."

"Amanda, what in the world did you buy? Seven bags of groceries? It's just me and you know most of the time, I get takeout or something at work," he groaned at her.

"Lee you handed me one hundred dollars to get groceries. Eggs and half and half don't cost one hundred dollars. So for this weekend we are going to eat like normal people, dinner at home, breakfast.." Amanda started to explain. Lee rolled his eyes and nodded his head when she said breakfast. "Yes, breakfast and lunch like normal people. I think you've forgotten…"

"Forgotten? Amanda I think you forget. I lived as a military brat, then moved to college and from there, I became an agent. Nothing I have done in my life could be considered normal," Lee chuckled.

"Well, for this weekend, we are going to be normal…. As normal as we can anyway. Now come help me," Amanda commanded.

"Okay, okay. Sounds like I don't have a choice anyway," Lee followed her back down to her car. He picked up 4 of the bags, she got the last two and together they brought them back to his apartment and started sorting out her purchases.

"Amanda, I can't believe you did this. There are things here I don't think I've ever bought. Jiffy-pop popcorn? I don't think I've had that since I was a kid on base. Barney made it for me for my birthday one year. What are you planning?" Lee looked at her, eyebrow raised.

"I was thinking a nice dinner at home, movie and popcorn on the couch, and then lets go from there. Normal," Amanda stated firmly.

"Normal? Sounds like you have made a case for us, Mrs. King. And Normal is our code word, is that it?" Lee teased.

"No, no cases, no code words. Just... " as Amanda started to say her last word, Lee said it with her… "Normal." Laughing, they finished putting away the groceries, Lee amazed at everything she bought. She had thought of everything, including a new sponge.

"So, what's the first part of Operation Normal, Mrs. King?" Lee was determined to tease her.

"Dinner. Baked chicken, mashed potatoes, green beans," Amanda said. Handing him the bag of potatoes and a peeler she said, "We need 3 good sized one."

"Amanda? I thought we decided to go to Emelio's for dinner?" Lee sounded disappointed.

"We can go to Emelio's tomorrow night. Call it Date Night. But tonight, we do dinner at home," she said still holding the bag out to him.

But, potato peeling, really?" Lee hated peeling potatoes. When he was a kid, Barney and the Colonel used it as punishment.

"Yes, because normal people peel potatoes," she said, smiling.

"Okay, okay, but for the record, I hate peeling potatoes," Lee said as he took the bag and peeler from her. He found the three largest ones he could, washed them and began to peel them. Amanda got a pot out of the cabinet and filled it with cold water, leaving it on the counter for him.

After looking at the clock, Amanda finished putting the rest of the groceries away, folding the grocery bags into a neat pile. Lee had finished peeling and looked around to see what else she needed him to do. "You're in my way," she said laughing.

"Well, I can't help my kitchen isn't as big as yours," he teased. "You're the one who told me to peel the potatoes."

Shoving him out of the kitchen she suggested, "Maybe you should vacuum?"

"Amanda? Vacuum? I have a cleaning lady that does that for me," Lee just shook his head.

"Normal people do not have a cleaning lady. Normal people vacuum their own rugs, their own furniture," she pointed out.

"Amanda? She was here the other day so…" Lee looked around to see what he could do that she would consider normal… "What if I washed the sheets on my bed? Is that normal enough or you?"

"Perfectly. Do you have another set to make the bed when you take them off?" she asked.

"Yes, Amanda, I have many sets of sheets for my bed. Would you prefer 1500 count Egyptian Cotton or Satin?" he asked with a smile, his eyebrow raised.

"Do you have any flannel? I heard it might get cold tonight…" Amanda looked him straight in the eye calling his bluff.

"I'll get the grey striped cotton ones," he answered, breaking eye contact.  _Round 1 goes to Amanda._

Walking into his bedroom, Lee smiled, as he stripped his bed, putting the sheets into a laundry basket he pulled out of his closet. Taking the grey striped sheets from the top shelf, he proceeded to remake the bed. Walking back through the living room, he put the basket on the couch and headed back to the kitchen. He stopped and leaned against the doorframe, crossing his arms, watching Amanda. She was preparing the chicken, something so simple, so NORMAL, but she was so beautiful. Amanda caught his eye, stepped into the doorway to give him a light kiss on his cheek before turning back to finish what she was doing.

The next hour was spent finishing dinner preparations and folding the now clean sheets with light conversation scattered in. They talked about work, people at work and some of their old cases. With dinner just about ready, Lee set the table for her as she took the chicken out of the oven and started making plates. He poured two glasses of Pinot Noir and brought the wine bottle to the table.

Taking his first bite, Lee closed his eyes, "Amanda, how is it, you can make normal seem so perfect?"

"Lee, it's just baked chicken. Nothing special," Amanda tried to downplay his compliment.

"No really. I thought I wanted to go out to Emelio's and have dinner there but, this…. THIS is what I wanted. Just being here with you is what I want. And a delicious meal that didn't cost a small fortune is just a bonus," Lee reached over to hold her hand as he spoke. "I think I like normal," he said as he kissed her fingers.

"Good because normal means you are on dish duty," Amanda smiled. She was really enjoying this evening. She felt completely in her element. The only thing missing was her boys fighting over seconds. She felt torn at that thought. She loved her boys but her relationship with Lee was a different kind of love. And one she wanted to explore more. She didn't know what would happen with them in the future so for right now, she wanted to embrace every second.

"Oh, is that why you bought a new sponge? Did you have that planned, Mrs. King?" Lee was watching her. Something flashed through her eyes, just for a brief second. Sadness maybe but he couldn't be sure.

"No, Scarecrow, I don't plan that far in advance," she replied, a small smile on her lips.

Together they cleared the table, and as Lee washed the dishes, Amanda dried and put them away. Walking into the living room, they debated what movie to watch that evening. They decided "Romancing the Stone" was a perfect compromise of action, comedy and romance.

"Jiffy pop?" Amanda asked.

"Only if I make it? Barney never let me make it," Lee said with a smile.

"Pop away until your heart's content," Amanda giggled. Watching him make popcorn, Amanda became aware of how many normal family traditions he had missed out on. Her boys loved making popcorn on Friday nights to watch movies. For them it was normal.

Laughing, they made popcorn and watched the movie, snuggled up together on the couch, stealing kisses once in awhile. As the credits for the movie rolled, Lee reached over for the remote and turned the tv off. "Amanda, this…. Thank you."

"Operation Normal, day one a success?" Amanda teased, running her fingers across his lips.

"Well, how does one end a normal day?" Lee pulled one of her fingers in his mouth to gently suck on it.

Gasping lightly, Amanda pulled her fingers out of his mouth to cover it with her own. "That depends…" she said between kisses, "are we going to be interrupted at any point?"

"Not that I can think of," he whispered as he kissed her neck, down to the V neck of her shirt.

"Then, we should head into the other room and get ready for bed," she could barely think never mind get the words out.

"Did you bring your pajamas?" Lee was beginning to unbutton her shirt, lightly touching the exposed skin underneath.

"No, you told me not to…" Amanda whispered in his ear.

Scooping her up in his arms, Lee carried Amanda to his bedroom. Setting her on his bed, she stood, taller than him, wrapping her arms around him, pulling him close. Using her increased height to his advantage, Lee finished unbuttoning her shirt, pulling it off her and tossing it toward his laundry hamper. Reaching behind her, he unbuttoned her bra, pulling it off both arms, tossing it in the same direction.

Smoothing his hands across her ribs, he took her breasts in his hands, holding them. Leaning forward, he pulled one nipple into his mouth. Amanda gasped, arching her back and pulling him closer to her. Taking her cue, Lee quickly removed his shirt and unbuttoned his jeans to relieve some of the tension building there. Amanda leaned forward to hold his face with her hands as she kissed him. "Lee…. jeans…." she whispered huskily.

Without a second thought, he unbuttoned her jeans and began peeling them down her legs, taking her panties with them. Shaking her feet free, Amanda used Lee's shoulders to brace herself as she stepped down off the edge of the bed. Seeing his pants already unbuttoned, she unzipped them, slipping her hand inside to squeeze his length. "Amanda…. Is this… what…. Normal people do…." he whispered between clenched teeth.

"Completely normal…." she answered back, as she leaned down to strip him of his pants and boxers. Standing back up to her full height she ran her fingers up his stomach and chest, around his neck to pull him to her again for a deep kiss.

"And this?" Lee asked as he kissed her back, sliding his hands down past her butt to pull her against him.

"Mmm-hmmm," she answered.

Lee's mind was racing. What could he do to throw her off her "normal" kick that she was on? Then it came to him. Kissing her deeply, he released her, walking over to the bedside table to get a condom. Walking back to her, he wrapped his arms around her again, kissing her passionately. As he trailed kisses down her neck, he opened the packet and removed the condom with two fingers. Distracting her by running his other hand across her chin and into her hair, he slid the condom on himself. Using both hands, he lifted her up and carried her the few steps across the room to lean against the wall. He guided her legs to wrap around him as he lowered her onto his straining manhood.

Pushing her against the wall for leverage, Lee began moving at a moderate pace. Amanda wrapped her arms around his neck for balance, locking her heels behind him. Rocking her own hips in combination with his upward thrusts, the two began a steady climb up the climatic ladder. As Lee was beginning to get closer to his own release he knew he needed to make an adjustment if Amanda was going to stay with him for the journey. Without losing pace, he carried her back to the bed and the two fell still locked together, Lee's knees on the edge of the bed. Taking advantage of this new position, he was able to increase the speed of his strokes, pushing Amanda closer to the edge. Her hips were moving on their own accord, trying to push the limit.

"Amanda..." Lee tried to talk but couldn't. Amanda rocked her hips faster to match his thrusts.

"Lee….just a little…" Amanda needed just a little more, just a slightly different angle to reach the pinnacle they were both searching for. Unhooking her feet from behind him, Lee slipped his arm under one knee, pulling her leg closer to her shoulder. It was exactly what she needed. She tensed up immediately, the fire that had been building exploding outward. Shaking, she continued to rock her hips until she felt him stiffen harder inside her, his breath coming in gasps, and after a few more shuddered thrusts, he stilled.

Realizing the position they were locked in, Lee moved his arms so she could lower her leg as he rolled off her. Doing what he now called "the check", he confirmed the condom was in one piece before tossing it into the trash beside the bed. Reaching up behind him, he pulled the comforter down enough for them to climb into bed, exhausted.

"Amanda…. Was that still?" Lee started to tease her.

"Definitely not in my version of normal," she sighed. Laughing he pulled her close, wrapping his arms around her as he began to fall asleep.


	21. Operation Normal Day 2

The next morning, Amanda woke up before Lee. At some point during the night they had separated from each other, Lee on his back, Amanda rolled onto her side. His foot was resting on top of the comforter, one arm above his head. Carefully getting off the bed to not disturb him, Amanda looked down at him. He looked so peaceful, so calm. She knew he wasn't really a breakfast eater but he did like his morning coffee.

Checking the clock, she didn't have much time before she needed to meet her mother at the ball field for the boys' game. Quietly, she left the bedroom and went into the kitchen to make coffee. Once it was starting to brew, she headed back to his room to hopefully shower without waking him. Passing through the room, he had rolled onto his side but was still asleep when she gently closed the bathroom door. Turning on the shower, she hoped it wouldn't wake him. He needed to rest, he never got enough sleep when they were working.

After taking a minute to relieve herself, she climbed into the hot shower, appreciating the pressure on her skin. She had just finished rinsing her hair when she heard the shower curtain rustle to the side.

"Thought you were going to sneak out on me?" Lee stood there, hair messed up, his face still relaxed, smiling. "That's usually my job."

"Hey. No, I wasn't sneaking. I have to meet Mother and the boys at the field, remember? Coffee should be ready," Amanda said as she stood there, running her fingers through her hair. It was odd, she didn't feel the least bit self conscious standing in Lee's shower, completely naked.

As Lee stood there watching her, he could feel himself growing harder than his normal morning erection. He wanted nothing more than to step into the shower and make love her right then and there but he knew she had to leave to be with her family too. "How much time do you have?" he asked, hoping she had a few minutes. He knew it wouldn't take long.

"Before I have to leave? About 20 minutes," she replied, eyeing him. His eyes had turned the bright green she loved and she knew immediately what he was thinking.

Glancing toward the open doorway and back to Amanda in the shower, Lee was debating if he would lose too much time going to get a condom and coming back. Amanda must have sensed what he was thinking because she pulled the shower curtain open more and stated, "We'll make it work."

Without a second thought, he stepped into the stream of hot water with her, pulling her close to kiss her. Amanda ran her hands up his chest, circling her arms around his neck. Knowing time was an issue, she made a decision she knew he would be surprised about but hoped he would still enjoy.

Letting go of his neck, she reached down between them, wrapping her fingers around him to gently stroke him. Lee leaned his head back and gasped. Between the warmth of her hand and the hot water he almost lost it right then and there. Amanda sensed that and quickly turned around, leaning her hips back toward him. Lee shook his head, "Amanda…. No… we don't…" he tried to say. He remembered one of the first conversations they had about her and Joe's sex life.

"Lee, if you don't move now, we are going to run out of time. Besides…. You are not Joe and this is my decision," she reached behind her to pull him closer.

"But we don't…. You …. A-man-da…." Lee couldn't even put into words what he was trying to say. He knew from experience this was going to be fast and she wouldn't be able to enjoy it as much as he'd like her to.

"Last chance, Scarecrow," she said firmly.

"Aw hell," he grunted as he pulled her hips to him, burying himself deep within her. Amanda put her hands on the shower wall for balance as he pumped into her. She smiled as she heard him groan. "Amanda, my God." Lee could barely keep himself at a steady pace. Gripping her hips tighter, he pumped faster, feeling the tension building in his groin. At the last second, he pulled out, emptying himself on her butt cheek, rubbing the head of his penis on her as he did. Putting his own hand on the wall for balance, he leaned forward to kiss her shoulder, "You are amazing," he finally said.

"And you owe me one for later," she said as she turned around to face him. "Now, I have to wash myself off here and get ready or I'm going to be late." She practically pushed him out of the shower.

"I owe you more than you know, Amanda King," he said. Stepping out, he dried himself off with a towel before putting his bathrobe on. "I'll pour you coffee…" he offered as he left that bathroom.

Finishing her shower in just a few minutes, Amanda dried herself off and got dressed in record time. Walking out to the living room with her sneakers in her hand, she sat on the edge of the couch to put them on. Lee brought her a cup of coffee and a slice of danish on a plate. "Breakfast is the most important meal of the day," he teased.

"And the morning quickie in the shower is a great way to start the day," she teased right back.

Lee laughed, "Two words I never thought I'd hear you say - morning quickie. But I will make it up to you. We are still on for dinner tonight at Emelio's, right?"

"Yes, dinner at Emelio's although I don't think I'll be able to spend the night again. Mother is already suspicious," Amanda replied. Glancing at her watch, she quickly stood up, "Oh, I have to go. I'll eat this in the car. Thank you." She kissed him lightly on the cheek before picking up her purse, taking the coffee cup with her. "I'll bring this back later."

"Amanda?" Lee called before she closed the door. "Is this morning still normal?" he joked.

"Perfectly. I'll see you later," she smiled at him as she closed the door behind her.

Amanda spent the rest of the morning cheering on her boys at the game and then cheering them up after the loss. Pizza and ice cream for lunch seemed to do the trick along with a promise they could spend the night at a friend's house if they cleaned their room.

Back at the house, the boys ran up the stairs loudly. Amanda called up after them, "Remember boys, that room better be ship shape or no going over to Tommy's house for the night. And you both need to shower too. Don't forget to pack your toothbrushes." Walking back down the stairs to the kitchen she muttered, "I know they are going to forget their toothbrushes."

"Amanda, you know as well as I know, they will bring their toothbrushes but they are not going to use them. They are boys and well… " Dottie began

"I know, Mother, boys will be boys." Amanda laughed.

"And it's perfectly normal for them to behave like that. When you were a child, now that was a different story. You couldn't do anything without brushing your teeth twice a day because that's what Doctor Goodman told you to do and you were not about to go against Doctor Goodman," Dottie reminisced.

"I know, I remember, but the boys have other ideas. I'm lucky if they remember to brush their hair, never mind their teeth. It's a shame they lost that game today," Amanda tried to change the subject.

"I know, this is the same team that beat them last year in the playoff games. But what can you do when the coach is also a coach for the high school team too? A little unfair if you ask me, but what do I know?" Dottie threw her hands in the hair.

"Well, Mother, we have to remember that the coaches are volunteers and only so many fathers volunteer. They have to take what they can get." Amanda knew her mother was getting worked up over this game so she tried to change the subject one more time. "Now that the boys are going to be gone tonight are you going to make plans to go out?"

"Amanda? What makes you think I didn't already have plans to go out? Hmmmm?" Dottie said slyly.

"Oh really, and who did you have plans to go out with?" Amanda called her bluff.

"I will be heading out dancing with a few members of the bridge club. There is that new place that just opened up in Georgetown we are dying to try," Dottie sounded so excited.

"Really, Mother, do you think driving all the way over to Georgetown is going to be safe? You don't like driving at night…" Amanda commented.

"Who said I was driving? Besides, you may need to car. After all, you may get a call to go to work… some late night assignment they seem to love sending you on. You know, Amanda, I've got a mind to call someone at IFF and complain about that. I mean, they do realize you have two boys at home don't they?" Dottie's voice started to raise, which usually meant she was getting worked up.

"Don't worry, Mother. I'm sure it's just because I have the least experience. You know, low man on the totem pole kind of thing. It won't be like this much longer I wouldn't think." Amanda tried to cover up for a bit.

Just as Dottie started to say something else the phone rang, cutting her off. Lifting the receiver, she answered, "Hello? Yes, yes, she's right here," Dottie said as she started handing Amanda the phone. Whispering, "I'm pretty sure it's Mr. Stetson," her eyebrows were completely raised.

"Mother…. Can you go check on the boys please while I take this?" Amanda tried to get her to leave.

"I suppose…. And I'm sure you will have to go running off to handle something…." Dottie called loudly as she walked up the stairs.

Turning back to the phone, Amanda said, "Hi…"

"I've got something, but I don't know if you can handle it," Lee joked, hearing Dottie's comment.

Amanda just laughed, "Yeah, like I handled it this morning?" she tossed back at him reminding him of their activity in the shower.

"And I owe you for that too. How was the baseball game?" Lee asked.

Sighing, Amanda told him, "Well, the boys' team lost but they're still on track for the playoffs. What did you do all morning?"  _Normal conversation_  she thought.

"Well, after you left I read the newspaper, showered, made the bed. Then I went and had my car detailed. I came back, washed some clothes that were in the laundry hamper… your's included by the way…. Picked up a sandwich for lunch at the deli down the street and now I'm talking to you," Lee said matter of factly.

"Wow, sounds like you had a pretty normal day," she teased.

"I guess you can say that. Except the woman I was with ran out on me this morning," Lee loved the game they were playing.

"I didn't run out on …" Amanda started but stopped when she heard Dottie coming down the stairs. "Mother, how are the boys doing?"

Dottie looked at her strangely. "The boys are almost done picking up their laundry…. Do you need some privacy to finish your phone call with… Mr. Stetson?"

"No, Mother but I will have to go out in a bit for work. You were right, he's calling to tell me where the location is. Are you sure you don't need my car?" Amanda lied. On the other end of the phone, Lee was grinning, trying hard not to laugh.

"No, no. I told you I didn't need it. Will you be gone all night?" Dottie asked, again, eyebrow raised.

"I don't think so. I might be home late but not all night. Last night was a pretty long night in the editing room so we must have to refilm something. There was a lot of blurry footage," Amanda was making things up on the spot. She hated lying but it was easier this way, for now.

"Uh-huh… blurry footage…. Well, whatever, you're an adult…" Dottie walked away, shaking her head.

Turning back to the phone, Amanda asked, "What time do you need me to meet you?"

Lee was practically busting at the seams listening to Amanda and her mother. "Blurry footage? What were we filming, Bigfoot?"

"Do you want me to meet you or not?" Amanda said firmly. It was bad enough she had to lie to her mother, now Lee was teasing her about it.

Trying to contain himself, he said, "Yes, how about 5:00 at my apartment. We can get changed here and head to Emelio's for an early dinner. That way your mother won't be suspicious if you are dressed up when you leave the house."

"Should I bring anything in particular?" Amanda asked. Lee never usually minded what she wore but she figured he might have an opinion for tonight.

"Well, I do love that black dress… you know the one with the spaghetti straps…" Lee hinted.

"Oh, the one similar to the one you bought for Leslie that time," Amanda reminded him.

_Ouch._ "Yeah, that one… I was going to say is too dressy…"  _Bad call, Scarecrow._ "I'm sure you will look beautiful in anything you wear." Lee knew he messed that one up.  _I need to get her flowers…._

"Uh-huh. Ok then, I'll see you there around 5. Bye bye," Amanda rushed off the phone as her mother walked through the room again. "Sorry, Mother, I've got to meet them at 5:00. I can drop the boys off at Tommy's on my way."

"All right, darling. I'm sure whatever it is you are working on is very important. But really, sweetheart, you need to get out more, go on a date, something. All you seem to do lately is work." Dottie looked sadly at her daughter.

"It's just pretty… normal stuff, Mother. Listen, I'm going to run upstairs and get the boys moving. I might bring a change of clothes so I don't get my car ruined in case something happens. I always seem to find the dirtiest spot to land it…." Amanda hoped her mother wouldn't ask any more questions.

"I've noticed that lately," Dottie looked at her again. "Are you sure everything is…"

"Everything is FINE, Mother," Amanda called running up the stairs. "Boys? Are you in the shower yet?"

The next hour was a flurry of activity in the King household. Amanda managed to pack a blue dress with matching jacket and slingback silver heels, folding it carefully into a small duffle bag so her mother wouldn't be suspicious. The boys each had packed an overnight bag along with their sleeping bags and with only a handful of repeated reminders, they had their toothbrushes and a comb for their hair. Getting the boys in the car and over to Tommy's house went smoothly and Amanda pulled up at Lee's apartment just before 5:00.


	22. Date night

Grabbing the small duffle bag, Amanda made her way up to Lee's apartment. Slipping the key into the lock, she shook her head. It was almost surreal, her and Lee together, letting herself into his apartment with a key of her own. She was lost in thought as the door swung open, Lee standing there watching her.

"Hey… are you going to stand out there all night?" Lee looked at, head tilted, trying to figure out what was going through her mind.

"Hi… Sorry. I was just thinking," she stepped in, giving him a light kiss on the cheek.

"Nothing bad I hope."

"No, nothing bad," Amanda blushed. "You look nice." Amanda noted his well pressed charcoal gray suit, blue tie, cream colored shirt. "Gotta hot date?" she teased.

Pulling her into his arms, he kissed her, "Maybe. It depends if she shows up. I mean, she did run out on me this morning." Lee wanted to see how far she would go with this game.

Amanda kissed him back, nibbling on his bottom lip just a little as she did. "Well that's just terrible. Is there anything I can do to, um, make it easier on you?"

"Well, I do owe her for a.. Ah…. gift she gave me this morning…" Lee began kissing her jawline.

"A gift… well… I don't know if I can accept a gift for someone else," Amanda sighed knowing if they didn't stop this game now they would never make it to dinner.

Stepping back, Lee picked up a bouquet of flowers sitting on the table beside the door. "Oh, so you wouldn't like these?" he asked, trying hard to sound dejected.

Smiling, she looked back and forth between him and the flowers, "Lee, those are beautiful. You didn't have to get me flowers." Taking the bouquet, she walked toward the kitchen. "Do you have a vase I can put them in some water for now? I don't want them to wilt before I get them home later."

Following her into the kitchen, he said, "Amanda, I just wanted to thank you for this morning. You know, in the shower. What you did…" Reaching into a cabinet he got a vase and handed it to her.

"Lee, I did what I did because I wanted to. I wanted… you…" Amanda filled the vase with water, trying to avoid eye contact for the moment.

"But Amanda, you know you didn't want it like that…. That wasn't going to …. Satisfy you….." Lee tried again, his hands in the air.

She finished filling the vase and putting the bouquet inside, she turned to look at him, she put her hands on the lapel of his coat, "Lee, this morning wasn't about… me… I knew I only had a few minutes and well… I knew you were in need of … my assistance this morning and well, it worked didn't it?"

"Amanda… assistance? Is that what you call it?" Lee almost sounded angry.

"Lee, please…. Let's go have a nice dinner and then, " she stepped forward, sliding her hands under the lapels and around his neck, "you can assist me in my problem."

Pulling her close to kiss her, "And what problem is that?"

Smiling, she whispered into his lips, "I need to be properly satisfied."

Lee growled into her mouth as he teased her lips open with his tongue. Pressing himself against her, she could feel the evidence of his desire.

"Lee, I need to get changed," she reminded him gently.

"We could just stay here…. Order in…." Lee kissed her cheek, behind her ear.

"Date night… normal…. Dinner….. Remember?" she was fully committed to keeping the time table they had planned earlier in the day, no matter how much he tempted her.

Stepping back, he let his hands slide down her arms to hold her hands. "Date night…. Ok ok, go get dressed." He didn't let go until she stepped too far out of his grasp.

Taking the duffle bag into Lee's bedroom, she closed the door so she could get changed in private. Lee stood in the living room, shaking his head.

Ten minutes later, he was pacing, checking his watch, and pacing again. Walking to the door, he knocked, "Amanda? I made a reservation and if we don't leave soon we are going to be late. Norman said they were busy today."

Amanda opened the door slowly, watching his face as he took her in. The blue dress hugged her slim body in all the right places, ending right above her knee. The thin straps crisscrossed her bare back. She was carrying the matching jacket in her hand as she walked out of the room. Lee inhaled sharply, shaking his head. "Amanda, you look… wow. Much better choice than that black dress."

Blushing lightly, Amanda smiled slowly, "You like it? I made it a while ago. I just haven't had a place or time to wear it I guess."

"Another one of a kind, Amanda original…. Well, I'm glad you wore it for me… for us." Lee ran the back of his fingers lightly down her arm. "Let's go to dinner because I have a feeling I am going to enjoy taking you out of it later."

Taking his hand, she walked toward the door. "Lead the way, Scarecrow."

Dinner at Emelios' was a quiet private affair, the two tucked in the back booth, holding hands across the table. As before they ordered a salad for each of them, pasta entree to split. Lee couldn't take his eye off her the entire time they were there. They talked about the boys game, her mother's evening plan. Lee told her a few more stories from his childhood on base, most of which Amanda felt sad for him. Amanda fed Lee the last bite, and as the waitress brought them the check, she was practically on edge in anticipation of what was going to happen back at his apartment.

Lee held the car door open for her, whistling low as she stepped down to sit, appreciating the flash of her long shapely legs. Amanda heard him and decided she was going to make their ride back to his apartment interesting to say the least. As soon as Lee slid into his seat, she reached for his tie to pull him close for a kiss that was filled with promise. Lee put the car in gear, and as he pulled the car into traffic, reached for her hand. Amanda avoided his reach, instead, sliding her hand onto his thigh.

"Amanda…." Lee glanced at her. She was sitting, slightly turned toward him, legs crossed only at her ankles. Her left hand warmed a path on his hip as she gently rubbed his thigh, distracting him. "You… ah…. Have something in mind I see?" he asked, smiling.

"I don't know what you're talking about?" she answered as innocently as she could.

"Uh-huh. Your hand…. Is it cold?" Lee breathed slowly. They still had a few miles to go and she was distracting him completely.

"No…" Sliding her hand a little higher , she brushed his inner thigh lightly.

Stopping for a red light, Lee had to push back slightly in his seat to adjust his rapidly tightening pants. Seeing this reaction, Amanda smiled and looked out the window, her hand still on his leg. Deciding two could play at this game, Lee reached over and ran his hand over her hip, down to her knee and back up again. As the light turned green, Amanda took things up another notch but moving her all the way up his inner thigh, giving it a gentle squeeze. Lee hit the gas inadvertently. Feeling the car surge forward, Amanda stifled a laugh.

"Finding this funny are you?" Lee looked over at her, smiling himself. "Just you wait…"

"I'm waiting, Scarecrow… I'm waiting," Amanda laughed loudly now. Knowing they were only a mile from the apartment, Amanda made her move. She turned completely in her seat to face him giving her more space and arm reach. She slid her hand completely over him to cup his very obvious desire in her hand, squeezing him gently through the material of his pants.

"Woah, Amanda… I…." Lee bucked his hips into her hand. "You might want to hold that thought for a few more minutes… I still have to get out of the car and into the building in one piece… unless you want all my neighbors to know what's happening in my apartment tonight. Not that a beautiful woman in that dress wouldn't give them any ideas of their own." Teasing her one more time, he ran his hand over her hip to grasp her butt. Giving it a quick squeeze, he moved his hand to hers to remove it from his lap.

Pulling the vette into a spot in front of the building, he took her hand in his, brushing his lips across her knuckles. Looking into her brown eyes, he could see they were dark with desire. "Amanda if I can ask you for a favor, we can get inside a lot faster," he said.

Perplexed, Amanda raised an eyebrow, "What favor would that be?"

Taking a deep breath he said, "Let me carry your jacket inside for you."

"Why do you need to do that? I can carry my own jacket," Amanda was confused.

"Well, if I can carry your jacket for you, I can …. Um…. cover myself up a little here and we won't have to sit in the car any longer than necessary…. Unless you want to wait lon…" Lee teased slowly.

Amanda took her jacket off and handed it to him quickly, "Here." Not even waiting for him to open the door for her, she got out of the car, taking her keys out of her purse.

Lee laughed, shaking his head. Folding her jacket, he looked around before opening his car door. Getting out of the car, he draped the fabric over his arms, strategically placing it in front of him. Closing the car door, he practically ran after Amanda. Catching her before she got to the elevator, he slipped his hand to her lower back to guide her. His neighbor held the door for them. "Mr. Stetson, here, let me get that for you. Big night tonight?"

Amanda answered quickly, "No, not really, just a dinner date night… for work… I just forgot something in Mr. Stetson's apartment that I have to retrieve."

"Oh, oh that's too bad. You make a beautiful couple," the older gentleman said.

Amanda blushed and Lee looked down at her jacket carefully placed in front of him, his desire still very visible. "Thank you, Mr…. " Lee realized he had no idea what his neighbor's name was.

"Verna, John Verna. We haven't formally met," Mr. Verna held his hand out. "I live across the hall."

Lee reached around Amanda to shake hands politely. "Lee Stetson, and this is my partner… co-worker… Amanda King."

Just then the door opened to their floor. Amanda stepped out first, Lee behind her still and Mr. Verna just steps behind him. "Well, have a good night folks," Mr. Verna stopped at his door to unlock it as Lee and Amanda took the last few steps to Lee's door.

Amanda used her key again to unlock the door and as soon as they stepped inside, Lee closed and locked the door, tossing her jacket onto the table. Wrapping Amanda up in his arms, he pushed her against the wall to kiss her passionately. He couldn't touch her enough, his hands running down her back, to the curve of her butt, pulling her tight against him.

"Lee, hmmm…. Let's…. Oh….. move away from the door at least…." Amanda gasped between kisses.

Growling, Lee picked her up and carried her to the bedroom. Setting her back onto her feet, he shook his hands out of his suit coat, tossing it aside. "Amanda… all that… teasing in the car… " he was breathing heavy.

"Who was teasing?" she whispered. "I told you, this morning in the shower… I wanted… you… so… what are you waiting for?" She ran her hands up his chest to his tie and started pulling it loose.

"Amanda," Lee pulled her close for another deep kiss. Holding her face in his hands, he sprinkled her lips, her cheeks, her chin with light kisses. Sliding his hands down her shoulders, he hooked his fingers under the straps of her dress, pulling it down until it pooled around her feet. Amanda managed to get his tie off, and the buttons on his shirt undone, pulling the shirt off him and tossing it to the side.

There was an energy between them, hot, electric. Running her hands across his bare chest, she lowered her mouth to his neck. Gently biting him with her teeth, Lee inhaled sharply. He reached out to cup her breast in his hand, running his thumb across her tightening nipple.

"Ohhh," Amanda pulled back, his touch feeling like electricity on her sensitive skin.

"Amanda, what? Did I hurt you?" Lee let go immediately, concern showing on his face.

"No, no, just sensitive…. Very sensitive…." Amanda assured him. Running her fingers across his chest again, she looked into his very green eyes. Sliding her hands down, she pulled on his belt to release it. Still staring into his eyes, she unbuttoned and unzipped his pants, reaching inside to touch him. Lee closed his eyes and dropped his head back. Seeing his reaction, she pushed his pants down to his ankles and giving his boxers a tug, sent those down as well. She sat on the edge of the bed, still wearing nothing but the satin panties and the silver heels she had worn.

Lee opened his eyes and started to look down at her when she reached out to wrap her fingers around his length. He couldn't talk, he just shook his head slowly. Amanda leaned forward and began a slow exploration of his pulsing organ. She licked a trail, following a vein from base to tip before taking him in her mouth. Lee ran his hand up her shoulder to bury his fingers in her hair. As soon as she slid him deeper into her mouth, he exhaled loudly, not realizing he was holding his breath. Hearing this, she smiled, and continued to squeeze him as she rolled her tongue around him. "Amanda…. I'm … not…. This…. Ohhh…." he tried to talk but he was having a hard time finding the words. Instead, he put his hand on her chin to lead her up.

Taking his cue, Amanda rose to stand, sliding her hands up his smooth chest again. Kicking off his shoes and shaking his pants to the floor, he kicked them off to the side. His hand was still buried in her hair, the other caressed its way back down her body. Lifting one leg then the other, he slid off his socks and tossed them in the direction of the rest of his clothes. Amanda smiled shyly, looking up at him through partially closed eyelids. She licked a slow line from the soft spot on his neck, behind his ear and nibbled on the sensitive skin with her teeth. Lee groaned again, pulling her tight to him before reaching down to slip his hand below the waistband of her satin panties. He began to tease her neck with slow, suckling kisses, all while moving his hand further still down to find her soft curls and tight heated center.

Amanda wrapped her arms around his neck for balance as she dropped her head to the side, giving him more access to the soft skin. With one finger, he began to tease her, slipping inside her center just a little bit, then back out, curling back against her sensitive bundle of nerves. It wasn't long before she was shaking, barely able to stand. With one hand still holding her head, his fingers in her hair, he changed his technique to include a second finger, each time pushing inside just a tiny bit more, the movement a little faster than before.

Amanda's breath was shallow, she was holding him tightly when the first wave of pleasure hit, almost buckling her knees. Leaning her back toward the bed, Lee lowered her gently while still manipulating his fingers as she was still shaking. Kneeling down, he quickly removed her satin panties, slid off her shoes and replaced his fingers with his mouth, quickly building her to a second orgasm in just minutes.

Amanda could barely move, speaking was out of the question. Her body was still twitching as Lee pulled her up toward the pillows, wrapping his arms around her as she found her way down from the beautiful high he had sent her on. He was kissing her cheeks, her forehead, her neck all while whispering, "I love you, Amanda."

She finally got her breathing under control and reached up to touch her hand to his face. "I love you." she said huskily.

"You okay?" Lee asked, wondering how much further he could tease her. He stilled "owed" her from the shower and wanted to make sure she was paid back tenfold.

"Uh huh…" was all she could reply.

"Ready for more?" Lee asked, laughing lightly, knowing he was teasing her.

"Uh huh…." again.

Rolling onto his side, Lee began gently stroking her skin, lightly down her ribs, across her stomach, up between her breasts, circling toward her sensitive nipples which were already pulled tight. Taking her breast in his hand, he couldn't help notice they felt slightly fuller, and by her reaction again, more sensitive. Very very lightly, he licked her hardened nipple then gently blew on it, causing goosebumps across her skin and the hand she had on his arm to squeeze tightly. Repeating this action several times, she began squirming again under him, calling his name. It wasn't until he rolled her tight sensitive skin in his fingers again did she arch her back, shaking once more.

_Wow, that's never happened before._ Lee stroked his hand down her body toward her center again to find her drenched in juices, waiting for him.

"Amanda, I need to get…" Lee started to explain he needed to get a condom but she stopped him with a finger on his lips.

"No… I need…. I want… you…. Nothing between us…. It's safe now." Amanda could barely breathe but a quick count of days in her head and she knew they didn't need protection. Today was day 22 of her cycle and she knew the chance of her getting pregnant - if she wasn't already - were slim to none.

"Amanda, are you sure? It will only take…" Lee shook his head, not believing what she was saying. But then again, this morning in the shower she didn't stop him either.

"Lee…. please…." she was practically begging him. Her body was on fire, she needed a release… a bigger one than she the few she already had. Tension had built to a breaking point, she just needed him to push her over.

Not wanting to disappoint her, Lee settled himself between her legs and rested just at her entrance. Amanda arched her back, and wiggled her hips, trying to get him to bury himself in her. Again, she begged him, "Please… I need…. Lee…."

Lee smiled, looking down at her. Her eyes were so dark with passion, her hair damp around her face. Taking her hand in his, he held it tightly as he buried himself to the hilt in one swift move. Amanda immediately arched up into him, her free hand wrapping around to his back, drawing a line from his neck to his waist.

Slowly, inch by inch he pulled back only to drive himself back in quickly. Amanda wrapped her legs around his, trying to urge him deeper, faster. But Lee had more control than she did at the moment. He could feel how her body tensed around him each time he sank into her and how it tried to hold him as he pulled back. It was exquisite torture for both of them.

Amanda was beside herself, crying out each time he pushed in, and gasping each time he began to withdraw. She shook her head side to side, needing more of him each time, wanting all of him. The first shock of electrical pleasure she felt rocked her hips under her, allowing Lee a deeper penetration than before. Squeezing his hand tightly, she pulled it tight to her head, the other hand digging into the muscles of his shoulder blade.

Feeling her tightening, Lee picked up his pace, faster, shorter strokes. As wave after wave hit her and hearing her crying out his name over and over again, Lee knew he was being pulled into her oblivion. Faster he rocked, his body tightening up until at last she screamed his name and he exploded within her, unable to hold back any longer.

The next few minutes were a complete haze for the two of them. Glazed in sweat, they lay in the same position, panting, gasping for air, clinging onto one another, still connected as one.

"Amanda, that was… beyond… that was," Lee was the first to speak, barely.

"Lee, I can't breathe," she finally managed to say.

Rolling off her quickly, Lee looked down apologetically. As he ran his fingers down her temple to trace her cheekbone then her jaw line, he kissed her lips tenderly, "I'm sorry, you ok?"

Looking up at him, Amanda didn't know how to answer him. Her whole body was still tingling, shaking, too sensitive to move. "I don't think you owe me for this morning now," she smiled at him.

"Only you, Amanda, only you," he laughed. "But really, are you ok? I didn't hurt you did I?" Lee asked with concern. "We were…. That was …. Pretty intense."

"Lee, I think I just need to rest for a few minutes and I'll be ok." Amanda replied. Rolling onto her side, her back to him, she curled her knees up just a bit. Lee couldn't help notice. The last few times they had made love she had stretched her body out beside him, draping her leg over his.

"Hey, are you sure you're ok?" Lee sat up, rubbing her arm with his hand.

"Come lay with me?" she asked, answering his question with a question. Slipping behind her, he slid his arm under her head, wrapping his other arm across her tight stomach. Taking his hand in hers, she pulled it up and held it against her chest, between her breasts. Lee could feel her heart pounding still. "That was one heck of a way to end date night."

Laughing, Lee pulled her close, and replied "It's not over yet."


	23. Confusion

Laying together, time stood still. What may have been a few minutes could have been an hour. Amanda couldn't tell. Her body was tingling still, her heart racing, blood pounding in her ears. She wanted to be touched and at the same time her body was too sensitive still. As Lee laid curled up behind her she could feel him breathing, his breath hot on her skin. He gently kissed her shoulder and whispering he asked again, "Amanda, are you ok?"

She didn't answer him. Instead she slipped her hand out of his and slowly got up and headed to the bathroom. Lee just watched her, not sure what was happening. He waited a few minutes for her come back but when she didn't, he got up and walked to the door, knocking lightly. "Amanda? Hey, what's going on?" he asked softly. She still didn't answer him, so he tried the door. Finding it unlocked, he opened it slowly. Amanda was sitting on the edge of the tub, tears silently sliding down her cheeks.

Kneeling down in front of her, Lee held her face in his hands, wiping her tears with his thumbs. He had no idea what was going on, why she was crying. "Amanda, please, talk to me."

"I don't know…. I don't know what's going on," she answered between haggard breaths. "Lee, I think maybe I need to go home."

"Come here," Lee wrapped his arms around her and pulled her into a hug. Shaking his head, he wasn't sure what to do next.

"Lee, I'm sorry but I really do think I should head home. Mother is going to be home soon and I don't think I have the energy left for her," Amanda wiped her own tears away, standing up slowly as she let go of him.

"Amanda…" Lee stood with her, not sure what to say, what to do.

Without saying another word, she walked back into his bedroom to get the clothes she had worn to his apartment earlier. Silently she got dressed. Lee followed her into the room, pulling his robe around him, confused. Trying to give her space, Lee sat on the edge of the bed and waited for her to finish dressing. As she walked into the living room, her sneakers in her hand, he followed her again, trying to talk to her. "Amanda, talk to me. Why.." Lee started, his voice thick with unspoken emotion.

"Lee, I don't know why…. I don't know what happened…. I just need… I don't know what I need," she said as she sat on the couch, slipping her sneakers on.

"Was it something I did?" Lee tried to reach out to touch her hand but she pulled back.

"No, sweetheart, no…" Amanda reached her hand out to touch his face. She couldn't explain what she was feeling at that moment. She was overwhelmed, over sensitive, over stimulated. She just needed space maybe? She wasn't sure. Taking a deep breath, she continued, "What you did was wonderful… more than wonderful… I'm just feeling… a little…. I don't know… overwhelmed maybe?"

Feeling her hand on his jaw, Lee relaxed just a little. Reaching up, he held her hand with his. "Ok, ok. I'll admit, that was …. Overwhelming… even for me."

"You mean Scarecrow and all his conquests…" she smiled, teasing him, thinking of what Francine would have called them.

"Amanda, it's never been like this before. There is more to us than just that," he waved his hand toward his bedroom.

"You mean more to it than just sex," she said quietly, looking down.

Putting his hand on her chin, he raised her face up so he could look her in the eye. "Yes, much more than just sex." Leaning forward, he gave her a light kiss on her forehead.

"Lee," she whispered, leaning into his lips. "Thank you."

Standing slowly, she wrapped her arms around him, hugging him tightly. Lee held her lightly, not wanting to push her anymore that night. Amanda leaned her head back to kiss his lips gently. "I really should get going. Mother said she was going to a new dance club here in Georgetown. The last thing I need is for her to see me leaving your apartment," she said.

Together they walked to his front door. "Goodnight," Amanda said lightly.

"Night," Lee kissed her gently once more. Closing the door behind her, Lee just shook his head, confused. Walking over to his minibar, he poured himself a shot of scotch and sat back down on the couch. Glancing toward his bedroom, he could still see the messed up bed, his clothes scattered around the room, her dress and shoes at the end of his bed. "Amanda…. " he whispered. Shooting back the scotch he poured, he walked the glass into the kitchen. Walking back into the bedroom he picked his clothes up and put them in the dry cleaning basket. He got a hanger for her dress and carefully placed it on the hanger along with her jacket. He moved her shoes to his closet as well. He wandered from room to room for a few minutes feeling lost. He saw the flowers he had bought for her still on the kitchen counter, so he moved them to the dining room table. He decided the rest of the night was a loss so after a quick shower, he laid in bed to try to get some sleep.

Across town, Amanda wasn't fairing much better. She had that same lost feeling as he did. She arrived home before her mother so she immediately went to her room to shower. Standing in the hot streaming water, all she could picture were Lee's hands on her body, his mouth on hers, and then the look on his face when she was leaving. Just as soon as she turned off the water, she heard her mother come home.

"Amanda? Are you home already?" Dottie called up the stairs.

Pulling on her cotton nightgown, she grabbed her robe as she walked down the hall to answer her. "Yes, Mother, it was an early night," she said. "How was dancing?" Amanda asked as she stepped down the stairs to follow her mother into the kitchen.

"Oh, Amanda, you would have loved this place. The lights, the music… the men… OH…" Dottie emphasized every word with a wave of her hands.

"Mother…" Amanda scolded her, smiling.

"I told you earlier, all you do is work. Darling, you are never going to meet a nice man if you work all the time. I'm just worried about you," Dottie put her hands on Amanda's shoulders.

Amanda couldn't make eye contact but she tried to convince her, "Mother, I'm fine, really. I'll find the right person… someday…"

Dottie sensed something was wrong, "Amanda, sweetheart, what's going on? Are you all right? You just don't seem like yourself."

Giving her mother a quick hug, she tried to hide her face as she answered, "Mother… I'm just really tired. Long days and nights… I just don't think I've been getting enough sleep lately, that's all."

"Are you sure? You've just been moody the last few days. Is something going on I should know about?" Dottie said with concern.

"Mother! I told you, I'm just tired. Really, really tired. So I'm going to go upstairs and try to get some sleep. And since the boys aren't here I might try to sleep in a little tomorrow too," Amanda started walking toward the steps to go to bed.

"Honestly, Amanda, the last time you were this moody you were pregnant with Jamie… ha.. Haa… If I didn't know any better…"Dottie laughed at her joke, then she turned to look at her, "Amanda… you're not…."

Amanda stopped on the steps. "Mother!"

"You would tell me if…." Dottie looked at her daughter, quizzically.

"Mother?" Amanda tried again, but who was she trying to convince.

"Nah, I don't know what I was thinking… You'd need a man for that…." Dottie waved her hand in the air again.

Amanda stifled a laugh. "Good night, Mother," she called as she walked up the stairs.

"Good night darling." Dottie called after her.

As soon as she closed the door to her room, she leaned against it with a heavy sigh. Sitting on the edge of her bed, she picked up the phone and dialed Lee's number.

The phone rang twice in her ear, "Stetson."

"Hi, its me," she whispered loudly.

"Hi," Lee said. "Everything ok?"

Amanda smiled, "I am now. Lee, I'm sorry about earlier. I don't know what came over me. I just…" she tried to put her emotions into words.

Lee sighed on the other end, "Amanda. You don't… It's okay. You got home safe I see."

"Yeah. Mother just got home. She was telling me all about the new dance club near you. All about the men that were there," she laughed.

Lee laughed with her, "Really? Sounds like the place we would like to avoid."

"She said she's worried about me. Said I've been moody lately," Amanda said softly.

"I think you've stretched yourself too thin lately and need some rest," Lee stated. "You're coming and going more than I am, trying to fit everything and everyone in…. You need some sleep."

Amanda shook her head, "I will, tonight. The boys won't be here tomorrow morning so I may even try to sleep in. Will you be okay without me all day?"

"No, but I'll make do… I miss you already," Lee admitted.

"I miss you too. I'll call you tomorrow?" Amanda asked.

"Tomorrow. I love you," Lee said softly.

Hearing her mother coming up the stairs she answered him quietly, "Me too." She hung up the phone just before Dottie opened her door.

"Amanda, were you just talking to someone?" she asked.

"No, no I was just thinking out loud, that's all," Amanda pretended to stretch, stifling a yawn as she did. "I'll see you in the morning, Mother."

"Good night, darling. Sleep tight" Dottie said as she closed Amanda's door.  _That girl needs to get some rest. Talking out loud…._


	24. No Thanks for the Memories - Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ** A/N - this chapter includes dialogue from No Thanks for the Memories as well as summarized sections of the episode. **

 

Sunday morning, Amanda opened her eyes at 10:25. Shaking her head, she slowly got out of bed, feeling off, slightly dizzy. She pulled on her robe and made her way down the stairs to find her mother sitting in the kitchen drinking coffee and reading the newspaper. "Amanda. I thought you were going to sleep the day away."

Pouring herself a glass of water, Amanda leaned against the counter and sipped it. "I must have needed more sleep than I thought. Any plans for the day, Mother?"

"Edna Gilstrap called. She needs some help in her garden. Something is getting to her flowers. She asked me to come figure it out. How about you, dear?" Dottie asked, eyeing Amanda with concern.

"Well, the boys need to be picked up in a bit, but other than that, I thought I would just stay close to home. Rest, maybe do some reading." Amanda said, still trying to shake the 'off' feeling she had.

"Amanda, are you feeling alright? You don't look well." Dottie was watching her shaking her head.

Rubbing her face, Amanda decided, "I just think I'm off. Slept too long maybe. Some coffee should perk me right up."

"Oh I hope you are not coming down with that bug going around," Dottie reached forward to test her forward for a fever.

"I'm fine, Mother. Just some coffee, something to eat. I'll be good to go. After all," she started.

"Breakfast is the most important meal of the day," they said in unison, laughing. Dottie smiled at her, "Well then let me make you some toast. A little jelly on it? Just like when you were a little girl."

Amanda smiled back at her, "Thank you, Mother, that sounds perfect. I'm just going to go upstairs and change." Giving her a quick hug, Amanda walked back up to her room, still trying to shake the off-balance feeling she had.

Closing her door, she sat on her bed and picked up the phone. She dialed Lee's number again, only this time he answered it on the first ring. "Hi."

She could almost see him smile through the phone, "Hi yourself. Are you just waking up?" he asked.

"Yeah, but I think I slept too long. My head feels off," she admitted.

"Kind of dizzy? Almost like your equilibrium is off?" Lee asked worriedly.

"Yeah, something like that. Mother is making me some toast with jelly now… Maybe some sugar will help. And coffee…" she told him.

"Do you feel any better about last night?" Lee asked. He didn't want to push but he was worried about her now.

Amanda smiled, "I do. I'm sorry. The way I acted. It wasn't fair to you. That was… a great date night…"

Lee let out a sigh of relief. "Yeah… that was a …. Great, great date night. We should do it again sometime."

"Uh huh. Listen I should go. I'm going to keep a low profile today, you know just pick up the boys and do some things around the house. I've got classes with Beaman all morning tomorrow so how does lunch sound?" Amanda asked, thankful he wasn't angry with her.

"Lunch tomorrow? With you? Hmmm, I'll have to check my schedule but I might be able to squeeze a few minutes in," he teased.

"I'll see you tomorrow," Amanda laughed as she hung up the phone. Changing quickly into sweatpants and a sweatshirt, she headed back downstairs to enjoy the coffee and toast waiting for her.

The rest of Amanda's day was pretty much the same. She picked up the boys and spent the rest of the day reading, eating small snacks to keep the "off" feeling from coming back. She couldn't figure out exactly what was wrong, she just didn't feel right. After a simple dinner of soup and grilled cheese sandwiches, she decided going to bed early might be a good idea. Dottie promised to get the boys to bed on time.

On Monday morning, Amanda woke up feeling much better. She headed to work, only to be pulled into three classes with Beamon on Surveillance techniques. During a break, she realized what time it was and ran up to Q Bureau to let Lee know she had to cancel their lunch date. Monday afternoon she spent cleaning up the old filing system in the vault while Lee was out in the field. He was working on a security contract for a new senator and his family. Monday evening she spent running around with the boys at practice then chasing them at home to get their homework done.

Tuesday was basically a repeat of Monday, class with Beamon, this time on analyzing profiles and a trip to the shooting range which was never a good day for anyone when Amanda was involved. After three tries to just hit the target and 2 hours later, Amanda managed to grab a few minutes with Lee in the Q bureau to eat the sandwiches she had brought from home. The rest of the day was spent in meetings with Billy or in another class with Beamon.

Amanda and Lee thought they would be able to sneak away for dinner Tuesday night but Phillip had brought home his progress report which was less than stellar. Amanda spent most of the evening going over all his homework with him to try to help get him back on track.

Wednesday dawned and Lee was determined to spend some quality time with Amanda, thinking maybe a breakfast date would be good until he got a call from one of his contacts that there was another hit on the new senator's life being planned. He hated giving Amanda a rain check yet again but knew it was completely avoidable. He spent the rest of the day chasing down leads in order to secure a warrant for an arrest.

With everything going on at work and Amanda's boys at home, they didn't have a chance to really sit down and talk about everything that had happened over the weekend. Or about the secret countdown they both had. They couldn't talk about it at the office, who knew who could be listening. Amanda couldn't talk about it at home because her mother was on her like a hawk. So silently they resigned to wait it out.

When Amanda woke Thursday morning the first thing she did was check her calendar. Maybe her days were wrong, maybe she had counted wrong initially. Sitting on her bed, she counted, once… then twice… then a third time.  _Today's the day…. Or it should be anyway._ She prepared for work, showering and dressing, nervously checking each time she went to the bathroom for any sign, any indication she might not be pregnant. Putting a smile on her face, she went downstairs to face her family for the day. The King household was as active as always. The boys running around trying to get ready for school, Dottie doing her best to corral them to eat breakfast. Amanda wanted to get to work as quickly as possible to try to find a few minutes to talk to Lee privately. She gave everyone a hug and a kiss before leaving for the Agency.

Arriving just before 9, she was immediately called down to Beamon's office where she received her first Class C interrogation assignment. Knowing this meant she had to cancel their lunch date once again, she headed up to Q Bureau hoping to catch Lee. He wasn't in, so she wrote him a note and started to tape it on his computer screen when she heard the door open.

"Hi," she said turning toward the opening door.

"Hi," Lee said back as he closed the door behind him.

"I was just leaving you a note. I gotta cancel lunch again…" She started.

"Again?" Lee sounded annoyed.

"Yeah, I'm sorry… It's work…" she tried to explain.

Throwing the file he had under his arm onto the table, he replied, "That is the third time this week."

Sighing Amanda replied, "Oh I know but Beamon called. He wants me to check out that possible bogus passport the Fins called about." She couldn't resist running her hands up the labels of his suit coat and down his arms. "The man's in the hospital… Its my first Class C Interrogation." She brought her arms around him to pull him closer.

"Ah ha. Now a Class C is a soft interrogation, lots of hand-holding, sweet talking. Maybe we can make up for lost time by practicing on me." Lee pulled her close, trying to give her a kiss.

"I don't think you need any practice," she laughed, kissing him quickly.

"Ha, ha. Amanda, I don't see you enough." Lee sounded disappointed.

"I know I'm sorry but its work and now you know when we're at work we have to behave like we're at work. Someone could walk in the door any minute." Amanda was trying to reason with him but Lee was shaking his head muttering "Mmm-hmmm."

"How very very practical of you except we are not at work we are not together enough to suit me. How about dinner tomorrow night at my place?" Lee asked suggestively.

Laughing Amanda replied, "You don't have any food at your place."

Lee flashed her his dimpled smile and simply said "Exactly."

Before she could answer, they heard a sound in the hall. Separating instinctively, Amanda walked toward the door, grabbing her purse on her way by. "I'll call you later," she said as she left the office, heading home to get changed. She was assigned to the hospital where she would pose as a member of the Ladies' Auxilary to interrogate "Mr. Erik Stringal".

An hour later, she had a simple conversation with "Erik", chatting about an old Western TV show, Maverick, her boys, and Finland. She found an inconsistency with his story as he tried to explain his interesting accent. He also failed a simple question regarding a popular music festival. As she was leaving, another man walked into the room, claiming to be from the Finnish Consulate. She left the cart beside his room, and hearing the men speak Russian, immediately started recording their conversation on a portable device as she went to find a payphone to call in a surveillance team.

Amanda was unaware that back at the Agency Beamon was having a fit. In Billy's office, he demanded to know how she knew anything about procedures and Flash priorities. Lee tried to stay calm but his nerves were slightly on edge. He snapped back, reminding him that she has had more experience than half the operatives in the Agency. Billy just watched the two men bicker for a few minutes before the phone rang. The agent on the other end confirmed Amanda's suspicions - the KGB was also following her mark. Lee couldn't help but smirk in pride.

Lee was sent to meet her at the restaurant where she was waiting. She had followed "Mr. Stringal" there, assigning the surveillance teams to their posts, also noting which patrons were also KGB.

"Nice going, this is the first Class C interrogation in history to turn into a full scramble," he said as he slid into his seat beside her.

"Well don't thank me, thank the Russians," she answered in a very business-like tone. "Guy at the bar in the gray suit is KGB."

The next few minutes they spent confirming the KGB agent was just posing as an Embassy chauffeur, and "Mr. Stringal" was in the restroom, the rear exit of the building covered by a surveillance team. He was, in fact, searching for Amanda's address in a phone book and borrowing a delivery man's coat and hat managed to slip past the team and onto a delivery truck as it pulled away. He was seen by another team getting on the Metro so they were in scramble mode again. The rest of the afternoon was a total loss. He had managed to escape all the surveillance teams including the KGB. Amanda headed home to her family for the evening.

"Hello Mother, I didn't expect to find you at home," she said as she walked into the kitchen.

Dottie was looking over her lesson book for her flying lessons. She had talked about flight school before however, Amanda had taken it as a joke. She had even bet Lee the real reason wasn't to learn to fly but to conquer the teacher, Captain Curt. Listening to her mother explain the plane she would be flying, she realized there was more to it. And when her mother described Captain Curt as "53, 6 foot 2, a real buff hunk" Amanda knew she won the bet. As her mother walked away to go to class, Amanda spotted someone climbing into her boys' treehouse. Thinking it was just one of the neighborhood children she went outside to tell him to get down only to find it was "Eric Stringal". "Eric was really Zhmed Dorloff and he wanted to defect. Immediately Amanda called Lee.

Once at Amanda's house, she explained to Lee she told Zhmed he was State Department and he would try to do what he could to help. She had figured out he was some kind of speed reader with an excellent memory because he found her simply by her name and a store near her that was printed on the back on a photo she had shown him. Zhmed was afraid of the man who had recruited him, a Russian named Alexis Tolst. Lee immediately recognized the name as a KGB threat. Lee had a conversation with Zhmed while sitting in the treehouse. After convincing Zhmed he would try to help, he reached out to a contact at the State Department who did not have good news. Zhmed didn't have much to offer the Intelligence community and would most likely be sent back to Moscow immediately.

At Lee's apartment, Amanda, Francine, and Billy didn't have any more luck. He only had a few days before he was going to be sent back to Russia. Zhmed knew he didn't have a chance of survival if he was sent back so he begged them to let him help figure out why Tolst sent for him. Reluctantly Billy gave in. They showed him a list of codes to use for messages and he was able to memorize it in under 10 seconds.

Francine, Amanda, and Lee followed Zhmed back to his hotel where they set up camera and listening devices. He was intercepted before he could go inside by Tolst in a limo. He was brought to a secure location where he was instructed to start going over sample documents. He was going to have to memorize 30 charts in only 90 seconds and was given an hour to practice. Later that day he was released back at his hotel where he tried to give Lee a message in a bag of popcorn. He was caught, the message almost destroyed. Amanda tried to follow them but ended up crashing into a piano that was being moved.

That night Lee was at the agency trying to sort through what was left of the message. Calling Amanda, he wasn't sure how she was dealing with Zhmed getting caught.

"That's not the point," Amanda said heatedly.

"I know he trusted you, Amanda," Lee said, "but you can't blame yourself. Zhmed knew the risks he was taking when he volunteered." He had a feeling she would react emotionally to this. "We saved part of his note and we now know that Tolst is going after government files."

"He didn't volunteer! We told him we were going to deport him!" she was angry.

"Alright, duly noted. The point is, so far as the message drop being a bust, those kinds of things happen when you're going up against the best." Lee shook his head in agreement.

Upset she answered, "I feel like we handed him his death warrant."

"No… I don't think so. No Tolst has gone through a lot of trouble not to harm Zhmed now. He's got plans for him, that's why he smuggled him into the country. Now quit worrying, will you? And get back down here as soon as you can. I think we have an all-nighter ahead of us." Lee wished it was a different kind of all-nighter… one like their first night together only two weeks before, although it felt like so much longer.

"All right, I'll see you in a minute," Amanda hung up the phone. She wrote her mother a note, thankful the boys were with their father again that weekend and her mother was out. She ran to the bathroom before she left, hoping there was some sign, some indication she wasn't pregnant. So far, nothing. Hoping she only emotional because of Zhmed, she left to meet Lee at the Agency.


	25. No Thanks for the Memories Pt 2

In Billy's office, he and Lee were talking through the types of files that Zhmed and Tolst would be interested in. Another agent pointed out thousands of files would be sent out the next day to be destroyed. The only types of files going out the next day were medical files which didn't make any sense.

Tolst now had Zhmed hooked up to an explosive device, hoping it forced him to work harder or faster. Tolst walked away to talk to another KGB agent where Zhmed overheard them talking about something called Looking Glass and Operation Rainbow Family.

Back at the Agency, they figured out there were 7 trucks going out with deliveries but only one during the time Zhmed mentioned in his note. Lee planted himself on the truck with Billy and Amanda watching out as backup. They saw a tow truck following and realized that was the diversion. Tolst offered to help fix the now flat tire as Zhmed crawled into the truck. Lee tried to convince him to leave but Zhmed showed him the explosive.

A few hours later, back at the agency, Billy was on the phone trying to find someone at the Pentagon that knew about Operation Rainbow Family and Francine was on another phone trying to figure out what the test results could mean. Between her and Amanda they determined they were stress tests for Air traffic control and Lee made the connection to Air Force Intelligence. Billy made a phone call to confirm Rainbow Family was a squadron temporarily assigned to Andrews Air Force base. Looking Glass was a top secret mission to keep the President safe at all times. The stress test determined the crews and their assignments. Thanks to Zhmed, Tolst could easily determine who was assigned and what shift. The only thing they knew for sure was they were holed up in the Russian Embassy where they couldn't touch them.

A few hours later, Lee and Amanda were at his apartment trying to rest and eat something. Lee noticed Amanda was simply pushing her food around, not really eating. He was worried. "Hey, what's the matter? You okay? You haven't eaten very much?" In the back of his mind, he was hoping she was just worried about Zhmed and nothing else was on her mind.

She couldn't make eye contact with him. Now was not the time to discuss her fears about being pregnant. "I'm just thinking about Zhmed. Once Tolst gets finished with him, what's going to happen to him?", she asked as she finally glanced up at him.

"Once he gets finished with him, he won't have any more use for him anymore," Lee answered honestly, shaking his head. He knew Amanda was going to be more upset over that but he couldn't lie to her.

"You think he'll send him back to Russia?" Amanda didn't want to think of any other possibility.

"Honestly speaking?" Lee looked at her.

"Yeah?" Amanda looked up hopeful he had a good answer.

"I doubt if he'll even get out of DC." Amanda looked heartbroken. "At one time I had a contact at the Russian Embassy. If he were still there today I might have been able to get word to Zhmed to make a run for it. Whatever they have planned for him, they can't do it on Embassy property."

Amanda noticed the newspaper beside her.

Lee continued, "Before they move him from the Embassy, they'll convince him the KGB is everywhere and he'll be afraid to run."

Holding up the paper, Amanda had an idea, "If we could figure out a way to get a message to him, would the agency help?"

"Yeah sure, it might be a little tricky," he agreed. Amanda handed him the paper she was looking at with an advertisement for Maverick, the TV show that had started her conversation with Zhmed in the hospital. Lee gave her a look like she was losing it but he knew her instincts were good. Seeing her smile, he replied, "Come on…." For the next few hours, they put her plan in place.

The Agency had been watching the Embassy for most of the night so when dawn broke, they put her plan into action. Zhmed had determined when a specific Colonel would be flying. Tolst had had extensive plastic surgery to appear identical to the Colonel so he could then take over his identity and steal one of the Looking Glass planes. As the limo left the Embassy, it was followed by multiple Agency vehicles. Beamon cut off the limo as an "innocent driver" distracting the driver of the limo. Amanda and another agent pulled alongside the limo in a taxi cab with an advertisement on the top for Maverick "Go For It Cowboy". Zhmed immediately knew it was them and he quickly got out of the limo and into the taxi as they sped away. Beamon did a great job distracting them further by locking his keys in the car as well.

In the taxi, Amanda showed Zhmed pictures of the pilots when he identifies Tolst. Billy was sent to pick up the "Colonel" and drive him to the base where Lee met him. Tolst was shocked when he saw Zhmed who made a positive identification. After a quick scuffle with Lee, he was arrested. Amanda was there and hugged Zhmed, happy he was okay.

That night, she and Lee finally had time alone. He decided he was going to make dinner for them to celebrate and after, they could talk about them. "And despite your belief that I only keep a wrinkled apple and fermenting cheese in my refrigerator, I want you to know I am preparing a feast Escoffier would be jealous of," he said as he brought a bowl of salad to the table.

Amanda was laying on the couch, absolutely exhausted, flipping through a magazine. "Awe, I really wish you hadn't gone through all this trouble. I think I'm too tired to appreciate it."

"No one's ever too tired to try one of my frittatas. It's a potpourri of eggs, mushrooms, garlic, spinach, everything BUT the kitchen sink." Lee carried a pan to the warmer on the table, not paying attention to Amanda who was now beginning to fall asleep on the couch. "When I was assigned a NATO operation in Capri, I met this wonderful old chef, who shared with me his secret of making the perfect frittata. You don't saute the garlic, but add it to the eggs just before you put it under the broiler. Hmmm. That way you keep the flavor and you don't burn the garlic." He was completely engrossed in finishing up cooking and getting the champagne for them. "So Amanda, think of this as a celebration for Zhmed being accepted into the Defector's Program. Hmm, And I can only speak for myself when I say we are long overdue for some celebrating around here, especially the type that includes just the two of us." By now he had poured two glasses for them and was walking around the couch to give her a glass.

"So with that thought in mind, some romantic candlelight, a little bubbly and a little romance." Kneeling down he realizes she is asleep. Placing the glasses on the table beside him, he leaned in to give her a light kiss, "Very little romance."

Feeling the touch of his lips on hers, she opened her eyes to see him kneeling in front of her. Smiling she replied, "I may be sleepy but I'm not dead." She pulled him closer for a lingering kiss that held promise for the rest of their evening. Laughing Lee looked at her.


	26. Confirmation

Sitting up, he led her to the table where dinner was waiting. He held her chair for her as she sat down, still smiling. He wanted this night to be a celebration but he also knew they were pushing aside the conversation they were both dreading. He knew she was exhausted, more so than he was but he was concerned about this as well. As they ate, he tried to keep the conversation light. They talked about the case and how her instincts were once again right on. He told her again how proud he was of her. Every so often he would bring her hand to his lips, and kiss it gently, hoping that their evening would continue on this path.

Amanda was exhausted. They had been up all night the night before and the quick nap she had taken at Lee's didn't help much. Dinner really was amazing. He was right, the frittata was delicious. The champagne was relaxing her more and more. In the back of her mind, her internal calendar was nagging at her, telling her to talk to him, but her heart had other things in mind.

As soon as the dishes were cleaned up, Lee wrapped his arms around Amanda's waist and held her close. Leaning down, he kissed her gently, slowly. Amanda practically purred in his arms. Knowing she was very tired, Lee wanted to make the most of the rest of the night. He whispered in her ear, "Amanda, we could go to bed early tonight."

"Mmmmm hmmmm," Amanda answered with a shy smile, knowing full well what he meant. Taking him by the hand, she led him into his bedroom. She slowly started unbuttoning her blouse, pulling it out from the waistband of her jeans. Watching, Lee was rooted to the spot he was standing. She then unsnapped her jeans, sliding them off and tossed them toward his laundry basket. Lee shook his head in satisfaction. She was beautiful, standing there in her simple cotton bra and panties.

"Are you going to join me tonight or am I sleeping alone?" she teased.

"No, I'm ah… I'm going to join you… unless I get to just watch," he teased back.

Amanda was slightly confused. She really was tired so her brain wasn't translating as quick as it normally did. Lee could see her confusion and stepped forward to kiss her passionately, distracting her from his insinuated joke.

She began to help him unbutton his shirt and remove his pants as well. Together they sat on the edge of the bed and Lee knew he had to ask her. "Amanda, I don't want to interrupt…. Our…. moment here… but, are things… okay?" He didn't really know how to come out and ask her if she thought she was pregnant or not. She had said from the beginning it could take another week even to know for sure but she had already been pregnant twice, she must know all the signs already… even he could see a few.

Swallowing hard, she looked at him and answered honestly, "Well, I'm late."

Lee's heart was immediately in his throat. "Is that bad?"

Shaking her head, she looked him in the eye, "Depends on what you consider bad. Bad for us right now, right this minute… No. We aren't interrupted right now if that's what you mean. So let's not talk about it now. Tomorrow…. After we both get some rest, then we can figure out what to do." Amanda ran her hand up alongside his chin as she leaned in to kiss him.

Lee didn't know what to feel. His mind was telling him to press her for more answers but his body was definitely telling him to shut up and enjoy the evening. He decided to follow her lead. Kissing her deeply, he slid his hands across her body, setting her skin on fire with just his touch.

Together, they explored each other's bodies slowly, with their hands and mouths before finally coming together. Amanda assured him again they didn't need to use a condom, it wasn't going to matter at this point either way. As Lee pushed into her, he couldn't help but groan at the feeling. It was one thing to be covered and safe, it was another to feel every ripple of her inner muscles holding him tight as he moved within her. It wasn't long before the two of them were covered in a thin film of perspiration, breathless, trying to hold on to one another as they exploded together in sheer ecstasy. With their hearts still racing, Lee held her tight against him as they drifted off to sleep.

The next morning, Amanda woke before Lee. She carefully extracted herself from his arms and legs that were holding her and headed into the bathroom. As she relieved herself, her first thought was did she dare look to see if there were any signs. She wasn't feeling off, she had slept great wrapped in Lee's arms so she definitely wasn't tired. Taking a deep breath, she looked down and nearly cried. Knowing Lee would probably be awake soon, she finished in the bathroom to head into the kitchen to make coffee. Pulling on some clean panties, she quietly grabbed a pair of sweatpants and a T-shirt out of 'her drawer' and headed into the kitchen. Once the coffee was starting to drip, she went back into the bathroom to brush her teeth.

Hearing the water running in the bathroom, Lee woke up. "Amanda?"

"Uh huh, in here," she replied. Rinsing her mouth, she walked into the bedroom to lean over him for a kiss. "Coffee's ready," she said.

Rolling out of bed, Lee made a quick stop in the bathroom, then grabbing his bathrobe, walked into the kitchen. He was thirsty so he poured himself a glass of orange juice and without a second thought, poured another one for Amanda. She had just finished making a few slices of toast, not her usual big breakfast Lee realized.

They brought, the juice, coffee, and toast to the table and Amanda went to get his newspaper from the hall for him. Together they sat in comfortable silence. Amanda took a few bites of her toast, thinking she would wash it down with a large sip of juice. As soon as she swallowed, she immediately covered her mouth and ran to the bathroom. Lee sat there, confused at first but stood up to follow her. "Amanda? Are you… ?" he started to say but stopped as soon as he heard her vomiting. Walking into the bathroom, he got a washcloth and wet it for her to wipe her face. As she sat on the edge of the tub, he filled a glass of water for her. "Rinse. You'll feel better."

Smiling weakly, Amanda did as he instructed. Spitting it into the toilet, she flushed and sat down on the lid. "Amanda, I …. I think we need to talk about this." Lee knew there were no other options. "What are we going to do?"

Amanda looked at him strangely. "About what?" she asked, slightly confused.

Now it was Lee's turn to be confused. "About what? You know what…" he said, shaking his head.

"Lee, we don't need to do anything," Amanda stated. "Let's go finish our breakfast. I need coffee." She started to stand up but he put his hands on her arms to stop her.

"Amanda! This… You…. us….." He couldn't get the words to come out of his mouth.

"Lee, we are fine… this is fine… and you are fine…" she said with a wink.

Lee stood there shaking his head trying to figure out how she was so calm. "THIS… is not fine… Amanda, what are we going to tell your family? Billy? FRANCINE?! She will never let us live this down…" he started.

"We don't need to tell anyone anything. They don't need to know. At least not until we are ready to tell them." Amanda said, still very calm.

"And how long do you think that's going to last? I mean, they're going to know," Lee was all worked up now.

Amanda thought for a moment. "Hopefully we don't have to tell anyone for months. I mean I don't want them to separate us at work. And well, I think eventually Mother will be happy. You'll have to start spending time with the boys for them to get used to you."

"Months? Months? You seriously think we can keep this under wraps for months?" Lee was nervously running his hands through his hair.

Seeing this, Amanda stopped him. "Are you having second thoughts… about us?"

Stunned, Lee looked at her. "Amanda, no… why would you think that? I love you."

"Then why are you being so…." Amanda didn't have a word to describe his behavior. She waved her hands at him instead.

"How can you be so calm about being pregnant?" Lee asked.

"What?" she was stunned.

"Amanda, all the signs are there. The dizziness, the exhaustion, your breasts were… well… super sensitive the other night…. And now this... Morning sickness… And you're late. You said so yourself." Lee wanted to shake her but instead just held tight to her hands.

Looking at his face, she started laughing. He was white as a ghost, panic-stricken and she stood there laughing.

"Amanda?" Lee whispered.

Taking a deep breath, she took his hands in hers. Looking him in the eye she said simply, "I'm not pregnant."

He didn't believe her. "But the symptoms…"

Again she repeated, "I'm not pregnant."

Lee just looked at her and repeated back, "You're not pregnant? You're sure."

Smiling she said, "yes, I'm sure, I'm not pregnant."

"But you just… got sick…" Lee gestured from the kitchen to the bathroom.

"Have you ever drank orange juice after brushing your teeth? I don't advise it. As far as everything else, we've been non-stop for almost 2 weeks straight. Lack of sleep, run down, will make your body and hormones do crazy things," Amanda tried to explain.

"And you're sure, you are 100% sure, you're not pregnant." Lee wanted, no needed concrete proof what she was saying was the truth.

"Well, if I am, that full box of tampons under your bathroom sink is going to remain full for awhile…" she said, trying to give him the most direct hint she could.

"Oh," he said nodding his head. Then it dawned on him, "There's a full box of tampons in my bathroom?"

Laughing Amanda put her arms around him and said, "Not a full box for long."


End file.
